Melanie, Congrats, sit back and enjoy the ride. Hugs
Mariah

Emily
Have you notice any changes to your skin getting softer?
Thank you
Melanie



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Thank you Mariah
I will!


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Hi Melanie;
Yes Low dose does shrink the prostate (well it did in my case) and definitely shrinks the testicles. As I indicated in my original post though is that over time at least for mer I had the dysphoria break out again. As my doctor and therapist explained as my T levels were depressed, the body gets used to the Oestrogen and depending on your level of dysphoria you can get the breakouts occurring. Each time it did my Doctor increased my dosage. Obviously I cannot say what level, but suffice to say that I take 1 tablet twice a day. This seems to keep the dysphoria at bay for me, but it has seemed to speed up the feminisation process. Just in the last month I have had a bunch of  friends comment on how good my complexion is and how soft and radiant my face looks, one woman friend who doesn't know said that she was amazed at how relaxed I looked and that I appeared to have a much younger look. Another man reckoned I looked 10 years younger.  Someone also commented on how I had a sort of dewy look to my face. The downside now is that I reckon I am probably on the cusp or just over the cusp between a low dose and a transition dose, because my work focus, drive and energy/competitiveness seems to have slipped a gear or somewhat, which has without a doubt affected my work. So depending on your decision you will have to weigh up  the need to quell the dysphoria and become suitably feminized, with ones need to earn a living. Of course like many in my ideal world, I would happily fill a housewife role and loved to be looked after by a partner without the worries of having to perform in the commercial world, but unfortunately at my stage in life I doubt if that will ever be a reality. If it ever did, I would happily throw in the towel so as to speak and move rapidly to have BA and BBL to really help me present as 100% female.

I agree with Judith.

It's very easy to drift into ever higher dosages, but it must be tempered by your own intentions.  Are you on low dose to reduce dysphoria to avoid transition?
Or is it for starting a long slow stealth transition?

Personally, I have drifted from low dose to what is effectively a low transition dose, even though my actual pellet dose is half or under compared to what my endo usually gives to those transitioning.

Mentally I feel great - emotionally I'm falling more and more on the female side of things.  Physically, fortunately my changes have been very gradual - I'd be frustrated if I were transitioning, but they are sufficient for me to be careful with clothing selection.

Congrats Emily and Melanie. I hope to hear from you often.

A funny story to follow-up with judithlynn's comment about looking younger. I was a parent-teacher conference last winter. The next day two teachers cornered my son and asked him how old I was. They undershot their original guess by a good number of years. I had to smile when my son told me about it. Hormones are powerful even at low doses.

Luna,

I remember you saying that E is addictive, well i have only been 5 weeks on the lowest dosage and I already feel that I need to go the the lowest trasitioning dosage.  I want to see my body change drastically!

Melanie,

Yes the skin is getting softer, but not only that, I feel more pleasure touching my skin that before. Now I know why women are always touching their legs, it feels sensual.

One week to my therapist appointment and 7 more weeks to the endo appointment.  Let see what she changes dosage wise!

Emily

Also agreeing with what Judith is saying....

In my case I have always been on a lowish level; after a few months, all those years ago, my genitals and my testicles shrank, then my testicles started to move up and out of view after about a year and a half.

My T counts are low (were too low) but now sit around the 1 to 2 mark... E levels are around the 250 to 280 mark on average... so happy with the way things are behaving...

Also I still have to present in male form whilst trying to regain a successful role after over a year out of IT, so its back, for now, to suppressing my FT goals until settled (My worklife history is important to me obtaining a new role, but once a reasonable time has passed I can engage the FT transitioning topic with whoever I get employed by! but being selective there too  )

L Katy 

Thanks everyone for your feedback and comments. They mean so much since I am now starting the next part of the journey.

Like many I am starting on a low dose to feel better mentally and to minimize the affects. Even thou Connecticut has transgender protection I need to get through the next three years and get my twin daughters through college with no interruptions in employment. Also I want to ease into this even thou I feel transition is in my future at so point.

Call me crazy but I felt calmer after taking the first dose. That is during the first full day. That tension that I always feel is starting to minimize.

I am glad to hear the candid feed back and do expect the dose to change over time. I am so happy I am at this point in life after so many dark feelings and being scared of letting your family know who you are. Now my wife, three daughters and sister know.  And the support from all of you helped so much. Thank you.

Now but not have done it yet can say I'm going to a support group meeting without having to hide or I going to the Transgender Day Remembrance which I have not yet went to without hiding.

