Hi girls .. I so badly need suggestions. Some of you must have read my previous thread that I am moving into a new apartment where everyone knows me as a woman.

Well the reality is finally setting in and I am a nervous wreck. I will finally be starting my life as a girl. Just 6 months ago this was just a dream. Now it's finally happening. I have so many questions. What if I get clocked or someone becomes violent with me

Are there different rules for boys and girls living alone.. Will I be able to manage on my own... I am really really nervous and excited.. Any advice will really help..  Xoxo.. Tia

Hey there c:
I recently moved into a 4 bedroom apartment with 3 other roommates, all girls. 
Depending on how often you will actually be around them, there's a good chance they may not notice.
I was open about it from the beginning, since it was the reason I had to move in the first place.  But, I only told two of them.. I'm still not sure if the third one knows, but tbh I don't care.  Be happy and smile (:
And good luck with bathroom rules d: thankfully we all have our own.

Best of luck moving!

Ps.
Btw, I mean "not notice" because I haven't even started laser* and after a long week I may look a little rough >.<
Lol

Quote from: Madeline182 on November 19, 2014, 02:05:41 AM
Hey there c:
I recently moved into a 4 bedroom apartment with 3 other roommates, all girls. 
Depending on how often you will actually be around them, there's a good chance they may not notice.
I was open about it from the beginning, since it was the reason I had to move in the first place.  But, I only told two of them.. I'm still not sure if the third one knows, but tbh I don't care.  Be happy and smile (:
And good luck with bathroom rules d: thankfully we all have our own.

Best of luck moving!

Ps.
Btw, I mean "not notice" because I haven't even started laser* and after a long week I may look a little rough >.<
Lol

It's more about my neighbors noticing something. I am moving in all alone. So at least not an issue within my flat. Are there some precautions I need to take for protecting myself from my neighbors?

Umm, the only advice I can think of is to not leave the toilet seat up if you are expecting company.  I understand why your nervous, but I don't think any major changes to how you live are necessary.

Quote from: Hanazono on November 19, 2014, 02:43:07 AM
don't invite strangers into your home.

Sure Hana of course I won't..  [emoji5]

As far as neighbors, this might be an American culture thing, but I know none of mine. I doubt they notice that the boy mode person I go to and from work as lives in the same unit as the me I look like normally.

Quote from: skin on November 19, 2014, 02:46:45 AM
As far as neighbors, this might be an American culture thing, but I know none of mine. I doubt they notice that the boy mode person I go to and from work as lives in the same unit as the me I look like normally.

That is exactly how I will be living. Boy more for office. Myself the rest of the time.. If it works for you. I hope it works for me as well..

Just be aware of your area and the people that are around. Try to avoid strict routine that has you leaving and arriving at exactly the same time. Make sure your apartment is well secured. Have your keys ready when you approach your door, don't leave the door open any longer than you need to and don't hang around in the door way. Be careful about who you open the door to.

I moved into new flat several months ago as an owner and there were couple of funny things. I pretty much stuck to myself and most of neighbours did the same (many of them are tenants not owners anyway and in my experience tenants come and go and dont really care what is happening around). Unfortunately, previous owners dropped some bits of info about "guy moving in", so my immediate neighbour (nice elderly lady living next to me) was kinda prepared. Once she said that to me that I do look like a girl and I simply asked her if that is a good or bad thing. Now, we do chat from to time to time and I can attest that people are noticing things but they do not always add 2+2 in their heads and mostly mind their own business. Then there was a lady responsible about maintenance and she once approached me and asked about my clothes size and from the following conversation, it became clear that she meant female sizes. I kinda steered that subject away because long-term elderly inhabitants tend to gossip and I did not want to make life more complicated that necessary.
Basically, I am nice and polite with everyone unless they are asking for trouble, keep to myself and dont give them a reason to hate .

All good advice.

I'll add this, and it is one I always go by. Learn how to answer the door.

Its hard for me to understand why so many people don't know and look out for their neighbors these days. Admittedly, when I lived in an apartment for a short time, I didn't know mine well, but still if anything weird was going on, management was alerted and you could knock on someone's door and ask for help.   I live in a small town now and have very good relations with my neighbors, they look out for me and I look out for them. It'd feel uncomfortable if that weren't the case.

