I live in a small community and many people tell me cause they knew me for so long they have the right to say "he" and use my old name. I've taken up practice to ignore the name entirely as if it doesn't even exist its my defense mechanism. however when I hear the name in my mind my attention focuses to the source but my body action is to block it out. I guess for me it helps that there are a lot of people around me with the same name, So Ive been conditioned to not quickly react to it for a long time.