I know this part is off topic but I am finally letting myself out. Sooooo happy!

Thank you all
Melanie   


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Quote from: Emily R on June 03, 2015, 08:36:19 PM
Luna,

I remember you saying that E is addictive, well i have only been 5 weeks on the lowest dosage and I already feel that I need to go the the lowest trasitioning dosage.  I want to see my body change drastically!

Melanie,

Yes the skin is getting softer, but not only that, I feel more pleasure touching my skin that before. Now I know why women are always touching their legs, it feels sensual.

One week to my therapist appointment and 7 more weeks to the endo appointment.  Let see what she changes dosage wise!

Emily

If low dose serves as a diagnostic tool, then I think you have found your answer. Not that there was much doubt to begin with. The feel of soft skin is euphoric.

Congrats Melanie! Enjoy your journey!

Emily - You and I are basically on the same schedule. I have my next appointment a week or so before you do. I am contemplating asking for an increase in E. I also am curious as to how the Dutasreide will show in my blood tests. Softer skin, slower hair growth and more emotional! I  sure do not handle stress in the same way! Not much breast development as far as I can determine although I so experience some aching in my breasts from time to time. I have noticed that I do have some regrowth of hair on the top of my head (MPB) but not too much. My hair is still a point of concern. Not to the point of a wig as I am still walking a fine line between androgyny and female while out and about. Electrolysis is a slow process. I have 10, I think. One hour of pain! I have a long way to go. Had a pedi two days ago and for the first time had a bit of colour put on (a very pale pink).

Although I get frustrated with how slow things are progressing, I just keep reminding myself that I at least am heading down the right path and that each day that goes by is a day that I can finally be the woman that I am!

Hi Emily;
I am about your age and on low dose HRT (Oestrogen only) and I have been on HRT for just a little over 2 years. Its not a transition dose, but its probably on the cusp of one. The important thing is you will see changes, but it takes time. I now have breasts, although they are only B Cup and for my upper body I really need to see a large D or DD Cup.  I have also added about 2" to my buttocks and definitely have better projection (I even have stretch marks), but unfortunately I am still overweight despite a lot of exercise and dieting. I passed the pencil test on my breasts about 10 months after starting HRT. Now my nipples are permanently erect, my aurolae about 4 times the size that they were and I have a lot of breast tissue towards the armpits with well rounded breasts, albeit that look small on me. I have also added about 1" to my hips. My face has also changed becoming more rounded and less angular especially on the cheeks. My MPB stopped and I have had some re-growth. Hope this all helps
JudithLynn

Ladies,

It is nice to hear from you JudithLynn, Islandgirl, Stochastic and others to know that I am not the only one that started transitioning late in life, some of you have an earlier start but hearing that hopefully there will be changes in a year or two gives me hope an reduces my dysphoria.  The last few days I have felt that because of my my age and responsibilities to my family i was in a dark hole in which i would never get out, as I want to transition NOW! But your comments make me see the light and they provide hope that I will be there with the changes in the body that I desire, NO, that I need to live as me and not as the old male individual that I have been.  Maybe it is that I dont see myself fully transitioning for another 3 to 4 years and that is a very long time.

What can I say, but that I have felt down and somewhat depressed in the last few days.  I know we all go thru them, it just my turn now...     

Judithlynn, maybe being overweight as you said you were is what giving you the breasts and buttocks.   I am 6 feet tall and currently weight 180 lbs and was at around 168 lbs 6 months ago, I am trying to lose the extra pounds i gained, but I wonder if then I will develop my breasts, thighs, buttocks etc as I want?  I dont know if to stay the same or lose the weight.  May I ask you how tall you are and your weight, maybe PM if you rather not say it here?

Once happy thing I found out today, is that my feet have become smaller, not a lot but my US size 11 shoes fit much better, today I had an oportunity to try a few pairs that I have not worn in a while, and while they were not lose, they fit a lot better and I can actually remove the shoe without having to pull them out by hand.  I secretly have hope that this would happened as I dont want to give up wearing size 11, but having read the medical papers on HRT did not really expected for it to happen.  How about you ladies?

Thank you for the moral support, we are all together in this journey and I would definitely like to meet all of you face to face someday, maybe we could have a "Susan's Girls" unofficial get together at all of the transgenders conferences so that we slowly could meet our sisters face to face regardless how many we have the opportunity to attend.

Thank you all for making me feel better.

