You know how something seems like a grand idea until the reality sets in?  Well that's where I'm at right now.  I knew I wanted FFS.  I knew what it could do for me.  I committed and paid and pushed myself not to chicken-out.  But it's really happening now and it's scheduled for tomorrow morning!!! (May 13th)  I'm not totally freaking out, mind you, but it feels crazy that at three years into my transition it's suddenly actually happening.

  I want this so badly but I also know it's going to be brutal afterwards and I can't even know how that's going to feel until I wake up in the thick of it all hacked apart and stapled back together like Frankenstein!  The difference between how I feel today and how I'll feel immediately post-op is like day and nightmarish black night.  The only way I can handle this is the hope I'll look like a human being again in a month or so.  Sigh... this is really gonna suck!

  Anyway, enough crazy-talk.  This is the last major hurdle I feel I have to leap over in my transition and everything else should be easier after this.  I've traveled to Montreal for the services of Dr. Eric Bensimon on the recommendation of Dr. Brassard.  The plan is only involving nose and brow-bone work so my recovery shouldn't be as 'horrific' as I may have implied.  It's still going to be tough but I'm going to be brave (she says, somewhat naively) and I'm going to get through this.  Hopefully I'll feel up to keeping an eye on the forums over the next few days.  If I'm not around for a bit, you'll understand why!

Trust me when you wake up tomorrow after surgery and everything is calm and peaceful, you'll mentally be in a better place. I had more work than you done, because I had chin work I couldn't feel my mouth much at all, and that was rubbish, but I was surprisingly pain free and all the nerves and worries about having surgery had gone. The recovery does get boring after a few weeks but if you aren't having any incisions inside your mouth, at least you'll still be able to enjoy food!

Good luck for tomorrow and let us know how it goes 😊

Good luck and I hope all goes well.

Good Luck I hope all goes well for you and that the results will be everything you want them to be

The first thing I said when I woke up in post-op recovery was "I'm so Happy!" I had scalp advancement, type 3 forehead reconstruction, rhinoplasty, and mid cheek lift to enhance my cheekbones. The pain was very manageable especially since I had a personal pain medicine pump connected for the night, then the next day I was up and walking around the floor with no problem.  One thing that really helped with the swelling was 2x2 gauze pads soaked in ice water and placed over my eyelids frequently for the first couple of days; my doctor also prescribed arnica montana tablets which seemed to help.  Anyway, you've waited a long time for FFS, so try to think positive thoughts, and I wish you all the best tomorrow, and a speedy recovery

  Thanks, everyone!   And to Squircle in particular for responding first - I always appreciate the sensible and matter-of-fact way you address things.

  I think I'm feeling okay about it now.  I always get more anxious about anything in the mornings so it'll get a bit tough again tomorrow but I should be fine.  Truly just can't believe I've made it this far and I'm ecstatic even at the same time as being worried.  I'll be sure to follow up here again with my experiences.

The time before surgery can be nerve wrecking however try to relax and remember that the gains will be so worth it in the end. Good FFS procedures can bring a whole new level of female privilege that can be hard to believe till you experience it yourself!

I was never really nervous for surgery as I knew I would not be awake at the time post surgery is just something that has to be pushed through remembering the end game to keep the strength and will in check !

Good luck !

  Well, the deed is done now.  I finally felt I could handle a little internetting so I figured I should update.

  Everything went well and healing is proceeding faster than expected.  Once my mental energy is restored enough I will post detail of the experience.  For now I'm purely focused on resting.  This has been a very draining period and I don't feel I'll be able to move on to any kind of peace with the change in my appearance until I'm better-healed.  The stitches, staples and nose splint come off Wednesday.  Once that's done I'll finally gain my sense of freedom.

Congratulations! I hope everything turns out beautifully and you are super happy with the results!!!

I wish you a quick recovery and a sexy look 

I wish that I could afford FFS. I'm not passing to 100% today.

  Thanks again gals!  Charlotte, it looks like we've been on a similar transition schedule.  I see your FFS turn is also coming up very soon.  Best of luck with recovery and your own "sexy look".   You'll have a very understanding audience in me when you report back.  The most important thing is to rest and not stress.  Also, if you're staying in a hotel immediately afterward, invest in an ice bag from a pharmacy.  It seems to have worked wonders in relief and recovery for me.  Plus, hotels typically have an endless supply of free ice.

Violet, indeed it's about the same schedule. I'm praying for a good result every day!

I am totally stressing out now so I'll be running out of stress after the surgery! I'm staying at an airbnb selected based on the size of the freezer so I won't run out of icecubes

I'll let you know how it goes for me! Keep us updated with your progress!!