Quote from: Leah443 on November 13, 2014, 06:48:38 PM
I have never really been called a ->-bleeped-<- so i can't say for sure how i would feel. I HAVE been called a shman to my face one and all i did was stare at the person until they left so i think i would be fine. unless they got aggressive with it

Shman, first time I heard that!

Quote from: Devlyn Marie on November 13, 2014, 06:51:28 PM
Shman, first time I heard that!

Yeah if i didn't know it was an insult i would have found it hilarious xD

I honestly couldn't care less. It doesn't offend me. It's just a word. It's the context that counts. If someone were to use it in a disrespectful or malicious manner, then sure, that would bother me, because they were being disrespectful or malicious. If someone was innocuously using it in the place of 'transgender,' then it wouldn't bother me. Depending on the situation, I might tell them I prefer they refer to me as a trans girl, if it's necessary to bring my transgender status into the conversation at all. Otherwise I'd prefer they just address me as any other woman and leave any references to me being trans out of it.

Never been called it myself, but the real world usage I've heard of it.... Well, it's been spat with such hate and vitriol, to me it's a hateful and ugly expression that I would be happy to never hear again. Yes, it is more about the intent than the word itself, as with any turn of phrase, but that is one in particular that presses my buttons (and I'm certain a few psychological triggers).... The kind of crap that drove me into hiding for quarter of century. Screw that word.

It does & it doesn't, some people just don't know the hurt behind the word and educating them helps.

The one word that is used a lot in our community that really bothers & upsets me (it can lead to tears) is "sissy".

I f*&^ing hate when crossdressers use it, I hate it when its used to degrade women as being a weaker sex and I hate the term.

Why does it bother you if a crossdresser self identifies that way? As a CD myself,  I don't use that term, in fact, I usually see people trying to use it as a weapon against us. Like that thing going around Facebook with the transsexual sitting in her underwear. The caption says "I am a woman.  I'm not a sissy with a fetish"  Sooooo, why are you posting on Facebook in lingerie? That's a fetish. This crossdresser manages to keep her clothes on while using Facebook.

Quote from: Nicole on November 13, 2014, 07:59:02 PM
It does & it doesn't, some people just don't know the hurt behind the word and educating them helps.

The one word that is used a lot in our community that really bothers & upsets me (it can lead to tears) is "sissy".

I f*&^ing hate when crossdressers use it, I hate it when its used to degrade women as being a weaker sex and I hate the term.

I know a number of cis women my age and a little older that use it to refer to other women their approximate age. It kind of threw me at first when a few I know used it for me, but then I heard them use it in similar fashion for other cis women many times as well. I guess its similar to using sister or something.

Quote from: Nicole on November 13, 2014, 07:59:02 PM
It does & it doesn't, some people just don't know the hurt behind the word and educating them helps.

The one word that is used a lot in our community that really bothers & upsets me (it can lead to tears) is "sissy".

I f*&^ing hate when crossdressers use it, I hate it when its used to degrade women as being a weaker sex and I hate the term.

Why does being called a sissy bother you so much? If I may ask?

Picture this.

Every single day you were in high school (at an all boys school) being kicked, punched and pushed around being called "the sissy".

I would go home a wreck, crying from the second I was by myself to the second mum came home, the kicking, punching & pushing I could deal with, the word sissy drove me to places I hated being in

Quote from: Nicole on November 13, 2014, 08:45:17 PM
Picture this.

Every single day you were in high school (at an all boys school) being kicked, punched and pushed around being called "the sissy".

I would go home a wreck, crying from the second I was by myself to the second mum came home, the kicking, punching & pushing I could deal with, the word sissy drove me to places I hated being in

I sympathize completely. In junior high school my name was "little f****t sissy boy" and got pummeled on a daily basis.  One day, my 8th grade go-to bully had me pinned down and punched me repeatedly while saying, "You're such a f*****g WOMAN!"  I wonder if he knows by now that he was beating up a girl.  Strangely enough, he was the one whose band got signed.

