Hi Roxie,
Was thinking about you earlier today and wanted to wish you all the best for your appointments next week.
It's a bit late, but my experience was; I didn't find the whole thing quite as scary as I thought it would be.
I can understand why some people find Dr Toohey a bit of a struggle, but he is kind and tolerant. For me, I was worried that the whole process seemed open-ended, although I was feeling quite vulnerable to start with. I resolved that it was in my interests to be totally honest and transparent with him, even if I found it shameful or humiliating. It seemed as if Dr Toohey had exhausted all the questions he had, and still didn't give me any diagnosis or determination, and so I kept turning up to appointments after I felt we had run out of things to talk about. Eventually I started to feel a little exploited, so I became a bit more assertive, and asked directly whether he had sufficient information and would provide me an endorsement or not. He told me he had no reservations, and the letter of endorsement arrived very promptly.
I've also spoken to Dr Scott on the phone. He was very open and direct and made me feel very comfortable. Even on the phone, he made it clear to me what information he needed and how much time we would need to spend together for him to make a determination. If I need further referrals or letters, he would probably be my first choice, although I would be ok going back to Dr Toohey also.
I found Dr Hayes amazing. He never actually asked for the pysch endorsement letter, and when I volunteered it towards the end of the appointment, he never even read it, just popped it in the file. I found him to be the most compassionate, understanding, humane medical provider I have dealt with so far. He was much more concerned about my experiences in my own words than a psych's interpretation of them. Ironically, Dr Hayes was the most affordable appointment in my medical transition, and I left feeling human, dignified, prepared, and informed when leaving his clinic.
I have my first follow-up with Dr Hayes next week.
All the best for your appointments next week. Thinking of you.
P.S. Have you seen The Danish Girl yet? What did you think?