So as the subject states I had the worse dysphoria ever today and here is how it started. As some of you may know I came out to my girlfriend a few days ago, at first I though she was fine with it but I was wrong. She does not want me to present as female at all and this is kind of disappointing because its just who I am I can't deny that. As you can imagine this cause quite a bit of dysphoria because its just who I am, she gave me the ultimatum either try and live with it or leave me. Idk what to do right now I love her with all my heart but Idk if I can suppress my female side anymore.

Hugs.

I went through this about three years ago. Not my girlfriend, my wife of 20 years, but the exchange went much the same way. She ended up leaving me.

You have no control over whether she supports you. If her love for you is stronger than her need to have you remain the way you are, she will be there for you. If not, there is no way you can change that.

It's awful, and painful when you find out that someone who you thought would be there for you might not be. When you transition it's something you need to understand as a possibility and to plan for.

We'll be here for you. You're doing the right thing. No one can keep lying to themselves about who they are forever.

Hugs... feel for you

Its very hard for your partner to understand and accept, and sometimes peer pressure may play a part in that too as well as upbringing...

Maybe talk and give her a little more time... My only added note to that is that only you know how much pressure you have inside to drive you forward, and sometimes that may be alone.

FWIW I have to make my announcement to a wife of 40 years and a family of 3 kids and 4 grandkids imminently, I have no idea which way it will go (although I believe I do), regardless I must push on.

So I your context you probably may need to dig deep if she does not come around.

Hugs ...I really hope it turns about for you

Katy xx

I am sorry to hear that. If she cant accept your true self, she is not worth it. You deserve someone who will love you for who you are. Someone who will comfort you in hard times instead of giving ultimatums. Best of luck to you, i really hope you find happiness!

Good luck, hugs.

Thanks for the reply's everyone, I just have to take this one day at a time. I guess only time will tell how things will work out I think I just need to let her think about it and realize that its just who I am. I am so grateful for you all you all have helped me so much these past couple weeks, I think I just need to find a good therapist to just sort things out.

I'm so sorry that happened to you *hugs*

I hope with time she will come to accept me as I am, because Idk if I can suppress who I am for much longer.

sorry to hear that your gf doesnt except,but its a good thing for you to find out while dating and not married. she says no way and she means no way,and prob will never accept it,she wants you to confom to what she wants and not what you want. you need to talk and i mean talk to each other and not at each other,because if she wants to be with you she will accept it,if not its time to move on and find someone who does. remember not all women want a lesbian relationship,this is why i didnt transition,i find balance with underdressing and full dressing instead,i just play act on the man part for i never fit in,in that world,but its to keep my wife happy so she tries to make me happy in return..a relationship is 50/50 not 60/40,there has to be give and take for it to work,after 27 yrs i learned what works and doesnt work.