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Worried

Started by Still Learning, August 27, 2015, 07:58:29 AM

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0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

katrinaw

Andrew, you are fine... we are happy for you showing a photo of your lovely Daughter, I'd be very proud too.

I am almost there, living the dream... just one more hurdle.

Katy xx
Long term MTF in transition... HRT since ~ 2003...
Journey recommenced Sept 2015  :eusa_clap:... planning FT 2016  :eusa_pray:

Randomly changing 'Katy PIC's'

Live life, embrace life and love life xxx
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Dena

People move into the new role without the aid of HRT and often can pass well. As for your daughter, I think she already looks female and at first glance, I thought I was looking at a young Liza Minnelli. The hardest part of passing often is not physical appearance but becoming comfortable society and developing the mind set that you belong. From the smile on her face, I think she may already be comfortable with her new role.

Rebirth Date 1982 - PMs are welcome - Use [email]dena@susans.org[/email] or Discord if your unable to PM - Skype is available - My Transition
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Jacqueline

WOW!   She is so cute! This should be a snap for her. I hope it goes as easily and smoothly as it can for her and you.

When you ask about HRT time line. Do you mean literally what changes she can expect and when or when will most of the changes be done? Two things were mentioned so far:
1 It is different for everyone
2 Usually starting closer to puberty tends to have quick and better effects.

I am only just starting this very soon myself. So I do not have the ability to speak from personal experience. However, there do tend to be specific things that happen in a typical order within a given time frame. I think I can honestly say that while some are able to rush through in under 2 years to do a full transition many seem to take 3-4 years and by then the HRT has evened out but there may still be additional changes. Please correct me, if I am giving faulty information, anyone.

Oh, and it is very tempting to rush ahead into everything as it all seems to be exciting and so right. If you can encourage her to take her time and feel and think through things. I don't remember seeing whether she is doing therapy at university. If she is not, she really should. I imagine there may be fewer bottoming out moments.

I think I can speak for most of us when I say things can be going very well, then crash. She may be moving along with no problems from others. However, a voice or feeling in the head(or from someone else whether thinking about it or not) may bring about huge depressive moments. I think HRT can cause some mood shifts(am I wrong about that?). Many of us will have crashing points. Doubts like: am I doing the wrong thing; I am just a fake; I hate how I look; I don't pass, everybody knows; I am a freak and will never fit in; why don't they have those shoes in my size(okay, you caught me. maybe not that one)... She may just need her friends, a supportive parent or to visit that therapist. We usually can bounce back  without too much problem but it can seem very dire and dreadful at the moment. The hard part for you might  be that she may more want/need a friend.

Have to get back to work.

We are all here and pulling for you and she.

With warmth,

Joanna
1st Therapy: February 2015
First Endo visit & HRT StartJanuary 29, 2016
Jacqueline from Joanna July 18, 2017
Full Time June 1, 2018





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KristinaM



Still Learning,


Will you be my daddy too!  LOL.  Stop making me cry so much!  [emoji14]


To reiterate what others have said, HRT takes a long time to work its magic.  Before and after photos (or monthly photo updates) are good measurement tools, as well as tape measures to check shifts in body dimensions.  I take my measurements every month now so I can stay encouraged even when I can't see the changes day-to-day.


I think she's very cute and has lots of potential!  Longer hair will help too, but that takes a while to grow out as well.  The in-between stages are definitely difficult to suffer through, but you shouldn't have anything to worry about.  She already looks like a girl to me!  :)
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Jayne01

Hi Andrew.

It is awesome what you are doing for your daughter. You are trying learn about and understand what it is she is going through. You are sticking by her and being the living parent she needs. Nobody can ask any more than that. I have looked at the photo you shared and she looks beautiful. I cannot see anything in the photo that suggests that she is anything other than a happy young lady. I wish you both the very best. She is very lucky to have you looking out for her best interests. I'm glad she had the courage to face all this at a young age with her whole life in front of her.

I too am an Aussie. There doesn't seem to be too many people on here from Australia, but there a few.

Jayne
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captains

You have a lovely daughter, and the fact that you are trying to do right by her means a lot.

My one tip: practice saying your daughter's new name and pronouns, calling her your daughter, saying she's beautiful rather than handsome, etc. It's hard for all people, parents especially, to get used to that kind of switch, but after it comes out of your mouth enough times, it'll start feeling natural and right. And hearing it from you without any hesitation or stumbling will probably mean the world to her. It always has to me.

Good luck to you both. :)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
- cameron
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Tessa James

Hey Andrew you really are a great Dad.  A sense of loss and grieving for who you knew as your son is reasonable and a frequent concern for significant others and families of those who transition.  We all grieve in our own way and recover at our own pace.  I trust your love for her and sense of rediscovery will prevail.

I started my training to be a registered nurse back in 1973.  That was one of the best decisions I ever made and was a career where I worked with many other women in a collegial and supportive atmosphere.  The career field provides for unlimited opportunities and I chose advanced education to become an anesthetist.  I certainly think she is considering a great career option as she may have some special empathy and interest in mental health.

Thank you for sharing with us here.
Open, out and evolving queer trans person forever with HRT support since March 13, 2013
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cindianna_jones

#27
Still, you did not violate the rules. You are good there. It's just that the site does not allow you to upload a picture of yourself (the one on your left) next to your posts for a bit. It's a programming setting not a rule to abide by.

Now concerning your daughter's appearance... Oh my, how so many of us are drooling. She is absolutely stunning. She won't have any problems. HRT? It helps many. Didn't do much for me. I just had to tough it out. So what if I have the shape of a teeny bopper, now reaching for my sixtieth in a couple of months.  I just wear teeny bopper shaped clothes. My avatar pic is current by the way.

Concerning her looks, she will do extremely well. She will just become prettier no matter how HRT affects her. Sometimes, just the change in attitude makes a world of difference. She and you will be happy.

Cindi
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ChiGirl

You are being a wonderful father.  Hugs!

Sent from my SM-G900T using Tapatalk

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LizK

She looks like a happy, happy, young lady and I am sure she will be able to easily blend into the crowd safely. I am sure with the number of posts on this thread you can see that this community cares about its own and their families. Just remember you are never alone and neither is your daughter. Good luck with he journey ahead, I am sure it will be a steep learning curve for you both. Take care

Sarah T
Transition Begun 25 September 2015
HRT since 17 May 2016,
Fulltime from 8 March 2017,
GCS 4 December 2018
Voice Surgery 01 February 2019
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Still Learning

Thanks heaps Sarah (one of my favourite names) It really makes me feel relieved to know that others think she will be able to blend in okay...at the end of the day all I can wish for is her happiness and safety.

I'm sure we will go through the usual father, daughter hiccups but thanks to everyone here I now see them more as average parental concerns rather than catastrophes waiting to happen.

Hope everyone has a great weekend
Andrew x
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