Quote from: Jill F on November 13, 2014, 08:52:57 PM
I sympathize completely. In junior high school my name was "little f****t sissy boy" and got pummeled on a daily basis.  One day, my 8th grade go-to bully had me pinned down and punched me repeatedly while saying, "You're such a f*****g WOMAN!"  I wonder if he knows by now that he was beating up a girl.  Strangely enough, he was the one whose band got signed.

I'll never forget the look on my mums face when she saw a bruise, I had been hiding it for so long, they never hit me in the face, only around the body and I never wore shorts cause I would have bruises up & down my legs, one day I was getting change and she thought I was in the kitchen and she walked into my room, me half naked, my chest & ribs covered in almost a purple paint.
She fell on the bed, in tears and asked me what happened, I said I was being picked on, she let me get dressed, drove me to school dragged me in to the office, knocked the principal's door down, tore my shirt open and said "if you don't find the c*&^s that did this, I will and I will kill them".

It happened again a week later, this time for 'telling", she took me out of school as the school seemed like it didn't care and about 2 weeks later I came out.

Needless to say, that woman is my hero

After being bullied in elementary school and junior high school and my dad making fun of me at the the dinner table often to my brother's enjoyment, offensive terms just pass through me. I guess I developed a very thick skin out of necessity but then again, I feel strange receiving compliments.

I don't think any terms would bother me. I even joke about the terms people use. I was upset a few weeks back and was crying a little. My friend asked, "Are you crying" and I replied... "No I am just leaking, its ->-bleeped-<- fluid!" then we just laughed and laughed.

Love
Jade

It seems kinda like our version of the N-word that African Americans have now taken ownership of, maybe it's also word that we can use ourselves in a bit of a light hearted and non serious way, but not appropriate for those outside of our 'community to use to refer to us.. It's really the context it is used that determines if it bothers me or not. I have teased some my close friends in the about 'meeting up with ->-bleeped-<-s in bars' when we were catching up and they were looking a little too serious, it definitely helped to lighten the mood lol, but that's my twisted sense of humour.

I've never been called a ->-bleeped-<- before but I don't think I'd like that at all. I'm a woman or if you want to refer to my medical condition then trans, transgender or transsexual are all fine. I think part of the reason why I don't like the word ->-bleeped-<- is because I feel it's, barring cases of reclamation, the vernacular of those who have no respect for us and wish to degrade us. If you turn off the safety filter on Google and go to images and type in "trans woman", "transgender woman", etc and then compare it to the entries that people tag with the word "->-bleeped-<-" you'll see what I'm talking about. The contrast is night and day. ->-bleeped-<- is a derogatory term with severely negative connotations and personally I'd feel quite upset if someone called me that.

Personally I don't like being called that because it is usually followed by some kind of booty call or something. I am not like that. I don't really care about what the general public thinks anyway. However I do sometimes use the word ->-bleeped-<-,  but only with close family who are aware of my gender complication.

I don't like the word but it is tolerable among trans people. Cis people haven't earned the right to use that word. That's how I see it.

There are many worse things to be called than ->-bleeped-<-, sooo, it is not extremely offensive to me...
The same as some transexuals dont like the word and prefer to be classed as transgender...
(But in my eyes, if you are transitioning,  you are transexual)

^ I agree completely
although I must admit i loathe referring to myself as transsexual, simply because of the 'sexual' in the word, i get the feeling that when I use transsexual people view it as like a sexual preference or something?...I don't know, I just don't like it that much
I don't know, I prefer "transgender" or just "trans*"

as for "->-bleeped-<-" I hate it, along with "->-bleeped-<-", "heShe" and "Ladyboy"
I think its almost a combination of "sex-worker" and "fake-woman" (not that everyone who says that means that or that there's anything wrong with being a sex worker). Its the same as calling someone a "whore" and then an extra element of badness and while I'm totally ok when another trans* person uses it to describe themselves, someone else or me/ make a joke  or when a close friend of mine uses it in  a completely harmless/ lighthearted manner, generally speaking I loathe "->-bleeped-<-" and never use it.

As for "sissy" I'm not a fan, I hate it  as much and still never use it.

So that's my two cents, hopefully that's all ok and reasonable
If not its just my opinion and just ignore it

I don't know anyone ignorant enough to use the word ->-bleeped-<- but as far as I know that refers to a ->-bleeped-<- so yes I would be annoyed.