After enough nagging from my mother I finally got a haircut. I feel like I lost almost 3 months of progress on my hair. afterwards, it still was too long for her liking and she then berated me in public for almost 15 minutes. She said that "it looked unprofessional", she said "could you get a job or see your grandmother with that haircut?, I don't think it is", she said "I look like someone with problems", she said "no one just decides to grow out their hair one day", she said "I think you better some help (as if I weren't already seeing a therapist), she said "how are you ever going to get a job or go to school", she blamed it on my drinking problem and said "I think your brain is damaged from all the alcohol". She excused her tirade by saying "its not what I say, its what society says..." She then decided to add insult to injury and went on about how much she loves me. I am sick of this. I am sad and angry right now. sad over losing hair, but enraged about what happened when that wasn't enough. I hate her. She is so narrow minded that she cannot even tolerate longer hair on me. I hate her. maybe I will drop the "T-bomb" soon, Its not going to go over well, but I don't care, i have some emotional support. I don't care if she cannot take it. I am sick of the closet, either way I am going to suffer, either in the closet or from an intolerant parents, but my mother deserves to suffer too if her tolerance for not conforming to what she wants is so low. I plan on doing this weekend. She deserves to have every cruel thing she has said to me in the past year thrown back in her face. I am not embarrassed about being trans, just afraid of losing support if they cannot tolerate it. If she cannot accept me, I will not talk to her or her family, she will be dead to me. I am going to share my pain with her. For now i am just going cut, (I don't have any booze right now). My life will probably go to hell (as if it isn't already?). I guess this my personal Stonewall.

alcohol is not a solution to any problem

A bottle of Dewar's would be nice right now, but no alcohol tonight. I am sick of the setbacks. not even my hair is safe from setbacks. I feel violated right now. My transition feels like it hasn't gone anywhere. I live in an intolerant place, with intolerant employers that would never hire a transsexual. I live in a house, with parents who are not as tolerant as they would lead you  to believe. I hate my life right now, I look like a man, and face near constant criticism for growing my hair out a little bit or trying to pluck my eyebrows. 

People have long hair for many reasons. I had long hair for certain times in my past life cos it looks cool. When I started HRT I really let it grow and it was considered fashionable and acceptable because of my age and reputation. If I was just starting out in a professional job then shorter hair is the norm. Unless you know come out.

Mothers love their children and its very much part of being a female and the nurturing side. She is concerned and maybe the comments were somewhat agressive, it depends on your relationship with her. With the TG girls that I have met its the mother that finally stands up for them. Give her a chance and explain and then give her time to absorb what you have said.

Good luck and you get more support from kindness than anger and hurt.

How old are you again? Maybe it's time to stand up for yourself. My mother told me that as a woman I need to stand up for myself more and not be a doormat. She was 100% right.

I have long hair and I work 100% as a male within extremely professional setting with lawyers, Psychologists, Doctors and Politicians. They never even bat an eyelid as I stated a while ago, "I might regrow my hair as I earned that right after 6 years of university."

Not a single thing said except by one lady who said your hair is like fine silk then tried to find out how  wash it.

So sorry that she still isn't getting it despite your effort to meet her part of the way. I can only hope that in time she gains the understanding that she is causing you more harm than good. Hugs
Mariah

I talked with my therapist on Friday and brought up the topic of "coming out" to my parents. He sort of told me that now isn't the best time because he has seen that things usually go better when someone is not living with their parents and that coming out while angry usually isn't a good idea in any case. So the coming-out probably will not happen this weekend if I take the advice of my therapist. Other than that little update, I went out in "girl-mode" today.

Yay!  Where'd you go?  How'd it feel?

I went to my endo appointment this morning dressed en femme and had to come to work afterward.  I really didn't want to change, lol.  I considered just walking in with my bra and tank top and saying screw it!