Hay
So I haven't come out to anyone other then my wife and one of her close friends so she can talk to someone about it.
At home i can wear what ever i want and when i go out i wear intimates under my clothes.
But work is a completely different thing, i work in law enforcement and have to get changed in a locker room.
i know that most of the guys are very unaccepting of people they perceive as different so today i had to put on gender acceptable cloths. does anyone else have this problem or ways to help deal with it.

I haven't had the changing part (I am really sorry you have to deal with that). But I do work in a very "masculine-centrist" place, and I often feel like I really have to turn up the masculinity to get by. I'm pretty butch but I hate having to get approval from a such misogynistic place.

I wish I had more advice for you (perhaps others will) but for what it's worth, you aren't alone.

You could try something like this:

http://www.walmart.com/ip/22700591?productRedirect=true

They're technically men's and athletes like to use this type of underwear to prevent chafing.

If you transition eventually you will need to have a discussion with HR and have an accommodation made. If you come out as transgender your days in male bathrooms and locker rooms will end at work. Frightening as this may sound now, when you are ready it will all be in stride. As far as changing in stealth mode now, do what feels comfortable yet gives you your relief.

Wish I had magic words of wisdom for you. After describing my job situation my therapist sat with a quizzical look on her face then told me " you REALLY need a different job ". Have nothing except do what you can in your off hours to be positive about yourself and take the job a day at a time. Unaccepting jobs are tough even if your not out. Best of luck and hang in the best you can....

the funny thing is during law enforcement training we do several classes on lgbt community, and also have a group from the community come and talk to us in small groups these people are diverse and have varying backgrounds. But still its very unaccepting, over the last few days i have encountered what the poeple i work with described as man in a skirt, they could not stand in the same area as him and had to move out of sight of him. Even towards gay people last night there was a couple working with a different partner he said" their gay" my response was so what. then he said "i don't have a problem with them unless they cause an issue, but their causing me issues". i would like to think not everyone i work with thinks like this but i will have to wait and find out       

Quote from: AnamethatstartswithE on September 10, 2015, 11:29:26 AM
You could try something like this:

http://www.walmart.com/ip/22700591?productRedirect=true

They're technically men's and athletes like to use this type of underwear to prevent chafing.

Currently out of stock.

I guess I should have looked closer, plus the store might have them. This post does have 100 views so maybe everyone bought them immediately  . I don't know what Lily's time/financial constraints are but there are ways to explain away some methods of feminizing yourself. I used to do triathlons as an excuse to shave my chest/legs. Cycling or swimming would work with that.

It's funny, actually. Walmart.com doesn't work like other online systems. When you place an order it's routed to the nearest store that has what you want, even if that store is a thousand miles away. If it's out of stock it's REALLY out of stock. In case you haven't guessed, fulfilling those orders is what I currently do for money.