Quote from: Evelyn K on February 08, 2015, 07:12:30 AM
(waves)

Hi all. Long time no see. 

Katrina makes a good point. A stern face is a more masculine face! Grin's lift and it's a feminine trait.

Check this out 

Bwahahahaha!!! Thanks I needed this LOL! Well, we all do sometimes haha! <3 this!!

Evelyn... love the video... I certainly am very aware of my natural face, and have to think "smile/grin" all the time... duno why as a few years ago I was always referred to as smiley? what a turnaround.... but am grinning writing this 

Added... and the second one... and yes noticed, don't feel so bad now 

L Katy

I like to use a little eye shadow, to hep with my fem look.  Almay has some eye colored based sets.  You get a light color for the top, a medium color for the lid, and a dark color to accent the crease.  My only advise is to keep it subtle and not color up to the brow, and use some light on the inside of the eye to help make the eyes look wider and more feminine.  No man would be caught dead wearing eye shadow, so this will help with the "Sirs" and it's available from your local CVS/Target/Walmart, so no special trip required. 

-Alana

When I went full time without any hair removal or HRT and living in an area where I was fairly well known it was torture. I was mis gendered nearly every day and because of this I feel you pain. As others have said the beard shadow won't be helping and maybe neither is unstyled hair but I honestly believe the biggest thing you can do to help yourself is work on your confidence. If you go do some people watching and concentrate on the women you may notice how many of them just exude natural rhythm and flow to everything they do. I thought long and hard like you've been doing about what I was doing wrong. Having a poor wig and bad make up wasn't helping me but the other thing I did was when I was out the house I was so concerned about who was next going to be rude or insulting that I forgot to be natural and therefore drew attention to myself. I know it's hard to be confident when things are going badly but if you can get yourself into the mindset of seeing the progress you've made and the good things that are to come I'm sure that will help.

The more you get out as Kate and practice the more confident you'll become, I think Grace also hit the nail on the head. Work on emphasising some of your better feminine features so that the first glance tells people they are interacting with a female and this too will help. I never used to leave the house in jeans or pants always a skirt or dress and I wouldn't go out without make up. As times past I have become confident enough to wear jeans and only wear make up on days when I'm going to meet someone or will be out for a long period of time. I mostly now pass I think. I became stubborn, "My passport says I'm female and so does my drivers licence so these fools can think what they want, Whatever they think they cannot alter that my name is Sorcha and I've not met many men with that name" That's what I told myself each time I was insulted and in time I managed to get better.

I hope things get better for you but at least you know you have support on here and that is better than no support at all

Hugs

Sorcha 

Well Kate's happy again.

First off I lost weight!

Secondly I was in Walmart. Almost had a fight with my wife after she wanted me to take my son to the men's restroom. I'm done with the men's restroom even in male mode. I use the family restroom in male mode. I can't keep switching back and forth.

Well I was barely in male mode today but whatever.

Well I was pushing my cart in their crowded valentine section, then saw a cart I pushed it aside gently. An employee came up, took the cart and said, "ma'am let me get that out of your way." Really? Cool. I think I just had a male fail.

So I'm getting happy again. I think as well with the change in meds and my hormones I may have had some moodiness and General crappy feeling because of that but it's settling down.

Quote from: ImagineKate on February 10, 2015, 07:53:46 PM
Well Kate's happy again.

Well I was pushing my cart in their crowded valentine section, then saw a cart I pushed it aside gently. An employee came up, took the cart and said, "ma'am let me get that out of your way." Really? Cool. I think I just had a male fail.

So I'm getting happy again. I think as well with the change in meds and my hormones I may have had some moodiness and General crappy feeling because of that but it's settling down.

I've never heard the term male fail before but it made me laugh I think meds can make us do things we normally wouldn't and it doesn't take much to make us doubt so you go with the happy thoughts I'm sure that will make allot of situations seem better. I'm sure having a disapproving wife isn't helping you feel great either. I had one of them once and it made an already miserable me feel a whole lot worse. manys the time I couldn't wait to get back to work especially when I had a 10 day tour to do

Hugs

Sorcha 

Yeah so I began some new meds for diabetes a couple of weeks ago and went full strength this week. I was told it could mess with my hormones a bit. I was having PMS-y type symptoms definitely sans cramps (no uterus), a massive migraine plus I was darned irritable and feeling bloated. Not to mention I was pretty much a bitch to everyone... Glad that's over with for now!

More WIN today. Shaving this morning and some of the hair was sliding out. So I guess my lasered hair is finally shedding!

I go for my makeover early next week after I get paid.

Quote from: ImagineKate on February 11, 2015, 09:04:41 AM
More WIN today. Shaving this morning and some of the hair was sliding out. So I guess my lasered hair is finally shedding!

I go for my makeover early next week after I get paid.

Yeah!!  I know that you're going to <3 <3 <3  love it

-Alana

Quote from: ImagineKate on February 11, 2015, 09:04:41 AM
More WIN today. Shaving this morning and some of the hair was sliding out. So I guess my lasered hair is finally shedding!

I go for my makeover early next week after I get paid.

All right! nice  .. I bet it was not the laser ... it was my glow  , I glowed so bright it melted your face hair off  And now you are glowing!

-Jade

YAY!!!! happy for you Kate hugs hugs

While you're waiting for the rest of your laser treatments, you could try using a coral or salmon colored concealer over the beard shadow and then just a tinted moisturizer over top if you don't feel like doing full-on make up. I am an SO, but I am make up obsessed and I help my wife with hers all the time. I found that treating the shadow like under eye circles worked well, since the color you're trying to cover up is pretty much the same.

