My photo avatar here is now the same as my facebook one so now everyone can see. 

If people don't like it that don't bother me I do what I want dammit.

where is  the "Do I pass" thread

i think it got lost cuz everyone post here now .

Quote from: JMJW on March 27, 2017, 12:09:51 PM
My photo avatar here is now the same as my facebook one so now everyone can see. 

If people don't like it that don't bother me I do what I want dammit.

Lovely [emoji4]


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Quote from: elobo on March 27, 2017, 03:10:20 PM
where is  the "Do I pass" thread

i think it got lost cuz everyone post here now .

It was removed because of excessive blood loss.

That sounds horrible. What does because of excessive blood loss even mean?

Quote from: Jalynn on March 28, 2017, 01:14:46 AM
That sounds horrible. What does because of excessive blood loss even mean?

Just a guess, but maybe internet boxing matches.  Basically people creating bad blood because of the responses sent.

AKA fighting

Quote from: Artesia on March 28, 2017, 04:39:26 AM
Just a guess, but maybe internet boxing matches.  Basically people creating bad blood because of the responses sent.

AKA fighting

What tends to happen is the thread implodes and the Moderators clean it up and restore the status quo and then away we go again, the thread implodes due to some uncaring comment. or someone gets told something they don't wean to hear...and th4 list goes on.........as Artesia said.....AKA Fighting

Quote from: Moomin on March 20, 2017, 07:33:57 AM
Hey lovlies! Slight update from over 2.5 months on hormones! Boobs and bum have really filled out! I was slightly worried that losing weight for the hormone clinic would effect my passing ability, but everything seems fine! I'm at the clinic tomorrow, if my levels have balanced out from HRT, I should get the go ahead for lower surgery, yay! Had to add the Betsey Johnson handbag I just got, for you  Ashley! My friend Gem thought I looked like a Pinup Wanda, from wheres Wolly/Waldo lol Xx

Every time I log in... Every time!  You're going to make me go broke!  Wonderful pictures Moomin!

finally got my ears pierced after being a chicken for so long!

congratulations Korra!  Piercings are not that bad... it's the leaving them in to keep the holes open that kills me.  Ha  ha ha ha...  Looking good by the way.

I want to get my ears re-pierced.  I took out the last studs I wore when I started playing roller derby eight years ago.  I was recently cleaning up my room and came across all of my earrings, and I cannot wear any of them anymore   So I think as I aproach the end of my derby career, it might be time for some new piercings.  Thanks for the inspiration Korra!!  Looking great BTW 

Quote from: ElizabethK on March 28, 2017, 06:41:57 AM
What tends to happen is the thread implodes and the Moderators clean it up and restore the status quo and then away we go again, the thread implodes due to some uncaring comment. or someone gets told something they don't wean to hear...and th4 list goes on.........as Artesia said.....AKA Fighting

I'll try this again, since I mistakenly deleted my post.....

I believe a safe place for truly honest constructive criticism is important for this forum.  If you can't ask your peers (that are going through the same hardships), who can you ask and expect honest feedback?  The rule should be that if you post in that thread, expect honesty, but it can still be done in a kind and respectful way.  All too often there is "too much" support just to make people feel good when it's way outside of reality, and people get a delusional image of themselves.  Propping up someone in a lie is just as damaging as telling them the honest truth.

Quote from: Jalynn on March 28, 2017, 01:14:46 AM
That sounds horrible. What does because of excessive blood loss even mean?

means that you will never get honest review on passing on this website.  I think it is clear 

I'm lucky that I hold no delusions of how I look.  I look like a guy in a dress, well skirt.  I am really hoping HRT hurries up and gets done changing me.  If someone told me I'm ugly, well, that's what I have thought all my life about myself.  I'm hoping for a good transition, at least the meds make me feel better.

there's also the fact that pictures aren't an accurate representation of if someone passes or not. you can look not flattering or take a bad pic and people will just go off that and say no pass, and on the opposite end of the spectrum you can only post perfectly angled pictures in flattering lighting and get a pass every time but still get gendered male 100% of the time in person to strangers.

there's so much more to passing than just looks. I mean obviously it's a big part of it, but not the end all be all since it's a combination of voice mannerisms posture clothing and general appearance that decides it. the best way to know if you pass or not is to go out in public and see how you're gendered.

keep in mind this isn't a shot at anyone just my point of view on the subject based on my little bit of experience out there. compliments are all well and nice and everyone needs some at times but all the nice words in the world won't make you go from unpassing to passing that's the harsh reality of things. sucks passing is perception based but we can't really dictate someone else's perception ya know?

I went to Texas last week to lobby the Texas House on SB 6 (the Texas bathroom bill). I went with with Olivia (a former forum member) and meet with a number of offices. It was a pretty productive day and it looks like there is not much enthusiasm in the Texas House for the bill. While we were there the Republican Speaker came out against the bill. I then got to spend the weekend at a friends house enjoying her pool. It felt fabulous to be be out advocating for our community and we looked good doing it.

Quote from: staciM on March 28, 2017, 02:48:24 PM
I believe a safe place for truly honest constructive criticism is important for this forum.

I didn't remove the thread but I agree with the decision to remove it. Often I saw things that boiled down to without FFS your never going to pass. FFS might be so expensive that the member may not be able to afford it for years. Other times I would see an account up for deletion. Tracing back the posting history, I would find the last post was made in the do I pass thread. Still other times, I would see a bad review and PM the member to help calm them down. Cindy normally gives final approval on account deletions and I have PMed her requesting she not approve deletions because of this.

If constructive criticism was always given, it would be another story but I feel the thread was often causing as much hurt as it was helpful. For a long time I thought the name of the thread should more like "How can I improve my image?" with restrictions limiting it to affordable solutions. Not all of us will be attractive or passable and those who are not need even more support from the site.

What about creating a single and only thread where people would post image and simply name it :

"Pictures of us 2017 "   something like that.  ?? 


I think everyone here are fabulous for having courage to post but i dont think everyone "look fabulous"

Quote from: Artesia on March 28, 2017, 03:31:27 PM
I'm lucky that I hold no delusions of how I look.  I look like a guy in a dress, well skirt.  I am really hoping HRT hurries up and gets done changing me.  If someone told me I'm ugly, well, that's what I have thought all my life about myself.  I'm hoping for a good transition, at least the meds make me feel better.

I just see a very happy looking person.   

Hugs, Devlyn

Quote from: elobo on March 28, 2017, 03:28:45 PM

means that you will never get honest review on passing on this website.  I think it is clear 

I think I speak for every honest person on this site when I say we resent your remark.