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Still no luck :(

Started by EmilyRyan, May 06, 2016, 11:54:16 PM

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EmilyRyan

Well it's May now. Still don't know what to about moving away from my parents so I can transition. My bid to move to Washington State is a bust, after doing much research and talking to people I'm very likely to end up living in the streets there even if I got a job. 

Plus getting a job where I currently live (in Tennessee) is a bust as well. I'm at my wits end here I don't know what the heck to do now nothing will hire me anywhere I can't get hormones I wish I had the will to just kill myself  :'(
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Katiepie

Things may be bleak, but it will come to you. The best thing to do is just y and keep your head up. Remember that you only have one shot at life, and just ending it right in the middle, will not just affect yourself, but it will impact a lot of people.
Please just consider this, you do have a future to look forward to, if for nobody but yourself. Keep your head up, and keep kicking, else you would just be one of just a statistic, and I'm sure you wouldn't want that.

Kate <3
My life motto: Wake Up and BE Awesome!

"Every minute of your life that you allow someone to dictate your emotions, is a minute of your life you are allowing them to control you." - a dear friend of mine.

Stay true to yourself no matter the consequence, for this is your life, your decision, your trust in which will shape your future. Believe in yourself, if you don't then no one will.
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EmilyRyan

Sadly sometimes I think I'm better off being a statistic than being unemployed with no marketable skills and not being able to afford transitioning
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Katiepie

Try and take it one step at a time. Instead of trying to get everything done all at once, try and gain a focus on e one aspect, until you can complete that task. Then once you get one accomplishment, you can regain some motivation as well as getting to your goal, even if you take very very small baby steps to get to it.
I'm sure you can get it on track.

Kate <3
My life motto: Wake Up and BE Awesome!

"Every minute of your life that you allow someone to dictate your emotions, is a minute of your life you are allowing them to control you." - a dear friend of mine.

Stay true to yourself no matter the consequence, for this is your life, your decision, your trust in which will shape your future. Believe in yourself, if you don't then no one will.
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EmilyRyan

Nothing I do is good enough there's too much competition just to even get a minimum wage job and those are having rigorous requirements that I don't meet.

I just want to freaking transition is that too much to ask. I need money and I need it bad but nothing will hire me. I need help  :'(
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Elis

It's very much a long shot; but you could set up a Go Fund Me page. Sorry about your situation; please don't give up.
They/them pronouns preferred.



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CrazyCatMan

 If your looking to move to a different state but are worried about were to live I suggest looking for work here http://www.coolworks.com/. Many jobs on cool works offer rooms or have employee housing. I did this myself for a sort period of time. I know thing are hard but don't be so hard on yourself, things will work out it just takes time. ;D
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Gendermutt

Hi, here's just a thought. Have your socially transitioned (living as a woman)? Getting employment in say a hair salon, nail salon, Selling make up, learning to do make overs? Jobs like this, your gender isn't going to be an issue or much of one that is going to make it as difficult to hire. Anyone seeing a "guy" doing that is not going to have much in the way of expectations, they are just going to expect that you are at the least more feminine, more like a woman anyway.
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EmilyRyan

Quote from: Gendermutt on May 11, 2016, 04:52:11 PM
Hi, here's just a thought. Have your socially transitioned (living as a woman)? Getting employment in say a hair salon, nail salon, Selling make up, learning to do make overs? Jobs like this, your gender isn't going to be an issue or much of one that is going to make it as difficult to hire. Anyone seeing a "guy" doing that is not going to have much in the way of expectations, they are just going to expect that you are at the least more feminine, more like a woman anyway.
I'm transitioning socially as much as I can since I still live with parents. Unfortunately cosmetology isn't something I could do I'm not too good with things that are hands on but thanks.
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sparrow

My wife lived "on the streets" (actually, in a park) for the first few months that she lived in Seattle -- she decided she was fed up with her parents, and moved across the country with a few hundred bucks and the clothes on her back.  Now is pretty much the best time to move with that plan -- if this year is anything like the last three, you'll have 5-7 months of nice weather before the rain comes back.  That's plenty of time to get back on your feet, find a job, and find some roommates.

Another reasonable entry-level job: I've been to several coffee shops in Seattle which have employed transgender baristas -- and I don't mean that I clocked stealth transgender people with my highly-evolved transdar.  I mean, totally obvious nonbinary folk.
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EmilyRyan

Would it be possible to make it as a barista even if I'm not good at working in quick paced environments (that's how I got let go from my last two jobs)?
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Cindy

Depends how determined you are.

You control your destiny.

I know you are trying hard and have grown enormously since being on the site. You have faced life and are starting to get a handle on it.

You are a remarkable person but as yet do not realise it. You have started to see that "I cannot do anything" is not true. OK, your life is tough, but you do control it.

