Quote from: link5019 on September 29, 2016, 10:27:02 AM
That's good!! And maybe I just need to stop saying I'm trans right out the door then lol. But I don't want to be deceptive either
Only your lovers and your health care providers need to know you are trans (and not even lovers necessarily, depends on your relationship). You have a medical condition and you are not being deceptive by not disclosing, you are protecting your privacy. Do people with diabetes have to disclose that to everyone they meet? Of course not. They may have to tell supervisors because of needing a break to eat or something like that, but they don't have to wear a badge for the whole world.
I'm out, and that's my choice, but if you pass and being trans isn't the center of your identity, you are not being a bad person by keeping that fact to yourself with casual acquaintances and strangers. Would they tell you they were missing a testicle or had PCOS when you first met? Probably not, right?
PS: some cis people pride themselves on being able to clock trans people, as if it makes them more discerning or something and so by outing yourself you're giving them the chance to ego-trip about how clever they are. Needless to say, this is not how friends ought to treat each other. They've shown their ass around you, what you do next is up to you.