well, to solve my medical condition I would prefer to have the female body cloned from my genes and have my brain transplanted into the clone or just keep on HRT and hope for the best

Quote from: H, H, H, Honeypot! on December 21, 2014, 04:06:04 PM
Given I'm a simpleton I have to keep things simple otherwise I confuse myself.  "Hi, I'm Rosie" is about as much description as I ever give anyone.

I've often categorized myself as "a <lastname>." That makes me unique, even if my last name is actually quite common.

I've tended to think about myself as "A man with a female body," which, to me, has some subtle differences from the "born in the wrong body" paradigm.  It emphasizes that this is my body, and it's biologically female, and that neither my body nor my mind are "wrong", nor necessarily incongruent except that culture sees them as such. For myself, I don't know how much I would want to change my body if the gendered cultural expectations attached to it were different.  It's mostly the desire to have my social role and my gender be congruent that drives me. I don't think it's possible for the mind and the body to ever be 100% congruent.

Then again, not a day goes by that I'm not surprised by the degree of my body dysphoria.  So my current model of gender variance may well be influenced by repression and denial 

Well depends on how I'm asked. If someone tries telling me something like, "God made you that way and He made you as you are" I say, "Exactly. God made my life a little harder than some, gave me a little harder obstacle course I go through, and He made me a man. Just my dads sperm and moms egg couldn't agree on that."

If someone asks me just why I usually say, "I guess I always knew I was a boy."

Now if I'm joking with friends or a friend asks me I sometimes say, "Maybe my dads sperm knew my mom was gonna have two boys and thought to give her a girl to be fair."

Quote from: Arch on December 16, 2014, 09:38:04 AM
Folks, this is a description thread, not an explanation thread. How do you describe yourself and see yourself? Not "how did you get this way?" because that question does seek causes.

If you don't think the "born in the wrong body" paradigm is a good explanation, that's because it cannot really function as an explanation for our condition. "Oh, there were a bunch of empty bodies floating around, and my consciousness accidentally slipped into one" doesn't quite cut it as a cause for how we are. But so many people outside of the trans community--and some within--describe themselves as born into the wrong body (an apparent effect from whatever cause), so I was wondering how many people here use that same description for themselves.

I think of it kind of like this–my body is not me, it's mainly a means of conveyance (other things too, ofc, but it's still not where my consciousness exists)..  Since my body and assigned gender role at birth were in conflict with my mind/consciousness/who I am at my core, I just think of it as being born in the wrong body for this mind/consciousness I do have.  That's why, tho simplistic, I kind of feel it is a good explanation for me.

Natalie I love your answer, that is exactly how I view it. From the first time my neighbors two girls had talked me into playing dress up I knew something was a miss because I loved being made up and dressed as a girl. It was like a tingly calming feeling came over my body. Even when we showed their moms and they said I made s cute girl, without think in a girls voice I said thank you and courtesied.

Quote from: Rudy King on November 23, 2014, 04:53:36 AM
I was born in the right body, just wrong plumbing and lower parts.

I guess I should clarify.  I'm Intersex.
Although I'm male, I have a girls body.  Just with male junk.   
Right body, wrong junk.

I can't claim I AM (1) a female born in the wrong body. But for as long as I can remember I had a huge desire to be female. This is way before puberty, so there wasn't a sexual element to it. Being female just *fits* my nature better, I suppose.

(1) sorry for the edit - it's Friday night - I've had a few

Quote from: amber roskamp on November 09, 2014, 10:41:56 AM

If i was asked if i could change the way i was born, i wouldn't have a sure answer. Being born with female parts would have changed how i was raised. it would have changed my whole life. im not sure where i would be, and that sounds terrifying.

I am alive. i am proud of myself for being the person i want to be. I know i will be happier after i transition, and i am comfortable with that. that's all i need.

