Larisa, we all have our unique stories.
I am in my 60's. I came out to my wife several years ago telling her I simply wanted the option to wear women's clothes at times, and I asked if some of those times could be in her presence. At first she was appalled, then she tried to accommodate me and told me it would be workable for me to wear my bra when I wish under my clothes in public or in bed, but she did not want to go out with me as two women. Then she had a bounce-back, shall we say. I believe she was talking to some of her professional friends about me. She decided to say no to my female side. However, at the risk of sounding too graphic, she to this day fondles what she calls my man-boobs in those intimate moments in bed. This part of my female side she seems to love to have and to hold during intimacy.
So, I took that to indicate that she would be OK with at least a partial transition on my own time.
So now, we are in a full love relationship, and we have been for over 40 years. We are still married, and I have come to the position that, please forgive me, but I will postpone the 100% transition until she passes away. Almost none of her ancestors have lived past 70. That seems to be her genetic programming. Almost all of my ancestors have lived until their late 90's and into their 100's. At almost 64, I still look fabulous in a dress. My face is wrinkled, but I look my age, either as a man or as a woman. Better. I figure I have time.
I love my wife dearly, and Donna will be Donna when she and I are not together.
She is the one who suggested to me that life is too short, that I should go buy that motorcycle I had been dreaming of for decades. I am sure in my heart that she is fully aware that the motorcycle trips she suggests for me is her way of saying, "Be yourself, be Donna on a motorcycle trip."
I wish I could remain fully out with her, but we have retreated to a don't ask don't tell situation until she passes away. I guess for her love I can wait.
However I am fully out to our neighbors at our beach property on the Washington Coast. I visit this feminine retreat for myself often.
Long story, I know, but it is meant to tell you that transition is different for each person. I know I will get there when my wife's health declines due to old age. Due to my lucky genetics, I can fully transition as an older person and still get to 100% long before I die. Then again, my wife may once again accept Donna, Who Knows?
