Please list any things good you can think of about being trans.
This topic was inspired by Dennis, our forum admin.

Realizing that I am transsexual, accepting and embracing she who was always within; transitioning.  These are good.

I could not and did not see these things until I accepted who I am at age 51.  Prior to that there wasn't anything besides pain and hate, self-injury and hiding from myself and the rest of the world.

Wing Walker

I posted this in the past.  It is a quote from a woman who started life as a boy but now her body and mind match perfectly.  It pretty much summarizes how I feel too.

QuoteBecause being transsexual is often so hurtful, so filled with sadness and longing, with shame and loss and difficulty, it is easy to come to the conclusion that the whole thing is utterly a curse, perhaps inflicted by arcane and evil ancient gods.

Oh, probably.

But there is an upside too.
Most human lives are utterly mundane, devoid of any real uniqueness, the average person somnambulates through an existence devoted to filling the roles expected of them.

But to be a transsexual is a magical, wondrous thing.

Consider. We are given many gifts in compensation for the terrible loss of our childhood as ourselves, and for the pain we endure. We are by some as yet unknown mechanism statistically far more intelligent, as a class, than perhaps any other kind of people. We are almost universally more creative, and we often possess incredible levels of courage and self determination, demonstrated by our very survival, and ultimate attainment of our goal. We are rare as miracles, and in our own way, as magical, or so has been the belief of all ancient cultures on the earth.

We are given awareness that others would never experience, understanding of gender, of the human condition, of society and the roles and hidden rules unquestioned within it. We are given a window into the lives of both sexes, and cannot help but be, to some degree, beyond either. From this we have a rare opportunity: to choose our own life, outside predetermined and unquestioned definition or role. We can do new things, original things, only because our experience is so unique.

We get to be true shapeshifters, and experience the sheer wonder of melty-wax flesh and a real rebirth into the world. Our brains and bodies gain benefit from having been bathed in and altered by the hormones of both sexes. We appear to retain our visible youthfulness where others wrinkle, and for years longer. We possess neural advantages from both sexes, such as the language advantages of the feminized brain, and the spatial abilities of the masculinized brain both. We are shocked into waking up, if we allow it, to a life we create for ourselves...we are not automatically doomed to sleepwalk through life.

After our transformations, after the full-moon lycanthropic miracle that the modern age affords us, we can live lives of success and love, and genuine specialness, if we choose. If we can get past our upbringing, past the programming, the bigotry, the messages of disgust from the culture around us, if we can stand as ourselves in freedom, then our special gifts grant us a heritage of wondrous power.

We have a proud and marvelous history. In ancient days we were magic incarnate. We were Nadle, Winkte, Two-Souls, Shamans and healers and magical beings to our communities. We possessed the ability to give the blessings of the gods and spirits, and were prized as companions, lovers, and teachers.

We were the prize gift of ancient tribes, entertainers, designers and dreamers. Sometimes we were the -somewhat reluctant- rulers of empires, and the consorts of emperors. We were champions and warriors too, who were feared for our unique gifts turned to inevitable victory.

Know that it is only in recent centuries, with the rise of the single minded, monolithic and monotheistic desert religions, filled with harsh single gods and twisted, narrow morals, that our kind have become reviled, the objects of scorn. Once, we were the kin of the gods.

To be transsexual is not easy, and it is not a birth that could be envied, but neither is it a damnation. It was once considered a rare wonder, if a mixed one; a faery gift that cuts as it blesses.

And in the modern age, of hormones and surgery, we are the first generations of our kind to finally know the joy of complete transformation, of truly gaining our rightful bodies. No other transsexuals in history have been so fortunate.

I say that we are unicorns, rare and wondrous, with still a touch of ancient magic and the kinship of the gods. Though it is agony, beyond the fire we have the opportunity to become alchemic gold.

We have much to add to the world, and to give to ourselves and those who love us.

We have always been, we are still the prize of the tribe, for only the world around us has changed, the desert harshness branding us vile. We are still the same.

Our compensations are real, and our lives are special; we have but to grasp the gifts born of our sufferings.

When I look around me at the mundane lives, there are times I think that maybe I am glad I was born transsexual, for I would never have been what I have become without that curse. I cannot help but be grateful for my uniqueness.

tink

Having lived in both genders has given me considerable insight into the ways people think about and experience gender. Because I don't like when people make assumptions about me because of perceived sex, I tend to treat all people the same regardless of their gender, thus I often get to know people without their usual masks on. I've also made friends with some amazing people in the queer community who I might not have gotten to know otherwise. This hasn't always been the easiest path to live on, but I wouldn't trade it.

y2g

Quote from: Tink on December 02, 2007, 05:23:21 PM
It was once considered a rare wonder, if a mixed one; a faery gift that cuts as it blesses.

