Lot's of advice and different perspectives since last I posted. I don't want to seem a bore by saying the same thing again but the woman really really wasn't trying to be nasty. She thought I was a man inadvertently going into the wrong changing rooms. It hit me hard because I honestly thought this is as good as I get and it's not good enough. Anyway, the next day I tried yet harder stuck on a hat just for fun and thought,  that actually looks alright in a strange kind of way, a bit Miss Marples but hey; and had a wee fun photo shoot (new image pic). I then visited friends who said all the right things; and tomorrow I'm venturing into cocktail world where Glasgow's beautiful people hang out.
Anyway, thanks folks. You are a joy and have been more helpful than I can describe.

Passing is a complicated subject for transwomen because attitude is critical. But at the same time, as Auroramarianna notes, actual looks, mannerisms, and voice have direct impact too.

I've met transwomen who were very nervous, very self conscious, yet otherwise visually should have passed and yet didn't. I have met women who are borderline in many respects (myself, face, til I complete FFS) but who get accepted because we just go about our business fully believing we should be where and who we are.

The reason confidence matters to transwomen and not cisgender women is because transwomen are often unlearning a mass of things pounded into them as "males" and rapidly learning new things that cisgender women have already culturally absorbed, often over the course of decades. Confidence becomes that bridge, but I do agree with Auroramarianna - if our looks, mannerisms, appearance, and voice aren't right to start, no amount of confidence will fix that.

Confidence is the icing on the cake. But first you do have to bake the cake.

Quote from: LizMarie on February 26, 2015, 03:04:29 PM
Confidence is the icing on the cake. But first you do have to bake the cake.

Love that.

Well looking at your profile pic you most certainly don't look male, no way! It's actually a very cute photo. I dont know why you were misgendered and yes it knocks you back for a while but you get over it and it sounds like you already have. I just wanted to add one other thing. Changes from HRT certainly don't fizzle out at 20 months, its only the beginning. Yes there are some early ones in the first few months but a lot of the more subtle changes take a lot longer.  Everyone is different. In my case I've been on HRT for almost two years now and it seems like they come and go, i.e slow change for a while and then plateau for a while and then they pick up again which is what seems to be happening now. At least thats my experience. You have everything to look forward to!