I used to be so asexual that I didn't even have any interest in anything to do with sex. I was even quite a visible figure in the community and as an activist for asexual visibility and acceptance. Well, about two months on hormones put the end to that pretty definitely.

I was always pretty sure that if I was attracted to somebody, it would be women I'd be interested in. In fact, even before I realized I was trans I did think that I might be sexual if I was a woman (and completely missed a pretty damn obvious clue about being trans, I was pretty good at missing those). It was pretty hard to deal with, actually, because it made me feel like one of those creeps who just gets kicks out of girls doing it together, even though I was extremely aware that I was getting the kicks out of the idea of being one of the girls instead of some kind of voyeuristic fantasy.

Here I kind of do blame society because female homosexuality is so fetishised to absurd levels that it's hard to approach the subject at all without feeling guilty about it. It's become easier as I start to accept myself as female more and more, I start to accept myself as a lesbian more and more. But still, it's something I approach with much caution, because the feelings of guilt are still there even though even my lesbian friends hammer to me how I shouldn't. But another part of it also is that I am keenly aware that very large portions of the lesbian community don't accept transwomen, either amongst them or as a concept in general. And even though I usually just do my thing and tell people to shove it, this time it's too sensitive a topic for me.

I'm probably going to wait until after my surgery in any case before becoming sexually active in any way in any case, so I'm still at least two years away from it. But it's surprisingly become one of the more tender topics in my whole process. I have to say that I would've preferred to remain asexual. Life was much more simple back then, even if I did have to explain what it is and convince people that it's really a thing.

I primarily attracted to women, so for practical purposes I go by homosexual / lesbian.

However, if the moon is blue and Venus aligns with Mercury, I can find men attractive, but it is very rare. When I do I find more feminine men attractive, and am noticing their feminine features.

In contrast, I find like 1/4-1/3 of women attractive.

 





I have sex with guys quite often. One of my friends have been intimate quite often. And supposedly I enjoy the sexual contact but in general I don't look at guys. Or really like them. It's just I'm kind of dealing with things from the past that's why I still do have sex with guys. But I think I am a lesbian? Because I'm very confused about my identity. I feel really crazy though saying that because I'm physically male so I'm obviously not completely gay. I'm not a true lesbian. But I really am not attracted to girls as a guy. So I'm not really sure. Something with a preference to females. I'm also physically intersex so I truly feel weird considering myself either.

I like butch women, androgynous women, and even transguys (not to be offensive to transguys by placing them close to those categories... I just feel like they are more relatable, and understanding than cisguys). I would probably date a normie ciswoman before I would a cisman though. I prefer gender nonconformists, just because they're easier to relate with, and understand. 

Quote from: Elsa Delyth on December 27, 2014, 08:32:37 PMtransguys (not to be offensive to transguys by placing them close to those categories...

Yeah I have a bit of this problem as well and see some transmen sexually as women.

Its not something I would ever act on however, as I know that I hate when people are attracted to whatever male traits I have, but I do admit its a thing.

Well I'm having issues with this myself. Admittedly I've only dated guys but I only kissed a girl once, out of curiosity, and found out I liked it tons more. So years later I've never dated a girl, though I do feel a very strong attraction towards women and I'm very shy so its hard for me to ask a girl out. I've dated guys and while they were nice themselves it was weird(ish). I say weirdish because I did partially like it a lot and sometimes I see a guy and think, "Wow he's hot." then I feel confusion as to why I think that. So I guess I'm bi but its too early to tell for sure. Some people say at my age, I'll know. I call that a bunch of horse manure (band teacher phrase lol) and say I'm still learning. So I may be a lesbian (as of now) or I might be bi I really don't know.

Note: Sometimes I look at a guy as though I think he's cute but I'm actually wondering what it's like to be him. As is his gender.

Quote from: Peebles on December 27, 2014, 09:20:59 PM
Yeah I have a bit of this problem as well and see some transmen sexually as women.

Its not something I would ever act on however, as I know that I hate when people are attracted to whatever male traits I have, but I do admit its a thing.

Yeah, makes me feel like a terrible human being... I went out with a transguy once, and kept getting the pronouns wrong, even though they didn't once make the same mistake with me... makes me feel like a hypocrite, and a worse person...

Quote from: Peebles on December 27, 2014, 09:20:59 PM
Yeah I have a bit of this problem as well and see some transmen sexually as women.

