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TS? TV? TG? GQ? NB? An Excellent Read

Started by Susan522, August 10, 2014, 11:37:24 PM

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Susan522

"Some people theorize that people can have a "repressed transgender identity" and that the process of deciding to transition is a question of determining whether one has such an identity. This frames the process of transgender identity development as a discovery process. If one has cross-gender feelings one needs to discover whether they are "really" transgender or it is from another cause. This idea is false and also dangerous, because once someone identifies with something, it becomes reified and leads to one acting from one's self-concept rather than organic desire. Identities are constructed, not discovered....The queer community encourages the opposite of this process. It encourages the construction of more and more identities, inventing a blizzard of new terminology that is ever changing. It is not surprising that this happens, because the queer community is a haven for marginalized and vulnerable people and those struggling with their sexuality. Retreat into concepts is a way to keep one safe. People are where they are and need to do what they need to do for safety. However the retreat into concepts has a cost of disconnection from the instinctual desires of the body. It is particularly dangerous when these narratives involve the idea that one must change their body to be whole.

It is my belief that the adoption of transgender identity itself is at cause for some of the dysphoria people experience. I have known people who for 40 years have been mostly okay with being perceived as one gender, but after transition experience that perception as life-threateningly distressful. The only change here was that they adopted the transgender identity. For myself, I was pretty okay with being perceived as male as a teenager, and then when I transitioned that felt horribly threatening, after letting go of my transgender identity I am again okay with being perceived as male.

At the queer counseling center I worked at, one of the directors told me that there was a 400% increase in transgender clients in the last few years.


Go here to read more:

http://thirdwaytrans.com/2014/07/13/there-are-no-identities-lurking-in-the-shadows-of-the-psyche/
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helen2010

Susan

An interesting counterpoint to the prevailing view.

The author's experience and backgound is illuminating:

"I am someone who transitioned MTF at age 19, and retransitioned to male presentation at age 39. I never imagined that this would happen, as I believed that I had an essential female identity that required me to transition both socially and physically. However, there was always a part of me that was still restless, even after transitioning.

I worked through a lot of trauma in therapy and discovered that I could be comfortable with presenting male after all, and that it was good to let go of the need of be seen as female. Much to my surprise it was possible to become okay with being seen as male, because it does not limit me from being who I am. I wish I could have saved myself all of this trouble and worked through these issues psychologically and I am concerned that the psychological community does not present this possibility."

Whether the author's experience is generalisable, or a means of rationalising their reversal of a flawed decision, I will leave it to the more qualified to decide.  It is nevertheless the author's experience and narrative and I will respect it as such.  Perhaps they could have benefited from spending more time in therapy before their initial transition, as it may have avoided their transition/retransition experience.  While it reminds me that every experience is unique,  it doesn't align with mine.

Safe travels

Aisla
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Carrie Liz

From one person's perspective, this is understandable. Everyone has different experiences.

My question, though, is where the hell are all of these "fad" trans people that the author speaks of on the FtM spectrum? Where? I hear people talk about them all the time in blogs and on Youtube, but I've never seen any of them. Is this just a west coast thing? Is it seriously a "fad" other places? I mean, seriously, here in Ohio I've NEVER seen someone who claimed to be trans who didn't go through severe emotional turmoil to arrive at that point. Hell, you barely ever even see trans people in public here at all because a lifetime of repression has made us all so introverted.

Again, am I missing something here? Is being trans seriously a bandwagon in other places that people just jump on because they want freer gender expression, not because they were genuinely uncomfortable with the body of their birth sex?
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helen2010

Carrie

I agree.  Trans* is not a choice - it's certainly not a fad and it shouldn't be seen to be a fashion choice; it certainly isn't a lifestyle choice.  Personally, I find these sorts of articles triggering, because it feels to me that they are seeking to challenge and question the entire trans* experience.  I have seen the religious right publish similar stuff, and now we see a writer with dubious credentials who admits to not having thought their transition through, questioning the identity of the entire trans* community.

An excellent read?!!!

Aisla
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Susan522

I find it thought provoking because it challenges the prevailing group think which can and does lead to an immense amount of unnecessary turmoil and strife.

