-Can FTM imaging themself as MTF?
-And can MTF imaging themself as FTM?

I can't image myself being a MTF. The closest I comes is being a bit feminine. For me it's natural being a guy, so I can't imaging me something else.  (I'm a FTM btw) But I wondering how your thoughts are. I think this would be a interesting topic. It's the reason I ask you. 

As an MtF no!

I do have great sympathy for my transgender brothers but no empathy. I can't imagine what it must be like - it must be terrible. One reason I have absolute respect for my brothers.

You guys are very brave.

Yes of course I can. In fact my mother always maintained that if I had been born female I would probably have insisted on transitioning the other way, and I suspect she might even be right...

I happen to prefer occupying the female form but I can completely understand that the male form also has its pluses.

I feel like I understand and empathize very well, mostly because of being here and reading everyone's stories.

The distress and emotions seems to me to be exactly the same, but in reverse.  Some of the challenges are different but leave a very similar mark on the psyche.

Being human we are all more alike than different anyway.  We all have an innate identity and want to be loved and to live in peace with ourselves.  This I understand and feel the pain when that is missing regardless of which side that man or woman is standing on.


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Haha, absolutely I can. That's my big trans secret, actually. Sometimes I find myself relating more to MTF threads and discussions than I do to FTM ones.

I'm early in my transition, and I don't think anyone who's seen my posts would be surprised to hear that I have a lot of emotional hang-ups surrounding it. I'm not really out, and I currently present as, well, "as male as I can" give that my face and voice read very female. I don't have a lot of social dysphoria, so it's working out alright.

But boy, I have these fears: that people who see me and talk to me can somehow tell that I'm not right, that they know I'm not "really" girl. When I put on something androgynous or feminine, I get this sick, scared feeling in my stomach. It doesn't matter how nice I look, I just know that I look like a "man in a dress." Stupid, awkward, ridiculous, inherently incongruous. I wish I was a girl, a normal girl, but no matter how hard I try, I know that somehow I never will be. 

I ride these bizarre ups and downs where I'll throw away my binder, vow to do better at this whole womanhood thing, to fix myself and finally embrace style and social role I've never been good at. Then, a few weeks later, I'll break down and start presenting masculinely again.

For some reason, these are all feelings I see echoed more from the MTF side of things. Dunno why, but sometimes it freaks me out. Do FTM guys not feel this way? What if I'm not trans at all? What if I've just overly sympathised with trans women or something, and it's got me all confused? Arrghh.

That said, sometimes I imagine like ... moving in the other direction and I feel viscerally repulsed. Not that I think presenting femininely is repulsive, of course! Obviously, for a woman, looking womanly is generally desirable. I just imagine MYSELF starting from male and moving towards female, and I get this horrified feeling. How could [imaginary me] throw away something so great? It'd be the cruelest joke, haha. I mean, honestly, I see myself as just shy of male, so some parts of MTF transition I'd probably enjoy had I been born cis male, but other parts would induce serious suffering.

I know a few FtM guys in real life. They are great to be with, I can see how happy their transition makes them, how scared they are about acceptance, how much they want their body and their social role to match their heart and mind. I love each and every one of them for their spirit and personality.

But it is utterly impossible for me to feel their urge to be male. I feel that they are throwing something precious away, precious to me. Of course I know at the same time that they must feel the same about me, and I feel guilty because I have given up and abandoned what they desperately want, what they can only partially achieve no matter what they do.

We agree that swapping bodies (or brains) would have been an excellent solution.

Thanks for replies! It's many interesting answers.

When I asked you the question, I asked you if you could imaging yourself opposite.
Example a MTF could imaging herself being a FTM instead: A guy "trapped" in female parts.
I just explain my question just in case, so people doesn't need to misunderstand.

I just played a little mind game with myself to see if I could answer the question more specifically.

The answer is yes.  That is the definition of empathy anyway, "the capacity to place oneself in another's position."

Having read people's stories here and understanding their frame of reference I can easily imagine myself in their position.


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I couldn't imagine myself as the opposite side of the spectrum in a million years, but I do have empathy for them considering what was done to my body as a result of my being intersexed and the surgeries that resulted or a series of years a result.  am MtF and I'm perfectly content with that but could never  think of myself as FtM. I'm also proud of them and how strong they are for what they have to go through to become their authentic selves. Hugs
Mariah

This is the most affirmed I've ever felt (as a trans man) in my life.  The empathy of the women on this site is really remarkable. It's such a kindness.

