Don't you feel that sometimes everything goes against what we want?

If some of you have been following my time line, it took me about 10 years of stress to finally realise exactly who I was. 

I took the first step in contacting my Doctor who refers me on an urgent basis to se a therapist. Unfortunately things either don't happen fast in the uk or don't happen at all.

Just got home to find a letter from the NHS saying that referring me to a therapist they think is not in my best interests and basically just get on with my life.

So great, now what? I've come so far and now I've hit a dead end. Can. Anyone suggest what I can do now?

Emily

Could you dispute the NHS's decisions?

Possibly but it will be long and drawn out. Think it may well be that it would be easier to make a start on my own while I try. Just don't know where to begin.

Is there a place where I can look for gender therapists?  I've seen 1 for the us but not here

Have another talk with your GP. The GP may know how to rattle the cage or may be able to suggest private treatment.

I'm just so Annoyed. To feel like I'm finally getting my life in order. Only to have the door slammed shut. It really is disheartening

Quote from: Emily Rose on February 05, 2016, 04:33:56 PM
Possibly but it will be long and drawn out. Think it may well be that it would be easier to make a start on my own while I try. Just don't know where to begin.

Is there a place where I can look for gender therapists?  I've seen 1 for the us but not here

http://www.counselling-directory.org.uk/gender-identity.html

I think (but you'll need to double check) that the NHS HAS to refer you to a gender identity clinic if you request it. The mental health referral stage isn't a requirement but is up to the GPs because they have to be sure that you're stable enough to progress. Did they give you any specific reasons for turning you down? If there's some problem they think you have they should be helping you get through that instead of dropping you. If I was you I'd go back to my GP and say you're not going to give up. Get a copy of the NHS protocols and bring it with you.

Or, I think you can pay for private therapy and they might transfer you back to the NHS GICs or you could go private the whole way. I heard of someone who just did their initial sessions (to get referred for hormones) private and then got transferred back to the NHS so that they didn't have to keep on paying - but I might have misunderstood that so don't quote me.

Just read through the letter again to make sure I understood it properly and they didn't  give as spacific reason, just that they don't think their services would be suitable at this time. Just wondering if there is a long waiting time? 

On a good point,  thanks for the link Autumn, not checked for details yet but there a 3 therapists within a mile of me.

Emily,
I met a gender psychiatrist from the UK (from Newcastle from memory) at a WPATH meeting, She emphasised that clients have to state how important the issue is, desperation, suicidal thoughts, not being able to function.  I was lead to believe the NHS is a priority system for referral. If they think you can cope they will not refer due to lack of resources. If you clearly state that you cannot cope you can get higher in the chain.

Not sure if that helps Hon. I'm in Australia and our system is screwed as well but in different ways.

Cindy

Hi all.

Sorry for not getting back on to the forum this weekend but I was feeling so down after Friday. Thanks for all your advice though, I tried to get back to see my Dr only to find out it will take me 3 week to get in and see her.

After feeling the depression sinking in, I decided I had to do something, so using the link Autumn sent, I've contacted my local GT, she only lives about 5 minutes away and I've made an appointment to see her tomorrow afternoon.

Quote from: Emily Rose on February 08, 2016, 07:01:12 AM
Hi all.

Sorry for not getting back on to the forum this weekend but I was feeling so down after Friday. Thanks for all your advice though, I tried to get back to see my Dr only to find out it will take me 3 week to get in and see her.

After feeling the depression sinking in, I decided I had to do something, so using the link Autumn sent, I've contacted my local GT, she only lives about 5 minutes away and I've made an appointment to see her tomorrow afternoon.

That is great news! Good luck! 

Hey Emily, the comment above about your GP having to refer you direct to a GIC is correct.  In my case I didn't need to explain how bad things were for me, just that I was transgender and wanted to be referred to my local GIC.

Good Luck XXX

Quote from: Danionacloud on February 08, 2016, 08:24:40 AM
Hey Emily, the comment above about your GP having to refer you direct to a GIC is correct.  In my case I didn't need to explain how bad things were for me, just that I was transgender and wanted to be referred to my local GIC.

Good Luck XXX

I can't believe how excited but nervous and anxious I am. Thank you for the information about the GIC. I think I will see what I'm like with the therapist first. It's definitely not the easiest think to talk about in person

Considering the huge waiting lists Emily, I would advise starting the GIC process as soon as you possibly can. It'll be many months before you get an appointment at one anyway, so plenty of time to see a therapist elsewhere first.
You can always then just cancel at the GIC if you feel you don't want to go any further.
Also bear in mind that a therapist is exactly what you will see for your first few GIC appointments.

Quote from: Danionacloud on February 08, 2016, 11:01:22 AM
Considering the huge waiting lists Emily, I would advise starting the GIC process as soon as you possibly can. It'll be many months before you get an appointment at one anyway, so plenty of time to see a therapist elsewhere first.
You can always then just cancel at the GIC if you feel you don't want to go any further.
Also bear in mind that a therapist is exactly what you will see for your first few GIC appointments.

I just don't think I'm a strong enough person to be asking for this just yet

Alright to the original poster; See another therapist love. Honestly, it seems like they are pretty bias. Although I do feel what you SHOULD do before you see another one, is to do what I did. Now I am HORRIBLE at articulating words properly (surprising I am an aspiring writer haha), but things for me are better set down with pen and paper... or fingers and wordpad what have you.

I wrote down all the reasons I feel I should be approved and refered to an endocrinologist. Wrote down every feeling, or thought (and this was a MULTIPLE DAY PROCESS), I played it over in my head almost as if it were like a creedo to me or something... a morning ritual for me to repeat all of the reasons and feelings in my head. I have been feeling this way since I was 8 or 9... Somewhere in that area.

Now, after that, after a few days of telling yourself all the feelings and reasons, just ask yourself one thing... "Am I ready"
It not only helped mentally prepare me, but emotionally as well. I was ready. And trust me, my therapist... she picked my brain CLEAN, inside and out. But with great reason. They want to understand you. And understand your reasoning for this.

With that said; Yeah the emotions... nervousness, excitement and anxiety. FULLY normal. And trust me, when you are ready for the hormones... it does not get any better. I got my first shot of Estrogen and picked up my testosterone blockers today. All the week leading up I was shaking, nervous, anxious, yet super excited. I couldnt put down how I feel.

It's almost motivational