I'm surprised at how many people say their libido is pretty much completely gone. Does that bother any of you that it's happened to?

Mine disappeared for a while, which was kind of a nice relief, but I was also glad when it came back. It's one of the more enjoyable aspects of life in my opinion. Just wish it would've stayed at a sort of low level, because at this point it's pretty much just as distracting, maybe even more so, than it was on T. 

Depends on whether you mean the "Gotta have it at all costs" sex drive or a desire for intimacy.

The sexual aspect is now just an extension of my affection for my wife rather than the self serving obsession it was before.

Before my transition, I always saw myself as a straight guy, I always was into women.. never really questioned it.

When I started my transition, I was a lesbian, I even dated a few ... then somewhere down the line, I met a guy who I was attracted too.. and we started dating.. so I was bi... after that ending, I dated another woman.. but I found myself wanting a guy.. I wanted to be penetrated by a man.

Now, I see myself as a straight woman, and I am engaged to a wonderful man. Did my sexuality change, or was it I was finally in the right body .. who knows.. but I am happy.

I used to consider myself bi before trans but I don't think I could be with a woman right now simply cause I would keep comparing myself to her, maybe that will fade when I grow more comfortable with my own body.

But now I am very happy with my boyfriend

Quote from: JoanneB on May 02, 2016, 07:04:08 AM
One of the things I learned about the real me is that she was always envious of women. Certainly never sexually attracted or aroused like guys are to women.

Hi Joanne, I feel the same way in terms of not ever thinking of penetrating women or getting sexually aroused in that sense. However, I have had deep romantic desires and desires to kiss them all over. Of course I envy women in general too and wish I was like them. Was this also the case with you? Did you ever have a desire to kiss women in a romantic way?

Quote from: rachel_grr on May 06, 2016, 01:40:13 AM
Hi Joanne, I feel the same way in terms of not ever thinking of penetrating women or getting sexually aroused in that sense. However, I have had deep romantic desires and desires to kiss them all over. Of course I envy women in general too and wish I was like them. Was this also the case with you? Did you ever have a desire to kiss women in a romantic way?

Desires and plenty of RLE with that. I am(or is it was?) a hopeless romantic in that respect. I needed to be friends, intimate in spirit long before the flesh. And only after a proper "courtship" was there a desire for sex.

Those nights with my somewhat disturbing dreams being involved romantically with men combined with a lot of "He is hot" sort of has convinced me my wife is right about E and who is the likely candidate to first exercise the "I'm going to have sex with..." pre-nup option (with rules) my wife asked for.

"May you live in interesting times" 

QuoteUntil now, I have categorized myself as a straight male. I have always liked and been with women only sometimes while crossdressing- but Ive always felt stuck in a male body.

I had always considered myself hetro male, despite wanting to wear feminine things.  But several years ago, a friend who was helping me cross dress suggested I try having sex with a man.  This discussion came about because she asked me if I had considered a sex change.  I said I had many times, but if I had one, I'd be a lesbian, as I didn't have an interest in men.  When she made her suggestion, I gave it a try.  I had sex (oral only) with a few men and found I enjoyed it, but still preferred women.  However, in general, sex has never been the centre of my life.  I enjoy it when I get it, but I don't get a lot.

QuoteI'm surprised at how many people say their libido is pretty much completely gone. Does that bother any of you that it's happened to?

Given that I currently don't have much of a sex life, I don't think that would be much of a problem.

   I have never been consumed with a need for sex. When I was young I liked girls, wanted to be with girls, dated girls. They we never really sex objects to me. I was raised to respect women and I may have taken it a bit further than necessary. I would venture to say I lost more girlfriends through inaction than anything else. I simply was not aggressive when it came to the pursuit of sex.
   When I was married I enjoyed sex during the 21 years. I enjoyed taking the passive roll best and many are the times I would imagine I was the one on the receiving end. After my divorce more than 23 years ago I have rarely thought of being in a relationship so sex in that time has been non-existent. Instead I gravitated toward online porn of the variety consisting of men with ->-bleeped-<-s or sissies, visualizing myself in the feminine roll again. Since starting HRT even that has ceased. Sex is just not a going concern.
    In talking with my health providers I have told them all the same thing. I relate to the female roll. When I fantasize about sex, it is with a faceless man, and myself as a female. The man means nothing more than a means to an end. I had never been attracted to men, though I have thought about what a real penis would feel like from a female point of view.
    I am old enough to accept that I may never have sex again and I am good with that.

  Hugs,
    Jeanette
   

For me this is going to be one of the toughest subjects I have to  deal with. I know what Liz wants, but I need to accept that this is also what I want...if I look back on my behaviour I can see the answer to the question.

I am almost sure, that what I want, is to be loved by a man and to be made love too, by a man. I have only ever seen myself having sex as a woman with a man. I quit sex 10+ years ago, could never really understand what the fuss was about. It was more of a mutual unspoken decision than a full blown discussion and when we stopped we both then breathed a sigh of relief...maybe she sensed something I don't know and it doesn't matter anymore. I just have to be really honest with myself and what I want. 

Liz