I really like this sentiment.  I've always said every decision I've made has resulted in the person I am now.  Change any one decision, who knows what else changes?   Even going into repression mode meant I was able to have my daughter who is the light of my life.

I have never liked the ol' "women trapped in a man's body," but I never knew exactly why.  This thread has cleared some of that up.

Good topic.

It's mostly experiential to me. Of course, the experiences I have affect my quality of life and happiness, so its a big deal.

Basically only a fraction of *who* I was, felt congruent with *what* I was, and I let it go for a very long time. Mainly because I was unaware of the options. I know I started investigating as soon as I realised I *had* options ...

Nonetheless my experience of life was *mostly* internalised, expressing it was mostly out of the question. That over time became pathological and in many ways the old me was just kinda dying.

Anyhow its all been turned upside down - a bit like flipping an hourglass, where every small thing about me is a grain of sand. Now I am *all* me, *all* the time, and its like something out of a fantasy.

I really do feel like I have a second chance at life. It's impossible to feel regret :~)

my (cis) dad has always had a testosterone deficiency - it was passed down to me, though in a more extreme form this time.

i was born closer to the gender line than some.i knew something wasnt right but i was in a family where it just wasnt possible to mention it.as i grew up i felt most comfortable with the girls who were tomboys,i felt that was my place. body wise and feeling wise i came to accept i had female feelings and a body dysphoria. its hard been different from the accepted transgender but its how i am. as you all know its a feeling deep inside that you cant switch off. its about being content. at first i worried i wouldnt "pass" but now im finding out where i fit.the only way i can describe where i feel comfortable is if you imagine a trans man who has decided to de transition.the gender spectrum is odd like that. there used to be a tv series called quantum leap where a guy jumped about in time but jumped into other peoples bodies.i remember watching that and thinking i feel like that.im me always will be but bits are wrong.

For me, it isn't so much "wrong body" as it feels like I just developed wrong.  I had a birth defect on my genitals that had to be repaired when I was young, but ever since, every few years, I've needed to have maintenance done to fix problems that would come up.  And it's like... maybe it's the whole thing that's the defect.  Or maybe I just have too much testosterone and that explains the hair everywhere.  But it doesn't feel like the "wrong body" per se.  Just that certain parts did't come out right.

The rest of it feels sociological.  Because I had this defect, I was raised to be a certain way, to act a certain way, to wear certain kinds of clothes and live up to certain expectations.  That because I have these defects, I was taught a completely different way to be, much of it never felt right.  And in that process, the girl I should have been allowed to become got locked away in a dark box of secrets, hidden under the bed.  She screams inside of me.  She screams so loud and so desperate, and she doesn't even remember why she got locked away.  And because she never got to grow up, my growth has been stunted.  My ability to cope with everything is limited.  My willingness just to get up and out of bed everyday, to simply exist, has been worn down to nubs.  I don't actually want to live.  For years, I've only just been waiting to die.

She cries, just wanting to be held and loved by every girl she's ever dreamed of.  Every girl she's ever wanted to be, to be with, and hates this thing I've turned her into.  It's not her body that scares her, anymore.  It's that it's become her prison.  She's not in control.  Everyone else's expectations for her body is, because her body doesn't match X Y and Z.  She might even be able to live with the parts that don't always work, the hair that's everywhere that makes her feel gross and ugly.  But she can't live in that world where, "no, you can't wear that.  That's girls' clothes," anymore.  "No, you can't call yourself Daria, that's a girl's name".  "No, you can't want this or that, because you're a boy". 

No, I'm not a boy.  I don't want to be a boy.  And I also think that, as a girl, I have a right to have short hair if I want.  Or wear comfortable shoes.  Or have sexual thoughts and feelings for other women.  But that's my choice.  I want to be able to express my femininity as it feels right to me.  As a boy, I'm not allowed to do any of that.  I'm still at a point where I talk about myself in the third person, sometimes, because that's how this feels.  Because I haven't been allowed to be me for so long, she feels like someone else. 

