what distinction do you have between your personal definitions of femininity and feminism? what does it mean to be a woman? what traditional and new values should/do women subscribe to? how is it different from masculinity?

i, for example, consider myself to be a liberal, strong, independent woman but have been also called a girlie girl by friends. i love girl things, pink, dresses, looking feminine. i think women have to play the tough role and the sweet role when they need to, at different times in order to survive. i believe liking who i am and being a woman who is sexy, nurturing, caring and smart is what femininity is all about.

would you care to share your thoughts?

femininity has a broad meaning to me. It just means "female." It represents women of all types. Ironically, Masculinity has a much more narrow meaning to me. I associate masculinity with some muscle toned meat heat. 

Regarding feminism, I think that feminists should concentrate on being first class women, as opposed to second class men.

Quote from: Blanche on January 06, 2008, 12:15:19 AM

Regarding feminism, I think that feminists should concentrate on being first class women, as opposed to second class men.

Explain.  I don't understand what you mean.

Re: what does femininity mean to you?

Femininity is really appearing and looking feminine. But it may not be just a sole product of gender. There are many genetic females who don't have that femininity and are quite manly, but some males do appear feminine. One or two come to mind that are in rock bands. Some men have femininity and appear very feminine but they don't nessesarily want a gender change. On the other hand some women ooze femininity for example Dolly Parton and Stevie Nicks.

I think from a TS perspective it's very important, femininity is built in to your own persona and comes quite naturally. I had femininity long before transition and people could clearly see it no matter how I tried to present myself.

Hmmm...this is actually a great question Natasha and, unfortunately, I don't believe a lot of women have thought about it in great detail or at great length.

Distinctions? Personally, I don't think there should be distinct concepts. I think they should coincide simultaneously with one another. I think that trouble occurs when they do not.

Traditional values? Nurturing ... something that I think women have run from (or are trying to in order to compete with men and be like men in every aspect) I just think that being norturing is a natural and wonderful part of being a woman and it should never be discarded, tossed or forgotten.

New Values? A twist on what women have been doing forever .... A "get-it-done, don't get in my way, you b****! attitude" (God knows that I have become like that in the last year  ) Our moms did it in their own way, now I believe we still do it but in a more direct manner.

Different from masculinity? Two ends of the spectrum IMHO.  I just think that as long as we, women, embrace our natural gifts, instead of run from them (which has been done quite a bit). As long as women can accept that masculine and feminine are two ends (opposite) of the spectrum and rejoice in our differences with men, we will always be successful at whatever we do and everything will remain perfectly fine.

I hope this has answered your questions.  I personally love being a woman and feel blessed that I was born with the qualities of a woman. As difficult as it may be for men to understand women, it is just as difficult for women to understand men, me thinks.

tink

Quote from: Tink on January 06, 2008, 02:54:08 PM
Hmmm...this is actually a great question Natasha and, unfortunately, I don't believe a lot of women have thought about it in great detail or at great length.

Distinctions? Personally, I don't think there should be distinct concepts. I think they should coincide simultaneously with one another. I think that trouble occurs when they do not.

Traditional values? Nurturing ... something that I think women have run from (or are trying to in order to compete with men and be like men in every aspect) I just think that being norturing is a natural and wonderful part of being a woman and it should never be discarded, tossed or forgotten.

New Values? A twist on what women have been doing forever .... A "get-it-done, don't get in my way, you b****! attitude" (God knows that I have become like that in the last year  ) Our moms did it in their own way, now I believe we still do it but in a more direct manner.

Different from masculinity? Two ends of the spectrum IMHO.  I just think that as long as we, women, embrace our natural gifts, instead of run from them (which has been done quite a bit). As long as women can accept that masculine and feminine are two ends (opposite) of the spectrum and rejoice in our differences with men, we will always be successful at whatever we do and everything will remain perfectly fine.

I hope this has answered your questions.  I personally love being a woman and feel blessed that I was born with the qualities of a woman. As difficult as it may be for men to understand women, it is just as difficult for women to understand men, me thinks.

tink

Femininity is not gender based. You can get very masculine women and very feminine men. It's not related to nurturing or upbringing or stereotyping. Femininity is in both sexes the same as masculininity is also...

Quote from: Tink on January 06, 2008, 02:54:08 PM
Hmmm...this is actually a great question Natasha and, unfortunately, I don't believe a lot of women have thought about it in great detail or at great length.

Distinctions? Personally, I don't think there should be distinct concepts. I think they should coincide simultaneously with one another. I think that trouble occurs when they do not.

Traditional values? Nurturing ... something that I think women have run from (or are trying to in order to compete with men and be like men in every aspect) I just think that being norturing is a natural and wonderful part of being a woman and it should never be discarded, tossed or forgotten.

New Values? A twist on what women have been doing forever .... A "get-it-done, don't get in my way, you b****! attitude" (God knows that I have become like that in the last year  ) Our moms did it in their own way, now I believe we still do it but in a more direct manner.

Different from masculinity? Two ends of the spectrum IMHO.  I just think that as long as we, women, embrace our natural gifts, instead of run from them (which has been done quite a bit). As long as women can accept that masculine and feminine are two ends (opposite) of the spectrum and rejoice in our differences with men, we will always be successful at whatever we do and everything will remain perfectly fine.

I hope this has answered your questions.  I personally love being a woman and feel blessed that I was born with the qualities of a woman. As difficult as it may be for men to understand women, it is just as difficult for women to understand men, me thinks.

tink

i like your answer

I liked my answer..

Quote from: Berliegh on January 06, 2008, 09:04:48 PM
I liked my answer..

i'm delighted that you do because i don't

What does femininity mean to you?

A woman who is honest and herself|

Sexy but not showy|

Smart and assertive (for what is right rather than for merely her personal desires), but humble and not domineering|

A physical beauty that proceeds from the inside-out (three dimensional beauty), rather than that which is imposed by the media or the fashion "experts" (two dimensional beauty)|

Can kick a man's butt when she needs it, but *never* just to show she is superior to him.

Ye, even though I didn't know what it was when I was a kid, I can identify it as femininity and has always been there to this day. As for nurturing and intuition I guess I had to have those qualities or I may not have had 11 children go under my roof through the years.

Cindy

I like Berliegh's answer. 

I agree that femininity is not gender based.
Femininity is something that means soft, and loving, caring and compassionate.  Being strong when necessary, but then having the capacity to take a less dominant role to appease others.  To accommodate, to be a team player and not a leader.  To not be brash and outspoken, but to be gentle and informative.

Both men and women can have these qualities, but women generally nurture them and men abhor them for fear they will appear weak.

Jenny

Well I believe for me my femininity is the main of hair I have, I am thankful for that hair. I have a lady friend on  Long Island, Carol, once told me that out hair is our crowning glory. Fools people in trying to guess my age. I thought what my friend said that was neat.

Cindy

i belive feminity to be whatever each woman defines it to be, we are all different, and if we were all the same, the world would be boring and not worth living in.


Mickie

All individuals have their very own unique personality and character. Ever find yourself sitting on the side line watching the show unfold bellow you each with their own sets of beliefs?  Now there is what I would call a comedy hour during happy hour.

Cindy