I am 24 I have had thoughts of would rather of been born a woman all my life but played with the hand I've been dealt but after much internal struggling I end up here, but only after I basically burnt my life down and fell in love with someone who truly believes that my body matches my soul.

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So yeah i am lost of what to do next

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Welcome. I'm in somewhat same situation. My husband is not gay. I am male. But he believes I'm woman.

I slowly transform myself to be me. I have not started hormones yet. Nor seen a gender therapist.

I feel guilty because I have a good life but I am unhappy because I am not myself.

Welcome to Susan's Place. Where to start is pretty much up to you. If I were to suggest a starting point, it would be to see a gender therapist as you appear to be a bit unsure of yourself. Others would say to start experimenting with a feminine wardrobe. Still others might suggest HRT or morphing to a more feminine appearance in stages. There is no set way to transition so you can start anywhere and add tasks in as needed. Once you start, you can stop if you are uncomfortable with whats happening so dipping your toes in the water doesn't mean you have to jump in. The question for you is where do you want to start? Let us know and we will tell you how to do it.

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Welcome Zquence!  Ditto to Dena on the therapist as a first stop.  As you may already know, and will as you read on in the forum, there are many paths to choose from, or maybe even forging your own new and unique one.  It's important to understand the source of your feelings and also to consider what constraints you may have in your particular situation.  I believe it's a good idea to follow the discussion in forum areas that pique your interest, as there are many people here in various stages of all kinds of transitions and in static situations as well. 

Best of luck to you and congratulations for taking the step of joining this community!  I look forward to hearing more of your story. 

Erin

Is there a way to talk to one with low cost, i don't have much money

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Some therapist work on a sliding scale where you pay what you can afford. If you have insurance, it may be covered under your insurance policy but you have to read all the details of the policy to know.

And is there away to talk to one online my village doesn't have many resources

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There are doctors who treat people on line with Skype. You might want to look at the links portion of the site and see if there is a doctor that's located in a reasonable time zone.

I'm on mobile using an app for the forum. Is the site mobile friendly?

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I need more power than a mobile device offers so I only use this site with my tower or laptop computer. Many use Tapatalk as the site is compatible with it however some of the functionality is different than it would be on a regular computer. It boils down to what you have available and what you are comfortable with.

Just my phone for now until I get Wi-Fi

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