Wow! Even though the time has gone really fast so much has happened it kind of feels like a lot more than a year. And what a year!!
I had been on another forum initially and while there were some nice folk there it wasn't well moderated and constantly going into meltdown. One member there (who had started not long after me) was a constant total drama queen and I remember her whinging about being kicked off Susan's (with a string of profanities) and I thought to myself "any place that won't have you as a member is the place for me!" So yeah, that's how I ended up here.
It's been great for me too. The internet didn't exist when I had my first attempted to transition in 1989 and support networks were pretty thin on the ground in Sydney back then. When that transition came to an end two years later it was a lack of support and access to shared experiences and info that was a crucially missing component at the time. And while I made sure I had professional support in place for this tilt at transition I also wanted to connect with others through a forum like this. And not just the trans women, it's awesome there are so many lovely ladies here but also really, really fantastic there are so many wonderful guys and great non-binaries too, because that has helped to give me a much deeper understanding of what it means to be transgender; something I may have struggled with.
I guess I came here with a lot of my internal conflict largely nullified, I was already on HRT and planning the next steps but I still had my doubts. It really helped me to realise that I wasn't alone, that what I was feeling about my gender identity wasn't just something I'd concocted, that there are so, so many others experiencing (or who had experienced) similar or worse. It gave me a lot of perspective. The sincere compliments I received too did wonders for my self confidence I have to say. I was initially pretty doubtful I'd manage to pass, let alone transition, but people here pretty quickly dissuaded me of that notion with genuine feedback. Most of all the support and friendship I've found here was totally beyond my expectations.
Jessica, Cindy, Jenny and others, your support and camaraderie when I was planning on going full time, and the loving prodding that saw me go over that line a good three months earlier than I was meticulously planning for has been so deeply appreciated by me, you have no idea!
There are many wonderful people here who, even though I may only know them as their avatar and their forum name, I have grown close to and who I've come to respect immensely for their insight, sense of humour and deep compassion. For my friends in the US and Canada and Europe I often wish I lived next door so we could share a beer, or a face to face chat, to share your happy times and hug you when you were down. The tyranny of distance I guess. I am fortunate however to live in a city that boasts a bevy of wonderful ladies and folk from Susan's - a number of whom I've met up with over coffee, or a meal, and become friends with... something that probably never could have happened without Susan's. How freaking awesome is that?? If I'd managed to get to Adelaide for Cindy's conference the other week I would have finally been able to meet up with her too, not this time but soon OK, sis?
And of course I was asked to become a moderator. Actually, I think Cindy said she wouldn't take no for an answer.
It was an honour to be asked, and while it has had its moments and has even been heart breaking at times, I have never regretted being a mod - it's a great team of people behind the scenes who all have the best interest of the members and the forum at heart.
Anyway, um, this became a lot longer than I intended so I'll just finish by saying thanks to Susan for setting this forum up in the first place, it has helped so many people in so many ways, myself included.
Yay!!