Is this a manifestation of the synchronicity of the universe?

Just two nights ago I had a dream where I was an FtM trans person!  I can almost buy into this but I am sure that when the docs went in to take out my spleen they would have mentioned something like finding some other spare parts like a uterus or a pair of ovaries in there too 

Well I have a probably not very PC interest in drag queens so yeah probably. If I had been born male i would be likely be gender fluid or CD. But i would like my default gender to be male.

Quote from: captains on October 25, 2015, 08:02:01 AM
But boy, I have these fears: that people who see me and talk to me can somehow tell that I'm not right, that they know I'm not "really" girl. When I put on something androgynous or feminine, I get this sick, scared feeling in my stomach. It doesn't matter how nice I look, I just know that I look like a "man in a dress." Stupid, awkward, ridiculous, inherently incongruous. I wish I was a girl, a normal girl, but no matter how hard I try, I know that somehow I never will be. 

[...]

Do FTM guys not feel this way? What if I'm not trans at all? What if I've just overly sympathised with trans women or something, and it's got me all confused? Arrghh.

I'm pretty much the same so either it's common or we're the only two

I can see myself essentially cross-dressing post transition... but not pre. Socially i really ID as gender neutral but it's easier to explain just ID'ing as male because of the physical transition that i want. If it wasn't for my physical dysphoria i probably wouldn't wear exclusively clothes from the mens' sections in shops, but seeing as that's the only thing i can change myself, it's like putting a bandaid on it, if that makes sense.

It is a good question. I will say that I can and do identify completely with anyone who is in the process of transgendering. Maling to female or vice versa; it is a story with common themes, obstacles, and sadly too much tragedy. How in my right mind could I ever not empathize with someone honoring a call to this arduous journey? We all cry the same tears. Sheila Grace

I have felt some of the things a FTM would have felt and know I missed out on some of the others. I know the glass ceiling, the extra time it takes to look nice, the lack of strength, the differenced between boy and girl talk, the disadvantage of boobs, being treated like a second class citizen and the joys of the monthly visitor. I picked the female role and it's were I belong but I can understand that I am trading off one set of advantages/disadvantages for another. It is easy to see how a FTM could feel the other way about life.

Reading this thread, I have sat here for several minutes trying to imagine what it is like for trans men. I certainly understand the dysphoria. I have ached to have a vagina and uterus and ovaries, and breasts and hips for so long, so I imagine it must be very similar to a transguy just wanting a functional penis.  I wish we could trade, lol!  I have no use for mine.

Going on T must be very empowering.  I grew up with male privilege, even though I was not an imposing, masculine, alpha male, and I have taken it for granted.  I wonder if that male privilege extends to transition?  Women have tremendous expectations of them as far as familial roles - care for family members, center of new families, nurturer, care giver, and subjugating their needs to others.  Men are expected to go out there and "do their thing".

I would love to meet a trans guy, and find out what their world is like.  I have a feeling I would come away very impressed with their courage.

Terri

QuoteI would love to meet a trans guy, and find out what their world is like.

One impression I get every time is: Their world is big and new and full of hope and promise.

Going on T must be even more overwhelming than going on E.
The feelings of anger, passion, drive and purpose that come with testosterone must be much harder to bridle and contain than the admittedly wild emotional whirlwinds that soon become a part of life for many MtF.

Quote from: Maybebaby56 on October 25, 2015, 12:52:20 PM

I would love to meet a trans guy, and find out what their world is like.  I have a feeling I would come away very impressed with their courage.

You never dip into the ftm section? lol

I imagine there's lots of parallels. I don't expect tucking to be much more comfortable than binding, for example.

Quote from: Peep on October 25, 2015, 02:45:25 PM
I don't expect tucking to be much more comfortable than binding, for example.

Hahaha, I had that exact thought earlier but just didn't post it.


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I feel like the opposite side would be if I was cis. I do imagine it from time to time, and life seems a lot easier for them that way.

Opposite from myself are the (wo)men who merely strive to fit (wo)many stereotypes.  I... cannot get it.  I'm not a rules-follower.  In a way, my nonbinary identity is means to finally and totally subvert the rules of masculinity, though the impulse was persistent and downright unwelcome -- of course this can happen to anybody.  So of course I could see a person being raised female having the same drive.