Know what you want to talk about when you do your consults. Get your X-rays in advance, so you know what possibilities are available to you, and what would work best given the kinds of variances we see in the sexual dimorphism of the bony structures.
I saw both Toby and O back in the day. The entire forehead had to go, completely replaced, and I wanted it set back as far as possible to open up my eyes. New nose, but being a bit long, it made more sense to go for a classic straight edge rather than the button upturn. I was limited in what jaw work I could get done -- the innervation of the mandible (where the facial nerves dive into the jaw) was a bit low, so there was only so much that could be ground down. This, in turn, determined the overall shape of what we could do, but at least I could get a more delicately pointed chin.
I found Toby's aesthetics to be much more in tune with my own concerns, whereas O seemed to do everything exactly the same way (there was less customization) and so I made my picks and took my chances, and got a very good result.
And yes, I knew several women who had gone to both. It's one thing to see pictures, and quite another to see it all working in action.