Hey guys.

I've receive my last letter today. Tomorrow, I'll FINALLY fax the whole thing to the office of Docteur Brassard.

I've read quickly another post about being undecisive on the procedure.
I want to talk with guys who had meta.

I wanted for a long time the phallo but I figured out that mostly, I wanted the phallo for four reasons, in order :
- Being able to be perceive as an attractive man/just a normal other guy by gay men
- Being able to stand peeing.
- Having testicules and no more bonus hole.
- Be able to penetrate.

But the more I think of it, the more the complications of the phallo are getting on me.
My deepest fear is to end up with no sensation.
And the more I think about it, the more I think that whatever I do, there's no point of getting a specific surgery to attract gay men. Because if they are to reject me, they will reject me whastever surgery I have. And penetration is quite a minor issue.

However, bottom surgery is really important to me. Metaidoplasty seemed like a confortable choice :
- no lost of sensation
- no more bonus hole + testicules
and no years of waiting list. (I'm in my mid-thirties, I had enough, I want a conclusion to that transition thingy thing.)

But I'm afraid that in the loooooong run, i'll be deceived.

It's ridiculous but I'm afraid I'm not enough developped.

Can you stand peeing with a metaidoplasty?
What are the reactions of potential partners, to metaidoplasty?

Regards

If your growth is not enough, you might not be able to stand to pee, but you can pee through your penis if you urethra work done.
If you choose to have metoidioplasty and not satisfied, you can still pursue phalloplasty in the future.

The surgeries, in Canada, are paid.
Of course, I can't pay on my own for the phallo. And I have the impression that I won,t get a second chance to this ''Free pass''.

I can understand the indecisiveness.

My husband was going back and forth on what one he wanted.

He did settle for the Phallo so yes its a very long wait.

I wish you the best in your choice.

I can totally understand the indecision here, but feel it's important that you get the procedure you truly want. The benefits I see in phallo, aside from those you've already mentioned, are that you can pick your own graft site and you'll end up with a neophallus similar to that of a cisman. I think the different graft sites have a potential to affect the resulting sensation. If grafted from the thigh, for example, there is a chance of the surgeon being able to also graft a sizeable amount of nerve throughout the shaft that is kind of up to chance as to whether it will take or not, but would be well worth it.

Personally, I am still young so, I am looking into the metoidioplasty with the understanding that I will not really be able to have penetrative sex. Which isn't something I am terribly concerned with at this point in my life. I just want to be able to stand to pee.