Emily

1. How long have you been on low dose and reasons for choosing low dose.
   
    I started low dose spiro and E three weeks ago. I felt I needed to go down this road to give my self the chance of finding the person that I truly am. But I need to present male for an unknown amount of time for the risk of hurting family and friends. I am currently only out to my wife, who is totally supportive.:-)

2. Describe to what extent low dose has helped with dysphoria.

    I was managing my dysphoria before starting HRT, but I knew if I did not start down this road I would end up not being able to manage it. So to that extent, it has helped me to remain in a good state of mind. I still hate seeing my manly face in the mirror however.:-(

3. Changes with low dose.

    I have not been able to see any physical changes so far. Mentally however I seem to have a harder time separating my male self from my female self. When in a social situation my mind keeps wandering into my feminine side and it makes me somewhat self conscious.

4. If changed to transition dose, explain reasons for change as well as length on low dose before change in dose.

   It is a tough place to be in wanting physical changes as soon as possible, but also wanting to be able to present male for an undetermined amount of time. I plan on taking this journey one day at a time, and to enjoy life for everything it has to offer. We will see, I may up my dosage when I see my endo in 4 months.

5. Other thoughts.

   I am 59 years young and it is nice to see gals my age going through similar experiences. I don't post much, but this is a great thread and I thought I would share my thoughts and experiences.
   
   Hugs,    Stanna
   

I appreciate the updates from everyone for keeping this going. Probably too many to name, but I thank you all. I would like to spend more time responding to the recent posts, but family, work, home, etc., etc., ........ has the majority of my time.

It reads as if there are many late-in-life transitioners using low dose as a way of taking measured steps toward a transition. I was tempted by higher dosages recently at my last check up, but I need to discuss with the remainder of my extended family and then give them time. It feels as if I am riding the brake of a car that wants to go fast.

Now at 15 months on low dose, changes appeared to have leveled-off as my measurements and weight have stayed the same for several months. Good thing my moods are stabilizing as well because I was embarrassingly cranky at times.

Quote from: Emily R on June 06, 2015, 10:44:16 PM
Once happy thing I found out today, is that my feet have become smaller, not a lot but my US size 11 shoes fit much better, today I had an oportunity to try a few pairs that I have not worn in a while, and while they were not lose, they fit a lot better and I can actually remove the shoe without having to pull them out by hand.  I secretly have hope that this would happened as I dont want to give up wearing size 11, but having read the medical papers on HRT did not really expected for it to happen.  How about you ladies?

Possibly due to weight loss? I have not noticed any changes in shoe size. However, my wedding ring slides off the finger easily when it was once very tight. Extending that concept to a foot, I could see very small reductions that would give a little more room in a shoe.

Quote from: Stochastic on June 13, 2015, 07:25:41 AM
Possibly due to weight loss? I have not noticed any changes in shoe size. However, my wedding ring slides off the finger easily when it was once very tight. Extending that concept to a foot, I could see very small reductions that would give a little more room in a shoe.

I don't understand either as I have gain about 10 Lbs (4 Kg) in the last 6 months, but after wearing the shoes I can definitively say that they fit better..  No it is not the one or two sizes some girls have reported , but I wonder if my toes have become thinner allowing more space in the shoe box and making them more comfortable, anyways I am happy but would be happier if I were to loose a full size or two.

Don't worry, I think that there are others including myself that will keep this thread going, sounds like you have outgrown it, as I will probably do too as some point when i have reach my goals or life become more dynamic, but we are grateful to you.   Just drop by occasionally as we would like to hear how you are doing and your progress.

Hugs,

Emily

Shoe size, I was a 13 men's (big feet ) . I ordered a pair of Tom's in 13 and the shoe slipped off my foot. I then ordered a 12 and it is loose but stays on. My older sneakers are too big. I have been on full dose hrt 2 years and I never expected this. I am 16 pounds heavier than when I started HRT. Oh, my work shirt sleeves go to my lower palm too.

I'm on LD too... It's been a year and I've had enough changes to allow me to transition without increasing my dose.  I probably will increase my dose for a variety of reasons but the pace has been great and helped me bring along my partner and our kids.  I'll be 18 months LD when I finish transition at work.


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I've been on a low dose for 12 days now and it has helped tremendously with my depression. I know longer go to bed every night wishing God would take and waking up dis appointed he never did.

My skin started to soften a little where I notice it and my facial hair does not grow in as fast. Oh it still comes in but not as much at the end of the day. I love this part.

The best part is the anger has gone! I wish I did this a long time ago.

That's my 12 day update. I'll keep you posted.
Melanie