Every time you say: "I cannot do something" reinforces your subconscious. Your subconscious is happy to be safe and not face the hard things; it is the same for people addicted to any substance; 'I can give up cigarettes': The subconscious says "No you can't; just relax and have another smoke"

You go forward by saying; I can do this.

Emily, you can.

I have a great deal of faith in you.
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sparrow

It's common for young adults to get and quickly lose their first handful of jobs.  These are small setbacks, and you'll persevere.  Either you find something you love, or you find the will to get the job done.  You'll find different jobs, and with practice, get into the rhythm of work.  Being grown up is hard work!
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EmilyRyan

I thought the last job I had would be simple, just moving boxes from a line onto pallets and later taking those pallets out to the main floor to be stocked on shelves, until I was let go for being too slow. Unfortunately having a good work ethic and attitude is not enough for the job market even in the lowest of entry jobs. The job I had before Walmart worked at a Goodwill being a donations attendant also got fired for also being too slow.

It also doesn't help that I'm learning disabled and sometimes need extra help or some tasks that should be simple easily overwhelm me. All the jobs I look at want you to be very good at things I'm not even close to being good at or don't even have the aptitude for (like math and science).

I need to face the fact I'm never gonna transition and therefore never gonna live the rest of my life as the girl I'm really am. Can't find afford healthcare can't get a decent job so I can sustain myself. What the heck should I do if there's no there options?? I guess there's suicide
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SueNZ

Quote from: EmilyRyan on May 12, 2016, 11:02:23 PM
I thought the last job I had would be simple, just moving boxes from a line onto pallets and later taking those pallets out to the main floor to be stocked on shelves, until I was let go for being too slow. Unfortunately having a good work ethic and attitude is not enough for the job market even in the lowest of entry jobs. The job I had before Walmart worked at a Goodwill being a donations attendant also got fired for also being too slow.

It also doesn't help that I'm learning disabled and sometimes need extra help or some tasks that should be simple easily overwhelm me. All the jobs I look at want you to be very good at things I'm not even close to being good at or don't even have the aptitude for (like math and science).

I need to face the fact I'm never gonna transition and therefore never gonna live the rest of my life as the girl I'm really am. Can't find afford healthcare can't get a decent job so I can sustain myself. What the heck should I do if there's no there options?? I guess there's suicide
Oh Emily,
Life can be tough and very hard. The one thing I do know is if a person takes their life then there is no chance of good things happening.
I went through a very dark patch 2 years ago that almost saw the end of my business and everything I had slogged my guts out for my 35 years of working. I had 4 lawyers working for me on 4 battle fronts. I hit the lowest of lows and could not see any way forward. What I did was to talk to as many people I could to let them know what was happening. What came out after a while was being put onto the right people that got me through. The ordeal cost me $400,000 but I am still in business and have a chance to keep going. I never once contemplated ending my life because even if I was destitute and had lost everything there is always hope.
Hold onto your dreams, stay tough through these low moments and keep searching for those opportunities.
There is a path for everyone on this planet you just have to keep opening and closing gates until you find yours.
I do envy the fact you are 24 and have a chance to transition one day, for a lot of us there was never any chance so there is your first massive positive opportunity. Now time to see over the coming years how to enact that opportunity.

Please keep looking for the positives and you will find your way.

Take care

Sue
Treat life's difficult times as if they are normal moments, this makes the normal and special ones even more fantastic.
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EmilyRyan

Wish it were that easy but for it's impossible society just doesn't want me
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SueNZ

Positive thoughts only Emily and believe. ;-))


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Treat life's difficult times as if they are normal moments, this makes the normal and special ones even more fantastic.
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EmilyRyan

What can I really do to sustain myself if I can't get a job even at a fast food place (trust me they turned me down too)?

I'm really at my wits end here and would like possible answers to that question. What are some other options or am I doomed to live and die homeless??
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SueNZ

It's really hard for me to guide you properly as down in New Zealand the social welfare system would help. I am unsure of what you could get where you are that could help you in the short term. I have been asked by some potential employees to let them work at no cost to give them a chance. What are your interests, strengths, hobbies and desired jobs. This may help with some advice


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Treat life's difficult times as if they are normal moments, this makes the normal and special ones even more fantastic.
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EmilyRyan

Here in the U.S. there's nothing to help anyone in my situation they like to just simply look down and declare anyone in my situation unemployable and tell me to live in the streets or join the military. Seriously that's how it is around here you have to be lucky to have the smarts to be highly skilled in the fields that are actually hiring and if you're not you're screwed.

As for hobbies and what not I like to history and to read maps but there's no jobs in those and I already tried going into teaching but failed all the three main basic courses for the teaching major it was just too hard. I also like photography but unless I can get big and make a killing selling photos I might as well look for something else.

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