Quote from: Jaime R D on November 19, 2014, 09:34:43 AM
Its hard for me to understand why so many people don't know and look out for their neighbors these days. Admittedly, when I lived in an apartment for a short time, I didn't know mine well, but still if anything weird was going on, management was alerted and you could knock on someone's door and ask for help.   I live in a small town now and have very good relations with my neighbors, they look out for me and I look out for them. It'd feel uncomfortable if that weren't the case.

Peculiarities of urban life or living in a large city? People coming and going, never staying that long enough to form some sort of neighbour relationships? I remember, two decades ago when this country I am living in was a bit different, most of our neighbours were actual owners of their apartments, so they cared about what was happening around, in the building and vicinity. Now, there are lots of students around, staying for a couple of months or a year at longest, living their own lives and not really looking for any kind of socialising.  Elderly people and those less proficient with internet are usually those who want to talk or get to know each other better.

I lived in my apartment for almost two years before flipping the switch into full time girl mode, During that time I came and went in both presentations and no one cared. Now I only come and go as my female self - and no one cares.

As far as how you live - follow the safety and etiquette rules that other girls follow and you'll be fine.


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Quote from: ssneha23 on November 18, 2014, 08:29:49 PM
Are there different rules for boys and girls living alone.. Will I be able to manage on my own... I am really really nervous and excited.. Any advice will really help..  Xoxo.. Tia

Biggest difference, is that when my neighbors are a couple or a family, I'm now friends with the wife. Before it used to be the husband.

I went from living at home with mum to living on my own.

No real rules that I follow, I locked the doors at night, maybe thats the main one.

heres what I say.

1) report any missing underwear or clothes from your washing asap. - had a creep jumping fences in my old area and stealing women underwear, I got him on my CCTV and turned out he was wanted over touching a young girl on a bus as well, they finger printed my fence, got an ID and got him.

2) check your gas before you go to bed.

3) CLEAN as you go, trust me here, its better than having to do a huge clean if someone is coming over. Make sure you clean the sinks everyday.

3) If you have a family near by, talk to them & meet them, it can come in handy if you need someone watching over your place.

4) Invite people over a lot, you can feel a little alone when living on your own, plus it tells people in your area that people are always there

Quote from: Jaime R D on November 19, 2014, 09:34:43 AM
Its hard for me to understand why so many people don't know and look out for their neighbors these days. Admittedly, when I lived in an apartment for a short time, I didn't know mine well, but still if anything weird was going on, management was alerted and you could knock on someone's door and ask for help.   I live in a small town now and have very good relations with my neighbors, they look out for me and I look out for them. It'd feel uncomfortable if that weren't the case.

When I lived in NYC some of my neighbors never really talked to me.

First set of neighbors didn't really speak English or didn't want to talk to me. There were some a few doors down who did talk to me. They were Palestinian but they were actually afraid to tell me, but they were nice people. I try not to judge and they were good neighbors.

Second neighbor in new apartment had weird stuff going on. I would hear loud sex with a young girl at night but the occupant was an old man. So I assume it was probably paid for. However I lived above a restaurant who talked to me and the staff were helpful.

Third apartment I had some good neighbors upstairs. I also had some not so good neighbors right above me who would vacuum 50 times a day (I'm not exaggerating) and I couldn't take the damn noise. Anyway I got flooded twice due to bad plumbing and one guy died and his body was in his apartment for weeks while his oven was  running. Suffice to say I moved out.

Fourth apartment was a two family house. I had moved in with my current wife and her kids and married her. Neighbors upstairs were friendly but we didn't talk all that much. Owners sold the house so we had to move.

Fifth apartment my immediate neighbors were racist and said how the place was going to hell because of all of "these people" moving in. Don't know what they were talking about, I was a good tenant, no noise, paid the rent on time and kept my place clean. This apartment was my first in NJ and actually I had moved away from my wife in my 1st attempt to break up with her. We got back together. I had a friend who lived in the complex but another building. They moved out after we did. The building also had a huge fire and a bunch of people left. They didn't maintain the electrical properly and my apartment had issues where breakers would get hot and trip (no grow lights at my place). I moved out.

Then we bought a house. I love owning a house for the independence but I hate the maintenance and costs. Plus now I am pretty much stuck in NJ and I want to get out of here so bad.