Its not something I would ever act on however, as I know that I hate when people are attracted to whatever male traits I have, but I do admit its a thing.

I tend to be attracted to androgynous female born people anyway. Besides one girl. That's mainly what I'm attracted to the thing is I don't consider myself attracted to her a girl only as a female. Which ->-bleeped-<-s up conflicting interests really.

For a while i wasn't sure what sexuality I was. Before I came out as Trans I only dated women but I had feelings for guys plenty of times so I guess I'm Bi.
Things are still kind of confusing tho.

I labelled myself as a lesbian for a long time, before I knew trans* was actually a thing. I now label myself as pansexual though but I wonder if I can really say that. I don't have any sexual attraction to men but could see myself being attracted to them. Women on the other hand, I'm attracted to romantically and sexually. Cis or trans doesn't really matter to me.

I would like to add that my wife is the only person I've been sexual with and she's still pre-op. However, I've never seen her as anything but female so...there's that.

Quote from: wolfduality on December 28, 2014, 08:04:02 PM
I labelled myself as a lesbian for a long time, before I knew trans* was actually a thing. I now label myself as pansexual though but I wonder if I can really say that. I don't have any sexual attraction to men but could see myself being attracted to them. Women on the other hand, I'm attracted to romantically and sexually. Cis or trans doesn't really matter to me.

I would like to add that my wife is the only person I've been sexual with and she's still pre-op. However, I've never seen her as anything but female so...there's that.

what I am about to say has nothing to do with your comment I just like your avatar pic

Quote from: amber roskamp on December 28, 2014, 09:32:30 PM
what I am about to say has nothing to do with your comment I just like your avatar pic

Aww, thanks!

 I'm not really sure where am. I am 56 years old I have only been intimate with one person in my life and I am married to her. I meet my wife when I was 25 she pursued me for weeks till I went out with her.
  When I was in high school I was attracted to both sexes but my internal confusion kept me from getting too close to anyone, a problem I am still trying to deal with. I did have a friend I was very close to and I imagined that he was my boyfriend, never let him know. When he got married his wife hated me, maybe she sensed what I never said. I have not seen him in 20 years but I still think about him all the time. Had a dream last year that I was at a wedding there was a woman there, she was being hassled by some people so I intervened to help her that's when I saw she was my old friend.  Still trying to figure that dream out.

The two men I was in relatively long term relationships with later turned out to be gay, and the woman I was with still identifies as straight. I've selected pansexual. Think potentially I could be attracted to anyone but on experience it does tend to be mainly gay men and women who aren't openly gay.

Tbh, bi - while I like boys, there are some lookers on here :~]

totally pansexual.

When I first started dating as a woman a few months ago, I went into it as a straight female. Through my dating adventures I eventually discovered that gender or sex does not matter to me at all.

It's ALL about the person....the soul behind the eyes.

I think one of the most amazing changes that transition has brought about in me is this: it has opened my heart in ways that I never imagined, and let me experience entirely new levels of beauty and love.

I voted asexual, which is the term I feel comfortable with at the moment. That said, I'm pre-T and pre-everything. And I do find the male figure pleasing, it's more my own body that makes me feel like I don't want to um...interact with anyone like that. I'm starting to think/wonder that if when I start T, transition more, and have less body image issues that I will identify as gay instead.

I have no idea where I stand sexually (I'm inclined to believe I'm either grey-asexual or asexual completely), but I have the capacity to be romantically attracted to any gender. I prefer feminine and female-identifying people, though. To keep it simple, I'd just call myself bisexual.

I am straight with a light bisexual component. I married a woman as man (and we are still married) but after srs I am more attracted to straight guys and I love to have sex with men. Perhaps I am addicted to have sex with men. I could have sex with a woman but in future I prefer men for a relationship.

After trying to find out who I am I would now call me a straight woman.

Lara

More Bi than I used to be Pre-HRT, I'm more curious and sometimes even 'bothered' when I see certain types of guys now. Still overwhelmingly into women

I used to think dating another trans individual wouldnt be for me but after several recent dates with ciswomen I realize personality and compability weigh so much more heavily into if I or the other person want something more. And cis people seem way more apprehensive when you tell them youre trans. Whether its beforehand or a little later, there seems to be no bigger turn off it than that it seems^^