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Transition Addiction

Started by Tori, December 10, 2014, 05:14:45 AM

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Tori

I wonder what you all think about this topic.

It seems to me, transition itself can be addictive.

Even before HRT, little things could help temporarily lift my dysphoria. Dressing up, coming out to friends and family... etc. These effects were always temporary. They did encourage me to do more.

Then HRT and coming out to the world, growing boobs and having fat store in new and squishy places, clothes, shoes, practicing presentation and all kinds of other stuff.

Of course, surgery can be a next step, and there are so many to choose from.

Transition is frightening and thrilling, and yet so many of us work to get to the other side. To put transition behind us.

And then, boring, depressing life is on the other side, just this time we are wearing bras and panties. Hopefully we have shed our dysphoric past.

I imagine there is a bit of a let down for some people once the excitement is all over and the new car smell has faded.

Boobs are cool and all. I grope myself like 437 times an hour. But the rest of the time,  mere seconds really, they are just there.

I dunno, this is a bit of a ramble but I thought I would post it to see if anybody had thoughts on the topic.

Aloha,
Tori


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Ms Grace

I think it becomes a bit of an obsession for some people and they are always working towards one thing or another. I know that's how it was for me the first time I tried, not so much this time around.
Grace
----------------------------------------------
Transition 1.0 (Julie): HRT 1989-91
Self-denial: 1991-2013
Transition 2.0 (Grace): HRT June 24 2013
Full-time: March 24, 2014 :D
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Tori

Yeah, that does not surprise me to hear coming from you.

I am pretty "Meh" about the whole thing lately. HRT lifted my dysphoria, and I am pretty happy with my current gender fluidity but I keep pressing towards female. Besides one surgery, I do not care too much about getting every physical detail perfect (I do want an innie). I am happy with what hormones are doing mentally and physically. Socially, transition may have been a good thing for me. I am making friends easily now.

Grrrr... Writing these new thoughts down is weird. Talking girl stuff and transition never seems to translate from brain to keypad quite as clearly as talking about guy stuff. I hope these posts make some sort of sense.


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katrinaw

Quote from: Tori on December 10, 2014, 05:14:45 AM

I imagine there is a bit of a let down for some people once the excitement is all over and the new car smell has faded.

Boobs are cool and all. I grope myself like 437 times an hour.
Aloha,
Tori

Good subject  ;D

I think the first line would be true for some... personally when I get there I'll be a very happy and elated girly  :-*

The second, dunno not so sure  :laugh: that's a lot of sqeez'in

Love Katy
Long term MTF in transition... HRT since ~ 2003...
Journey recommenced Sept 2015  :eusa_clap:... planning FT 2016  :eusa_pray:

Randomly changing 'Katy PIC's'

Live life, embrace life and love life xxx
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Tori

I take breaks from groping to type. :p


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tuuliu

This is a good metaphor. I get addicted/obsessed easily and transition is one of those things. I think about it almost all the time (and grab my boobs almost as often) so I need to make an effort to think about something else.

I also think you're right that the excitement will sort of stumble once the transitioning process is over. Isn't it like this with anything that you look forward to? The waiting itself is almost more fun than the thing itself. So when I have the energy I try to make myself do something else that works for me. Like writing or drawing. Funnily enough these also tend to touch upon the topic... this will probably change but when, I don't know.

katrinaw

Quote from: Tori on December 10, 2014, 05:36:46 AM
I take breaks from groping to type. :p

Little secret, I used to too.... couldn't believe after all that time I had my own  :laugh:

L Katy
Long term MTF in transition... HRT since ~ 2003...
Journey recommenced Sept 2015  :eusa_clap:... planning FT 2016  :eusa_pray:

Randomly changing 'Katy PIC's'

Live life, embrace life and love life xxx
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justpat

