Greetings from Denver Colorado!

I'm Adrian. Pre-everything FtM. Actually, I'm still in the closet with the exception of a couple of close friends because I'm slightly (Read: very) terrified of coming out to my parents. Mostly because I'm still in high school and am financially dependent on them, so there's a lot to lose if they don't accept me.

I only really considered transgender as a thing that applied to me after a really long serious of clues that should have been obvious in hindsight.

It all started in eight grade drama class when I insisted on always getting the guy part. I was actually disappointed when I was cast as a female role. I also got to play Romeo in the school play, which was pretty cool.

At one point, it was brought to my attention that most people don't have strong oppositions to gendered labels. I had a French teacher who said "guys and gals" and I wanted to punch her in the face for it. (Why did I have to be a gal? Why couldn't I just be a guy? That was gender neutral right?). I was never an actress. I was an actor. Why change it?

Around the same time, I joined some group chat thing on skype. Someone posted referring to me as he, and I felt something. I didn't bother to "correct" them for it.

A few months later I discovered Chase Ross on youtube. He was really my first intro to trans people existing. Still, I never really applied it to myself. (I hadn't been insisting I was a guy since some absurdly young age so clearly I was just a tomboy/cis girl with internalized misogyny/person who complained too much.

I toyed with the idea of being non-binary for a few months after joining Tumblr, but it never really fit. There were all these people going around saying that they were fine with they or she pronouns and I was utterly baffled as to how they put up with she pronouns. I also discovered dysphoria as a thing that had a word attached to it, which basically confirmed the whole not cis thing. (Admittedly, my dysphoria has always been more social than physical, but it was the physical that led me to websites like this. Also, it's really hard to Google feelings.)

Finally, after a period of time during which I vacillated between non-binary or male, I came to the realization that being a trans guy didn't mean that I had to stereotypically masculine in every single way.

So yeah, that's the condensed version of Adrian's Adventures in Gender-land. At this point, I've been fairly certain about my identity for over a year now, and I'm looking for a community of supportive people for the coming steps. I've wound up on threads on this forum so many times now that I figured it was as good a place as any to create an account.

Looking forward to getting to know you!

Hi Adrian!
I am a guy who happens to be female and I also hate gendered labels.

Sent from my SM-G870W using Tapatalk

Welcome to Susan's Place. I was transsexual and what made me that was the needed gender reassignment surgery to really feel right. If I didn't have that need, I would have fallen into the non binary category so there really isn't very much difference between the two. On top of that, it would be possible for you to have surgery but still be non binary from the other direction. Decide what label (if you need a label) feels right and what you need to change in your life to feel right. Once you know that, you will find others who feel much like you on the site. Even if you still haven't found that, feel free to explore anywhere on the site you want. We are brothers and sisters here and you are joining as an equal. You may also wish to join the youth section as there should be people your age that you can share common problems with. The other thing you should be aware of is the guys tend to hang out in the FTM section so question of that nature will be responded to faster if asked in that section.

Family is always a problem. Some are more accepting than you might think and other are not. Under ideal conditions, you would receive medical treatment which would include puberty blockers. The would stop the feminine development and allow you to obtain more hight. If you are in high school it may be a little late for that but many have transition successfully much older than you.

Much like you my discomfort was more social than body. Others on the site are more body and some are troubled by both. That may allow you more time to get your life together by getting an education and a job that will pay the medical costs.

I am very post surgical but over the years I have learned a great deal about the transition and life after surgery so feel free to ask me any questions you have and I will do my best to answer them.

We issue to all new members the following links so you will best be able to use the web site.

Site Terms of Service & Rules to Live By	Standard Terms & Definitions	Post Ranks (including when you can upload an avatar)
Reputation rules	News posting & quoting guidelines	Photo, avatars, & signature images policy

Thank you @Dena, that is all very useful information.

There are various other reasons I've since decided that male is a far better fit than non-binary, but that is a very different perspective than what I usually see on the issue, so thank you for that.

Unfortunately, considering I'm nearly 17 and hit puberty by 11, it may be a bit late for puberty blockers to do anything for me.

Out of curiosity, is there any specific sorting for jurisdiction when not dictated by language? I'm looking for specifics about policies in Canada and can't seem to find a specific topic for that.

Not much on Canada even though there are surgeons that everybody uses. The fastest way to find what is there is to click on forums at the top of the page and then use the site search on the right top of the screen to search for Canada. You might find more if you are interested in specific areas because I know there are many members from there but they may not use the country name.

If you live in BC, I can try to help.

Hi Adrian 

Welcome to Susan's    Glad to have you here, join on in the fun

Hugs

V M

Hey Adrian,

You've definitely found your supportive community. Great people here.

Have fun on your journey of self-discovery!

-- Sue