"being in the wrong body" is just a very uncomplex way of explaining a very complex thing, an experience that isn't as universal as the narrative trope suggests.  The truth is, at least for me, it's a contention of an entire identity, that everything I'm "supposed to be" stands in opposition to everything I actually am.  And the line blurs on who actually sees it and who doesn't.  When I was young, it was like everyone else saw it but me.  But nowadays, I'm the only one who knows, no matter how loud that little girl inside of me screams out in everything I do.  And all I want to do sometimes is ask, "if you all saw me acting like a girl when I was young, why didn't you just let me BE one?"  Now, I want to be one so bad, it crushes me, and I don't have the first clue how.  I don't even know what questions to ask, and the ones I do feel so clunky and complicated. 

I wish it was just as simple as "being in the wrong body".  It denotes something that could be fixed with a few procedures.  It's more like someone twisted my soul like some kind of balloon animal, and I don't even begin to know how to get it all untied.  I may never get it all untangled.  I may never be "fixed".  I may never know how to.

I know this is a little off topic but I will explain something that might have a bearing on GID.
My sister happen to lose an eye when she was young then she got a transplant now here is where it gets odd. This has been know to happen with others with organ transplant but basically some of the personality of the donor organ can pass to the recipient. My mom told me that my sister did act a little different after the transplant and really today she is more tomboyish but not dysphoric about it either.

Long story short much earlier someone said the wrong brain well some validity to it ya more the wrong body since its the brain that thinks but it Is possible that the body itself does have a bearing on ones personality. So that brings me to how the heck does that pertain to GID well maybe its a lot more something that happened with the DNA or something that is miss-matched.

Whatever the cause matters little just something happened and nature goofed time to fix it and be you true self body and soul. I know I had put this simply an daria happen to post just second before me but what she had said yes I agree with that 100%. Its the soul and if we can at least in some shape or form get closer to our true self all the better if that makes sense and by no means is that any simple matter. The way I look at the Xn vs Y thing well that's like saying the world is black and white what about the grey:)

Personally after I have looked into trans I have learnt that ya I am one now the next step is correction whatever that be. Keep reading things on this site that its like omg that's me and starting to see things in my really young childhood. I had guess always aspired to be female yet not born as such so had to deal with what I was dealt now though i have found I can change that and why not if it doesn't hurt anyone etc. Really at the point starting to not care why or what caused it but how and when the change will occur and the who is me:)

One side note dang it Jill F not sure how you put things always short simple yet very honest and true keep that up:)

I think it is basically an issue where the brain doesn't match the the rest of the body and it is much more simple to make the rest of the body right than to change the structure of the brain to match the rest of the body. There is a social aspect to it, where not only do we have the wrong body, but we also have been socialized as the wrong gender (with the exception of transgender children raised in accepting families), so many of us have still have mannerisms, speech patterns, and ways of interacting with the world that are stereotypical of he wrong gender. There is nothing innately wrong with this, but it can be a dysphoria trigger (for me at least), and makes passing difficult and requires a lot of work to overcome. My name for it is "raised by wolves syndrome"

I was born in the right body to be transgender   I identify and describe myself as transgender and likely always will.  The rest of the world may describe me as they see it but i feel we are clearly not limited to our external appearance.

I see the 'birth defect' interpretation is popular. It's not how I feel personally, however.

The way I see it, my body beforehand was perfect. It was what it was, did what it did. Being born biologically male was not a defect in itself.

My frame could have carried almost any male stereotype. Labourer, truck driver, wrestler, bodybuilder, action movie hero - you name it.
---

My issue was that *who* I am did not fit.

While I couldn't change *who* I am - I could change *what* I was.

So, once I knew the option was there, the decision was easy.

ill let you know when i find out. im at the start of a journey which i decided had no preconceived ideas so i can become myself. guessing that a level of transition will cure my dysphoria just isnt for me ill know when i get there.