Attacking the author as having "dubious credentials" for offering his own thoughts on his own personal experience is a cheap shot IMHO and not becoming an advocate of inclusive exploration of a diversity of opinions and life experiences.

The author goes on to say in his subsequent comments that:
"I don't think it would have been possible for me to avoid transition at 19 given what I knew, and the world at the time. If I had avoided it, I think there would be a very high chance I would have done so later, as I wouldn't have the knowledge I have now. We can only do what we can with the knowledge that we have. It is also healthy to adapt to new knowledge and let go of things that no longer serve.

I do think I might have been able to de-transition 5 years later before I had SRS if I had different support or knew more, but I didn't.

I think people should transition if it will improve their quality of life and not transition if it doesn't. It is also okay to de-transition if it one realizes it does not improve their quality of life. I also think there are many cases where it doesn't improve people's quality of life but they persist because it feels like a compulsion or an essential identity rather than something which serves them, and they can't find a way out of it."
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helen2010

Susan

I give more weight to respected experts.  I give less weight to those who are less qualified.  But each to their own.

As for those folk other than the writer suffering from 'group think' - you have an interesting perspective...

Aisla
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Susan522

"As for those folk other than the writer suffering from 'group think' - you have an interesting perspective..."

:D :D Ya think?  Hey GQ/NB just doesn't work for me.  Just because it works for you does not mean that the other 99% of the human race for whom the binary does work, is suffering from "group think".

Perhaps you might allow others to form their own opinions about the authors thoughts without imposing your vast "experience and expertise".
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Carrie Liz

I appreciate the author's insights, as there are some interesting things in that blog about compulsive behavior and what may lead to some's decision to transition, the spiraling dysphoria, the overcompensation, when really they're not addressing their core problems.

It's always good to hear another perspective to check my motives. And I can recognize many of those "fragile identity" behaviors in myself from earlier in transition... the feeling of being threatened when misgendered, being super-defensive, constructing narratives, etc. I appreciate that. And I really appreciate the part where he talked about how two of the happiest trans people he knew were ones who didn't transition because they had no other choice, they transitioned after realizing that they could survive either way, but they just chose to be female. That one hit home.

So yeah, again, reading differing opinions, even ones that I don't generally agree with, always has merit, and I'm glad to have read the blog.

Again, though, I want to know, where are all of these people who are transitioning as a "fad?"
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AnonyMs

Quote from: Susan522 on August 10, 2014, 11:37:24 PM
At the queer counseling center I worked at, one of the directors told me that there was a 400% increase in transgender clients in the last few years.
I believe that's caused by the Internet. There's been an explosion of information available in recent years, and its easier to access than ever. When you can see so many transgender people on YouTube for example, it starts to become much easier to explore your own feelings, and the knowledge that there's plenty of others like you helps you move forward.
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stephaniec

sounds like a lecture from a reparative therapy class
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kelly_aus

Hmm.. Apparently I have a 'Complex'.. Good old Jungian psychology - oh, but he has no qualifications to say that..

This is one man's opinion, one that disregards accepted and well researched concepts.

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stephaniec

Quote from: AnonyMs on August 11, 2014, 01:22:44 AM
I believe that's caused by the Internet. There's been an explosion of information available in recent years, and its easier to access than ever. When you can see so many transgender people on YouTube for example, it starts to become much easier to explore your own feelings, and the knowledge that there's plenty of others like you helps you move forward.
yes very true
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suzifrommd

Quote from: Susan522 on August 10, 2014, 11:37:24 PM
"Some people theorize that people can have a "repressed transgender identity" and that the process of deciding to transition is a question of determining whether one has such an identity. This frames the process of transgender identity development as a discovery process. If one has cross-gender feelings one needs to discover whether they are "really" transgender or it is from another cause. This idea is false and also dangerous, because once someone identifies with something, it becomes reified and leads to one acting from one's self-concept rather than organic desire. Identities are constructed, not discovered....The queer community encourages the opposite of this process. It encourages the construction of more and more identities, inventing a blizzard of new terminology that is ever changing.