What works best on her is a redness reducing BB cream, salmon concealer around the beard area and then a regular liquid foundation on top with a matte setting powder. I know that seems like a lot of steps, but it works really well. The products I use on her are Sonia Kashuk Hidden Agenda Concealer Pallette (available at Target), L'Oreal BB Cream Anti-Redness, L'Oreal True Match Liquid Foundation and NYX Matte Setting Powder. All fairly inexpensive, even though I have to get the NYX at Ulta, it's still comparable to drug-store brands in price.

Also, as far as make up tutorials go, I think Kandee Johnson (https://www.youtube.com/user/kandeejohnson) has some great videos on youTube where she explains things well and makes them easy to follow and also gives product suggestions at every price range.

Hope that helps!  -Kat

Thanks Kat. Makeup is something I need to at least get down. I am horrible and when I try I end up looking like a bad version of the joker.

Well I did get ma'amed today but in an unusual place - in my kids school by one of the teaching assistants. It's weird because she knows me. I wasn't really presenting femme but I kind of didn't really hide much (with a sweater) as I usually do. I had to pick up my daughter. I went to the class and was tending to her then she turned to me and said, ma'am here is her book bag. Then she seemed to catch herself. Probably a lucky fluke or maybe she is dropping a hint that she knows (I've been going "Jenner style" to the school).

Whatever I will take it.

I also found that as the upper lip hair falls off it looks hugely different. Wow. I never saw this from electrolysis because it was swollen plus she only did part at a time (time constraint plus she didn't want to heat up my face too much). I'm liking laser! Just wish the hairs would all fall out already...

  Great to see its all coming together and you're back, on form Kate 
Love to see you happier again...

L Katy 

Yeah I'm definitely more upbeat now! Although I did meet a rude manager at Burger King today who was bossing around the female employees like they were little children and proceeded to give me a hard puzzled look, followed by "sir" but I was in male drag anyway. Ah well.

Quote from: ImagineKate on February 12, 2015, 10:10:45 PM
Thanks Kat. Makeup is something I need to at least get down. I am horrible and when I try I end up looking like a bad version of the joker.

You're welcome! Makeup has never been something that came easy to me either, even being a cis woman. My mother loathes makeup for its "sexual" connotations (she has unresolved issues, but I digress). So I didn't get any help from her growing up. I had to learn from friends at school and hide my makeup for the longest time, only putting it on when I was out of the house. Once I was on my own and had better access to the wonders of the internet, I started watching tutorial videos all the time and just kept trying different things until I found a routine and a look that worked for me.

You'll get it down, practice makes perfect! Also, good to hear you're getting Ma'amed without trying!

Wheeeeee

I got "clocked" today at the DMV.

I don't have my new ID yet and it's still male. Travel plans are forcing me to delay my name change.

Anyhow, I went to get one of the car registrations renewed. I went dressed up androgyne/femme but I did put on light foundation and lip gloss. Not the pink one, but a more darker red.

Went up to the receptionist, he greets me so kindly and gently unlike the guys who were ahead of me; one of whom had a suspended license. Directed me to the express lane. Genderless so far.

Clerk said, "ma'am I will take you over here." Yay!

Ok so she asks for my paperwork and DL. She looks at my DL, then looks at me. Looks again and then looks back. Then she just shakes her head in frustration, then suddenly says to herself, "oh, now I get it."

LOL.

She did not call me sir. She just printed my paperwork, I swiped my Amex and she said have a nice day.

Quote from: ImagineKate on February 23, 2015, 12:55:27 PM
Wheeeeee

I got "clocked" today at the DMV.

I don't have my new ID yet and it's still male. Travel plans are forcing me to delay my name change.

Anyhow, I went to get one of the car registrations renewed. I went dressed up androgyne/femme but I did put on light foundation and lip gloss. Not the pink one, but a more darker red.

Went up to the receptionist, he greets me so kindly and gently unlike the guys who were ahead of me; one of whom had a suspended license. Directed me to the express lane. Genderless so far.

Clerk said, "ma'am I will take you over here." Yay!

Ok so she asks for my paperwork and DL. She looks at my DL, then looks at me. Looks again and then looks back. Then she just shakes her head in frustration, then suddenly says to herself, "oh, now I get it."

LOL.

She did not call me sir. She just printed my paperwork, I swiped my Amex and she said have a nice day.

I would not call this "being clocked" . It is just kinda inevitable in those situations when You have to show some officials papers - people have their own impression having set first, then they get to see Your papers and then there is that moment of confusion (I am getting this at postal office, banks, any public institution) - sometimes they just keep switching between face and ID, sometimes they ask "is this Your ID/is that You?" and then just proceed with suspicious look. I am just trying to rolling with it - it was kinda funny in the beginning, now it becomes a bit annoying and I just do some mental "roll eyes" when this happens .

Yeah hence why I used "clocked" in quotes, lol.

It was reaffirming that she'd be confused. I used to get that a lot but something happened and it stopped. Now that I have a new look I'm getting some people confused again.

I try to avoid using credit cards for this reason. I use apple pay where I can.

Good to hear

Also note that sometimes when you think your clocked, your not. Sometimes people just don't pay attention. Today after taking my father in law to the doctor we stopped by Duncan Donuts for some coffee. The woman behind the counter ma'amed me. Then the guy that was making the coffee and never looked up at me, but called me sir because I'm very tall and he just guess male by height alone that he could see out of the corner of his eye. When he finally looked up at me, he had this shocked look on his face like, "my god, your a woman." This has happened to me before and they apologize with a "Oh, I'm sorry ma'am, wow your tall." This guy was speechless and turned about 4 shades of red. Someone might assume I was clocked, but in reality it was just someone not paying attention to detail.