Quote from: suzifrommd on November 19, 2014, 08:16:04 AM
Once someone decides what direction they are going and learns what they need to get there, the need for spending time on support sites goes down. I'm here chiefly so that my experience will help people who come after. Others simply leave the site. It's sort of a natural progression.

^^^^^^^This.

I wish the post ops could stick around for there every day experience it seems it would be quite valuable

Quote from: stephaniec on November 19, 2014, 02:15:08 PM
I wish the post ops could stick around for there every day experience it seems it would be quite valuable

Honestly those that disappear probably have the same as a cis woman. On the other hand if they are clocked and outed frequently they might land back here.

Yeah, um... my everyday experience is "I got up, went to work, had to deal with that one coworker with the really annoying voice, ran errands, came home, hugged the cats, agonized over what to have for dinner, watched some TV/played video games, went to bed." On a really exciting day I have a nap or go out for coffee.

Every Friday, granted, I spend 15 minutes dilating *while* watching TV, but even then the other 23 hours and 45 minutes are just boring regular life.

Quote from: katiej on November 19, 2014, 12:21:45 PM
But I will say that one consequence of stealth and blending in is that trans people aren't visible.  Society is coming along, but most people's concept of us is limited to the awkward transitioner and the freak shows on Jerry Springer.  The vast majority of those who are post-transition blend in so well, even if not fully stealth, society doesn't see them as trans.  It would help our case to have more Janet Mocks, but I totally understand why we don't.

So macro level, it's not necessarily a good thing for us as a group.  But on a micro level, it's great for the individual to be a regular person.

Yeah, it is a bummer that we don't have more voices for our rights, but at the same time, it's not like people are stealth because we're actively denying being trans or anything, it's just that after a certain point nobody even asks you anymore, they just automatically assume that you're cis. So outing yourself would actually take deliberate effort to do.

It just doesn't even make sense after a certain point.

Quote from: Jenna Marie on November 19, 2014, 02:42:40 PM
Yeah, um... my everyday experience is "I got up, went to work, had to deal with that one coworker with the really annoying voice, ran errands, came home, hugged the cats, agonized over what to have for dinner, watched some TV/played video games, went to bed." On a really exciting day I have a nap or go out for coffee.

Every Friday, granted, I spend 15 minutes dilating *while* watching TV, but even then the other 23 hours and 45 minutes are just boring regular life.

that's mundane ,but positive. I like math which most find boring, experience = experience whether mundane or revolutionary

Hope you ladies don't mind me jumping in here! I saw the original post and am curious to know if this is confined to the MTF community, or if you all would say it's more universal. I'm not active at all on youtube, so it's never something I've noticed.

Im under the impression that thats the whole point of all of this transition, eventually its gotta end and the new life starts

For myself, I kept finding I couldn't relate to anyone anymore.
I didn't have a male puberty, because I have some form of AIS.  So in my case, I had a very mild girl puberty, less any menstraition. 
I am naturally, hormonally female, and as such .I have a girls body, and mind.
The kind of support I need is super hard to find.  Not even my doctors know a lot about AIS.

I still will post here and there, but I really can't contribute anymore.

The two lovely trans friends I had 25 years ago have vanished into their happy everyday normal lives,
  One I can still keep in contact with as we were co-workers and still have a mutual friend, she was surprised but not shocked when I looked her up and told her about my "big news" a few years ago. I was very envious when I helped her thru her transition in the early 90's. She did say if I need anything I know how to find her.


Something I just saw this morn,

And then there of course is a tiny percentage of those who disappear and are never seen again (just as in case of cis-population).

I've always told myself that one day I'm going to be a super pretty girl & no one will ever know I was a tgirl. Not sure when that will happen but I'm praying it happens before I'm 21 xD Should be 5 years on hormones by then so I'm sure I'll look very girly :p I'm sure they have similar thoughts & part of no one ever knowing they were a tgirl is completely leaving no trace of it online. That's one reason why I'm always scared to post pictures on this site lol

Quote from: ♡ Emily ♡ on November 19, 2014, 04:43:43 PM
And then there of course is a tiny percentage of those who disappear and are never seen again (just as in case of cis-population).

Hey Emily. Don't ever post pictures of my family again please. SHHHHH, though or I will send the Men In Black to pay you a visit.

But on a serious note. I really worry sometimes about those that just up and disappear. If you want to live your life in stealth, at least a Good bye please. If you want to de transition or live in stealth, at least a "let us know you are OK and now happy" post. I guess I care too much about people I don't even know personally and worry about them. OMG I just realized I am female regardless.

Quote from: Rachelicious on November 19, 2014, 06:51:14 AM
Page 9, 50% vs 33%

http://williamsinstitute.law.ucla.edu/wp-content/uploads/AFSP-Williams-Suicide-Report-Final.pdf

The data is about being "out" versus "non being out," it is not about being "stealth." 


To be stealth you have to come out to at least your doctors and staff, and probably to immediate family and some close friend... so you are out!

I plan my stay at Susan's to be a shorter one.

I have long since dealt with most of my personal demons. I am happy with my life, I no longer contemplate suicide or self mutilation.

What brought me here was a sudden change in income levels that allowed me to suddenly get all my surgeries done instead of thinking I would never get them done.

Once done with body sculpting, FFS, and GRS I plan to disappear, more so than the average girl.

Right after GRS comes my name change, and a relocation.

Phone numbers, email accounts, all will be closed and new ones opened.

I plan to go deep stealth and try to move on with my life. I just need this place right now, because surgery is a big deal and brings up a lot of latent emotional responses.

Kami

Quote from: Jess42 on November 19, 2014, 05:51:38 PM
Hey Emily. Don't ever post pictures of my family again please. SHHHHH, though or I will send the Men In Black to pay you a visit.

But on a serious note. I really worry sometimes about those that just up and disappear. If you want to live your life in stealth, at least a Good bye please. If you want to de transition or live in stealth, at least a "let us know you are OK and now happy" post. I guess I care too much about people I don't even know personally and worry about them. OMG I just realized I am female regardless.

Only problem with saying "goodbye" is it makes a lot of people worry...I'd worry more with any similar post "I'm leaving the Interwebz for good, I'll be OK" can be taken in a very somber way. (And if someone is surveilling you, it gives "them" a chance to save everything to their computer.

I would, if it were me going LOL*snort*"stealth"ROFL...I'd probably just slow down my posting rate, while at the same time deleting a percentage of pics each day...take a week or two, before anyone notices.

"Disappearing transsexuals" I never figured out how the magician saws one in half either.  And now, here's something we hope you really like!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kRW7pITY5Cg&feature=youtube_gdata_player

I would imagine that some high-profile transfolk end up being harassed and stalked due to their internet presence.  If I felt threatened, I would consider pulling up stakes as well.

Quote from: bridget on November 19, 2014, 04:05:57 AM
The post-ops, the not-post-ops, where did they go?  ->-bleeped-<-girl15 on youtube has vanished. Debutante Brawl feat. Penelope on youtube has vanished. Many, many post-ops have seemingly left the internet. In fact, the disappearing post-ops makes me think that srs does not come out that great. How about it? The case of the disappearing transsexuals....

Transsexual do not disappear, they just fade into beautiness...   Dear

I left for a while and came back.

After SRS you feel like you're done, you are no longer trans and don't need a support group or in the you tubers they feel like they don't really have much more to add.

I came back because I missed this place, I like giving a bit of advise here & there and I've met some people on here that once I get to their areas of the world would love to catch up with.