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When it comes to names!

Started by Skylar105, December 22, 2014, 03:14:55 PM

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Skylar105

I hope this is the right section for this post (as it is about my legal name change.) A long time ago before I had change my name I had a full masculine name (no mistakes at all for a female name.) I then proceeded to pay the 300$ to have it legally changed around july. I had it changed to Skylar Alexander then my last name. I did alexander in respect for a friend since he pretty much gave me the ability to be free from my families problems (he's been a long time friend too). He was pretty humble about as he usually is.

But here's my point with my first name being unisex, and my middle name being masculine will I run into many problems? Because I don't want my full name screaming male. I've read that some girls have male middle names and it's even common in some cultures. (I'm based in the deep south though >.>) I have a family member that was named ashley he's around 50 now. My last name is based on a pink ball that is from a game series. =P But what do you guys think? Did you guys ever question your own name in this way? Majority usually lean Skylar as a female name rather than unisex (Even my family made fun of me for such a decision.) >.> But it's mainly the middle name that concerns me.

Thanks in advanced! =)
I'm always looking for more people to chat with! :)
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immortal gypsy

My name is unisex but today a common nickname for girls. While my current middle name is Luke.  I have handed my health details over with my full name across and still gotten receipts back Ms.

We're lucky in a way we get to choose the name we want.  So as long as you are comfortable with the name. Masculine, feminine,  neutral it is up to you. Remember you are going to see this name and hear people calling you said name for the rest of your life. If you are comfortable with the name that is all that matters.

I use to work with two Alexander(s) (actual spelling), one male one female
Do not fear those who have nothing left to lose, fear those who are prepared to lose it all

Si vis bellum, parra pacem
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Skylar105

Well after doing some more research I've found females that were named Ryan, and dale from birth. They don't get second looks at all. =)
So I'm not really worried about it as much as I was. I don't mind my middle name of alexander, I was just mainly worried about how others perceived it. But I've noticed the mainly the first name is the most important part in being perceived as female or male by name it seems. Middle names are kind of a middle ground thing. I also think a lot of unisex names usually lean towards females. =3 (Mine did anyways usually they seen skylar as female) sometimes it was seen as male but rarely and it's less often seen as unisex.  lol

But thanks I feel a lot better now. I was having a breakdown over it because I just don't want my name screaming male. lol But after reading about dale and ryan it helped a lot! Names are definitely in the individual opinion section.
I'm always looking for more people to chat with! :)
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Valerie Rose

When I was earlier in my transition i used to tell people my name was Val like Val Kilmer. I felt it would make coming out to them easier in the future. As for middle names I thought about using a feminine version of my male middle name, but in the end it just didnt sound right. So that leads me to my point. If the name makes you feel good or sounds good ( lots of parents name children with names that flow together) then i dont see any reason to worry. And OP is right, lots of cultures give female names to males and males names to females. In the middle east its possible to find women with the middle name Mohammed, or the first name Dan.

plus you paid 300$ for a name change! no need to change it again~ the name sounds great to me ;)
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Skylar105

Thanks =) I was just originally worried it's like oh no you have a male middle name so everything screams male. But Alexander could of been a last name because it is common for people to keep their old last name as new middle. (here anyways). Your name is very nice also one of my old best friends was named valerie! =) She was sweet until she found out what I am. lol But mainly all of this came about from my irrational thinking. So I think the first name is mainly the only thing that really matters when being identified.

But you guys are very helpful so I wanted to thank you for the help. =) Because now I'm not thinking badly of the matter!
I'm always looking for more people to chat with! :)
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ImagineKate

Quote from: Skylar105 on December 22, 2014, 04:01:39 PM
Well after doing some more research I've found females that were named Ryan, and dale from birth. They don't get second looks at all. =)

Egads, Ryan is my current name and I hate it. I'm changing it as soon as I can.
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Skylar105

Quote from: ImagineKate on December 22, 2014, 08:30:13 PM
Egads, Ryan is my current name and I hate it. I'm changing it as soon as I can.

