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Kinda lost

Started by nitrogen1, May 31, 2015, 02:28:02 AM

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nitrogen1

Hi guys
Kinda lost with what's happening with me and I need some help.
I'm a male at birth but For the past couple of years I've been very interested in dressing up as a girl.
I do have a girlfriend and it's going great and I am attracted to girls but I don't mind having anal. I've played with anal for years and that doesn't bother me but I find myself wanting to buy more feminine stuff.
I feel the want to be sexy, but guy clothes are not that sexy and yet again I still am attracted to females.

Just really confused about it all! Could it just be a phase that I am exploring my sexuality very late? I'm 27.

Thanks
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Mariah

Hi Nitrogen. Welcome to Susan's. It's never to late to explore anything that includes gender and sexuality. There is nothing wrong with wanting to feel that way and be attracted to females too. Yes, it is possible that is just a phase and there is good chance that it isn't but you will figure that out in time possibly with the help of others. I look forward to seeing you around the forums. Good luck and Hugs.
Mariah

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If you have any questions, please feel free to ask me.
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nitrogen1

Thanks for the welcome
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katrinaw

Welcome Nitrogen1 to Susan's

Lovely to have you here...

Gender identity can hit at anytime... There are no rules! For some its early in life others later...

Whether you just like wearing clothes of the opposite gender or need fulfilment in life as the opposite gender are all aspects of gender questioning.

Look forward to seeing you about the forums...

L Katy  :-*
Long term MTF in transition... HRT since ~ 2003...
Journey recommenced Sept 2015  :eusa_clap:... planning FT 2016  :eusa_pray:

Randomly changing 'Katy PIC's'

Live life, embrace life and love life xxx
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Dena

We all have a different calendar as to when we see treatment. I knew what was wrong when I entered puberty. I stated treatment at age 23 and had surgery at age 30. My roommate started treatment around age 50 after three marriages. The most important part of treatment is therapy and once you start that, the medication will come. Much of the development that takes place with hormones may not be reversible by stopping the hormones so it's important you see someone long enough that you can get a little clearer view of what you are. Most of the time, the hormones are pretty quick in coming so don't worry to much about a few sessions delaying you forever.
It isn't a phase and it's important you explore it now. I have seen far to many people who change their mind, get married and then have to face this with a partner and children.
Another poster helping another person put up something wonderful that may help you. Go to youtube and request "The transition channel"  and you should get several videos that will give you a good deal to think about. I suspect you will see that you do have a well defined medical condition that needs to be addressed. If I can be of anymore help, let me know.

Where are my manors ;)
Welcome to Susans and have a great day.
Rebirth Date 1982 - PMs are welcome - Use [email]dena@susans.org[/email] or Discord if your unable to PM - Skype is available - My Transition
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nitrogen1

Hi dena thanks for the feedback

I don't think I'm at that stage yet. I love having sex with women but I really love dressing up. Not sure if this is something long term or not just wondering if it's normal or talk to someone in the same situation.
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Jacqueline

Nitrogen,

I am more along the lines of Dena's room mate. Only just realized at 50. However, I struggled with cross dressing since I was 9 or so. I think the interest to cross dress is not really that unusual a few times. However, if it has been with you and seems to keep coming back, chances are it will never completely go away.

Transgender is such a huge umbrella term that it covers a lot of ground. It is okay to be unsure. Especially at your age. A therapist might help. Just because you are sexually oriented to women does not preclude you from being transgender, anywhere on it's spectrum.

Many cross dressers are happy being a man but like to dress in women's clothes some of the time.  Then when they have done that are happy to go back to work and their lives as a man.

It has taken me till now to realize that dressing up does not have to be a sexual kink. I only recently embraced the realization that I never like to go back to the man role. I am still doing it outwardly but don't like it.

I am not saying you have to come down on one side or another right now. I am saying there is a lot of variation. it is  a little confusing and easy to get lost(my wife asked lately, " So if you are really a female deep down, but you want to stay with me, does that make you gay?) Try to keep a sense of humour, an open mind, a sense of wonder  and explore. It's okay to be lost for a little while. It lets you see a place you've never been before. Look around and ask for help when you need it.

You are not alone. Many here started  questioning in ways like you. But everyone's path is different.

With warmth,

Joanna
1st Therapy: February 2015
First Endo visit & HRT StartJanuary 29, 2016
Jacqueline from Joanna July 18, 2017
Full Time June 1, 2018





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Jake25

You don't really need a label unless you want one. Just do what you enjoy. Find a woman that is into men crossdressing. I'm sure there's one out there somewhere. Maybe a bisexual or pansexual girl or a trans woman would like the idea. There are endless possibilites.
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nitrogen1

thanks! that really reassured me rather than putting pressure on labelling myself atm.
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