And that's how I've always seen it... that's it exactly... and not merely as a cute metaphor.

This was never just a "medical condition" for me; instead, it's been my meaning, my purpose, the religion of my very *life*. And as much as it hurt, I don't think I'd have wanted it any other way. I'd rather be cut, bleeding and in pain... than numb and cold to this world.

~Kate~

Yes it is a gift, I have been aware of this for a good many years but I didn't know that either one of these gifts had a name. I spent a good part of my life walking in the darkness and I was not aware that on either end of the island there was a light house. I was not interested in being either gender and even less interested in either sex. I never considered identifying as either one gender or the other. This was my way of tuning out.

Cindy 

Tink, Y2, Kate, Cindy,

I wish I had said all that you did.  Your words are my life described.

Thank you for sharing.

Wing Walker

My god Nero, you're soliciting positive input *holds hand to Nero's forehead*

The other plus that I haven't mentioned, that is nowhere near as mystical and magical as the others have talked about, is simply that because I am who I am and am transitioning or have transitioned in a very small town where I'm a public figure, is that people just get used to it. I don't try and teach, but who I am sometimes winds up having that effect. And that feels good.

The other thing that feels good is just being seen as me finally. Always, I had this invisible man there. He was only visible to me. He grew up with me - used to be an invisible boy. Now people can see me as who I am, finally. One of the other lawyers in town said to me, shortly after I transitioned, when I wasn't passing at all and I was standing outside, looking like a 15 year old boy in my suit and feeling self-conscious as hell...he said "I never got that whole Dennis-Denise thing. Now I see you and you look so much more comfortable, now I get it." And that was at my worst.

I wouldn't trade my life for anything. Although I would like a dick.

Dennis

I doubt I'd be in such a dodgy poly relationship if I wasn't TS.

It seems to break taboo to the point that you just don't care.

Tink!  That was beautiful!  Where did it come from?  Anyone we know?  It certainly speaks to my heart.  Especially the spirituality parts.

Thanks!

-Sandy

Sometimes our feelings are predicated upon our being insecure.  We imagine most of the negativity that is simply our family's and friends' getting used to hearing we mention anything regarding it.  Don't fret. Everybody comes around eventually. Peeps just need to get used to the idea.

Hi, Kassandra,

Looking at your picture just conjured-up all of what I am about to post here.

Coincidence or synchronicity? I have a ghost friend I have known since I was a child and her name is Cassandra, but then, that is neither here nor there for what I am going to disclose.

I believe that the greatest gift one could have is to know and feel their humanity.  This must be done before one can figure out anything else.

I like getting up in the early hour of the morning and putting on a pot of fresh coffee, then going out on the front porch and just set in my favorite chair or rocker and watch the first rays of light illuminate the horizon, and listening to the thousand of little birds come to life singing.

The sun creeps-up and the light builds into a multicolored tapestry that any artist would envy. The orb of the sun begins to rise into a splendor of red, orange, and yellow that is reflecting this colorful light onto the glassy-calm waters of the lake, enshrouded at its edges by a light mist that is quickly retreating before the encroaching sunlight.

Once one has found this peace within ourselves then it becomes much easier to accept and know, *to actually know,* the gender one is and to be at peace with who they are, and to make peace with yourself whether binary or not.

Cindy

Quote from: Dennis on December 03, 2007, 03:52:55 AM
...

Always, I had this invisible man there. He was only visible to me. He grew up with me - used to be an invisible boy. Now people can see me as who I am, finally.
...



Dennis

wow, so true so true, a least I know I wasn't the only one now.

see I knew the forum would help me understand my self



I thought about this question all day, meeting wonderful and very caring people in a community that is like minded and knowing I'm not such a freak after all.  Now being able to be trans (in this day and age) and having options, to me, is wonderful. It allows me to at least get close to my ideals. I can't image what it would have been like years and year ago.

Wow, this thread is the reason I registered to this site. I've seen it a few times but never really, felt a need to post on the forum. I love being in the middle, neither blinded by the 'good' or 'bad' of either gender. It is kind of like taking the best of both, and not be blinded by the pros for any one aspect, without seeing the cons as well. Don't assume many things because you know the 'other side to the story' many of the times. <3