What a load of malarkey!

1. We DO explore our identities. We're trying to find a presentation and self-image that allows us authenticity.
2. We all experience being transgender differently. Some of us feel like a woman/man trapped in a man's/woman's body. Some of us feel like we're a third gender, some of us feel androgynous, some of us feel agendered - that we have no gender at all, and some of us feel gender fluid. What the heck is wrong with coming up with a bunch of different words to describe how it feels to us?
3. It is UNIMPORTANT what our identity is. What is important is how we decide we need to live and what we decide we need to do to feel authentic.
4. Is it possible the reason why there are so many more transgender patients is that (1) people are more aware and (2) people feel safer because of public awareness, and that the increase has NOTHING TO DO WITH a "retreat into concepts".
Have you read my short story The Eve of Triumph?
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helen2010

Suzi

Agree.  Malarkey pretty much sums it up. 

Aisla
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Jennygirl

Definitely some poignant views in OP's excerpt. 

I also do not agree that being trans is some sort of fad. There is no way that someone knows what a fad is when they are 5-7 years old and already experiencing gender variance. When a person is that young, they probably don't even understand what gender variance is! So many of us have memories from being young and already aware of our differences or even dysphoria. At the time though, we are not in the right place to do something about the physical aspect- at least not until later in life.

There are many viewpoints and perspectives one could take, but not one of them alone works for the whole. There are too many circumstances, and everyone has a unique story. This writeup focuses on one possible scenario, and is kind of understandably directed at the recent influx of trans individuals (almost trying to come up with a reason why it is 400% up).

The only reason it is triggering is because the author seems to allude that if it makes sense for one person, it makes sense for everyone. And considering the whole choice / not a choice topic is part of the verbiage, it is on incredibly thin ice to begin with ;)
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Jane's Sweet Refrain

#16
Maybe upon closer consideration I'll be able to see this so-called "third way trans" perspective as anything but another attempt to undermine the credibility of transsexualism. Its premise, that gender identity is a construct, goes against main-line thinking of neuro-science. Gender identity and gender expression are different things. The difference is subtle and the boundaries between the two are fuzzy, but there is a clear biological impetus to core gender identity that determines whether one ultimately identifies as trans. The cultural constructs of gender give us avenues for expression of that identity, and the two--identity and expression--are braided very early on. Expression reinforces identity, and not having the opportunity causes all sorts of different reactions.

There are--occam's razor-like--cultural reasons for a 400% percent increase in trans-patients. Given that therapists are the gate-keepers for hormone treatment combined with the increased visibility and acceptance of people who are transgender, I think a 400% increase is modest and would expect that number ot double or triple.

Of course, one could imagine that possibility of false positives and fad transsexuals, but they're stawtransmen at this point.

I should go cool off before I get nasty.
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stephaniec

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Jane's Sweet Refrain

Quote from: stephaniec on August 11, 2014, 08:55:05 AM
Jane you look too sweet to be nasty

Hehe. It's a cover and gives me the element of surprise.  >:-)
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Suziack

Well... Of all the threads on the forum this morning, this one has given me the most interesting read!

How many people have a 'need' for the transition experience early in life, right or wrong, in order to sort out who they are and who they are going to be, later in life? This is not to endorse anyone making a mistake. And what are the effects of a non-transition early in life going to be on the individual, later in life? Now, some might criticize me for calling it "the transition experience," but that's all life really is - a collection of experiences from which we learn and change. For some, perhaps it is a 'mistake', yet still a process from which they learn and change. For others, and I think the vast majority, it is not a mistake, but a natural path of following and discovering one's identity, and that's important because  it is only when living one's true identity that they are going to vigorously meet their true potential. If they are fortunate enough to recognize this at an early age, and able to pursue it, then they are very fortunate!

PS. The collective societal pressure is what, traditionally, has lead to false identities that STOP people FROM transitioning. If anyone who has posted here who has de-transitioned could go back and do it over again, without transitioning, would they?

PSS. Don't mess with Jane!
If you torture the truth long enough, it'll confess to anything.
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