I can understand my old name was William. >_< (it was awful.) I'm glad to have changed it officially here in my state they only strike the name out on the birth certificate. (Scratch out the old one.) but I got really lucky and only got one with my new name on it. Guess because I only had a old birth certificate (not the new style here.) lol either way I was lucky. :)
I'm always looking for more people to chat with! :)
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ImagineKate

My birth certificate can't be changed. Legal name changes are a separate piece of paper that you need to keep with your birth certificate. Gender can't be changed either. But I may burn it or surrender it to the consulate in New York when I renounce my other citizenship. I'm so disgusted that they caved to the religious establishment. All my US docs will be correct.
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Skylar105

Goodness gracious that sounds awful. O.o from the post your citizen ship isn't New York is it? Because I never heard of such a thing. Gender can't be changed in my state either (on birth certificate or drivers license.) so I don't get pulled over. Lol if I do I end up having a break down shortly after.
I'm always looking for more people to chat with! :)
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ImagineKate

Quote from: Skylar105 on December 23, 2014, 11:02:34 AM
Goodness gracious that sounds awful. O.o from the post your citizen ship isn't New York is it? Because I never heard of such a thing. Gender can't be changed in my state either (on birth certificate or drivers license.) so I don't get pulled over. Lol if I do I end up having a break down shortly after.

I am from Trinidad and Tobago.

Thankfully in NJ it is not that difficult to change name or gender marker, and my naturalization certificate and US passport can be changed easily as well, without surgery.
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Skyler

Hello Skylar :P Yes i can see what you mean on the unisex part. Lately Iv'e been considering changing my name to Walker so there is no confusion  involved. Also in both aspects of the trans community skylar/skyler is a popular name....hmmm still thinking about it though its gonna be hard for everyone to get it right this time.
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Foxglove

Funny you should bring this up.  I have something of the opposite problem.

When I changed my name, I chose very female names for my first and middle names.  After a while it occurred to me that people who don't know me might question my middle name, especially if they take account of my age and the fact that I have a son.  My three names together don't sound like a typical woman's married name. 

Nobody's asked me about it so far, and I doubt that anybody ever will.  But I decided that if anybody ever does, I'll simply tell them that once my marriage was over, I went back to my full "maiden" name.  (Of course that raises another question: when was I ever a "maiden"?)
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Skylar105

@Skyler I've honestly never seen another with another form of my name on here lol. (I don't look very hard it seems.) Typically though from what I've seen e is typically the form used for male. While a is typically for female (I have seen a few occasions outside of it.) honestly even with my middle name most people assume female because of my middle name being a possible last name. So I still believe mainly the first name is the most important lol.

@Foxglove  I've noticed I am usually more concerned than others about it. :3  I'm still technically glad my middle could of been a last name. (So I could always pull the marriage card even though I'm more alone than most.) I can definitely understand your concern though. :3 As it's like wondering will they ever question it? I don't know if you're like me but I try to avoid being noticed so even my name plays into account on that. But after finding a woman named Ryan and dale that problem kind of went away for me. They said they were never questioned at all which is odd to me lol. (Their parents decided on a unique name.) :3 which is cool to me.
I'm always looking for more people to chat with! :)
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Valerie Rose

Quote from: Skylar105 on December 22, 2014, 05:03:16 PM
Your name is very nice also one of my old best friends was named valerie! =) She was sweet until she found out what I am. lol

I promise to be sweet to you too!...unless you are a vampire, then it's every girl for herself, sorry :'(
LOL~
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Skylar105

@Valerie you won't believe this but she said the exact same thing! LOL ironically I'm allergic to garlic (it sucks) D: it was mainly due to her disbelief in transgender people that ruined mine and her friendship. Her husband was also in the same field as I'm trying to get into. :3 she did always make remarks about me being pale. -.-
I'm always looking for more people to chat with! :)
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PhoenixGurl2016

Hi, I am also thinking about my name. I like the Name Amanda, as well as its meaning. The only thing I fear is be called out as it sounds like A-Man-Duh




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Skylar105

@AmandaDG I wouldn't worry about that problem :) Amanda is a very common name here locally and I doubt they would make fun of you for Amanda being your name. :o
I'm always looking for more people to chat with! :)
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PhoenixGurl2016

Quote from: Skylar105 on December 23, 2014, 10:39:42 PM
@AmandaDG I wouldn't worry about that problem :) Amanda is a very common name here locally and I doubt they would make fun of you for Amanda being your name. :o

Thank you, I very much like my name my name. For my middle name it is Marie, to honor my grandmother who has been like a mother to me.

I always like names with Sky in them like Skyla and of course your name too :)




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Skylar105

Amanda Marie sounds like a very good name to me. :)  it's always nice to honor someone with a name. :3 
I'm always looking for more people to chat with! :)
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Foxglove

Quote from: AmandaDG on December 23, 2014, 09:03:07 PM
I like the Name Amanda, as well as its meaning. The only thing I fear is be called out as it sounds like A-Man-Duh

Hint: don't tell anybody that it sounds like "A-Man-Duh" and it'll never occur to them.  It had never occurred to me until you mentioned it.  But it is a lovely, very feminine name.  "A girl to be loved": absolutely nothing wrong with that.
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