   Tori, I totally agree with you. At the start it is very addictive,you are always looking for answers on everything. Then as the journey progresses and you become more comfortable it eases up a bit and does just become an everyday thing. I am pretty close to the other side,or the end as some might call it, and my life before melt down was never really boring or depressing and I don't expect it to ever be that way post.The journey never really ends ,just goes into a different phase and becomes well,just plain living, the correct life as the person you really are.Yesterday I received my gender change letter and SRS letter just waiting on name change, the light at the end of the tunnel is growing brighter and looks like a big happy face.   :)  Patty.
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DanielleA

When I first started transitioning I would get some serious anxiety at times when I felt  that my transition wasn't progressing. In the end I learnt to have some sort of goal to look forward to,  like a hair cut or buying a new dress ect. It didn't have to be soon but as long as it was on the calendar.
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amber roskamp

I agree its definitely addicting it is pretty much what I think about 75% of the time. that's not exaggerating.
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PucksWaywardSon

I describe myself as having an addictive personality (known from very young which is one reason why I never started smoking - I'd probably have smoked myself to death by now if I ever had) and I totally agree that transition has taken over my mind - but in a way, it's allowed, it even *should* take up most of your runtime, at least to start with, from what I understand. My shrink told me it's the biggest change anyone will ever make in their life. But it's also why I've been careful to keep up with everything else in my life as well, keeping interested in my drama school aspirations and organising trips with friends has kept me that little bit more grounded in the outside world. I still talk about transition about 80% of the time but whenever there's an opportunity to talk about something else I try to take it.

I suspect that training as an actor and the potential (inevitable?) publicity that'll bring with it will keep things interesting and current long after I "finish" transitioning.
Identifying As: Gamer Nerd, Aspiring actor, Wanderer, Shakespeare junkie. Transguy. time I lost the probably there... Hi, I'm Jamie.
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Tori

Always nice to meet a fellow actor.

:)


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Clhoe G

Lol yeah I'm totally addicted ;D, I look forward to my next shot like a junky  :laugh:
Thank-you scorpions...

For looking like Goth lobsters.  :laugh:

Quote.
-Jimmy fallon-

Wow, I could have sworn I've been on HRT for longer.
O well this ticker will help me keep track.

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Tori

Oooooh! Good point.

Those shots work so fast! It is a rush of girl juice hitting the brain all at once.

My Doctor always schedules me first thing in the morning on a Monday, so he can start his week with a happy patient.


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Jill F

Well, I certainly can't stop transitioning, so I guess I must be an addict as well.   

Electrolysis... I just can't get enough of that rush.   Strap me down and turn that thing up to 11!!!
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CrissyMarie

Quote from: Tori on December 10, 2014, 05:14:45 AM
Boobs are cool and all. I grope myself like 437 times an hour. But the rest of the time,  mere seconds really, they are just there.

XD ROFL!!!! This is the greatest thing I have ever read on here.



"I don't always sit like a lady..but when I do" - I sit like a boss!
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Clhoe G

Quote from: Tori on December 10, 2014, 02:30:39 PM
Oooooh! Good point.

Those shots work so fast! It is a rush of girl juice hitting the brain all at once.

My Doctor always schedules me first thing in the morning on a Monday, so he can start his week with a happy patient.

Yeah shots are great, I get 2 every Monday, but I have to do mine myself.
haha ya should have seen me the first time, like 10 minutes later then JAB.
Good fun  ;D
Thank-you scorpions...

For looking like Goth lobsters.  :laugh:

Quote.
-Jimmy fallon-

Wow, I could have sworn I've been on HRT for longer.
O well this ticker will help me keep track.

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katrinaw

E jabs... Sounds like a far better way, especially hearing about the girly feeling hits... Just a shame that my Dr is in an awkward spot makes it hard to drop in and regularly at that  :-\ maybe have to move closer  :laugh:

Still bringing massive grins on your boob comment Tori... Good job  :laugh:

L Katy
Long term MTF in transition... HRT since ~ 2003...
Journey recommenced Sept 2015  :eusa_clap:... planning FT 2016  :eusa_pray:

Randomly changing 'Katy PIC's'

Live life, embrace life and love life xxx
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Tori

Stop making me reply! My hands have better things to do!  >:-)


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Tori

Oh, that started immediately.


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