A little bit of context: I'm MTF and attracted to men, haven't transitioned yet. All my life living as a gay man I always felt I wasn't man enough and I would get especially jealous when I felt my partner was attracted to men who were very masculine and/or muscular, because I didn't look like them and also because in my mind, it put my SO in a position of submission and I hated that.

Fast forward to today and I got so jealous for the dumbest thing. My boyfriend liked a picture of some random muscular tall and extra masculine model on social media and I flipped out; deep inside I knew I was being dramatic but couldn't help it...It finally made me realize that the reason I get so jealous about it is because I perceive he wants something I won't be able to provide, and something I don't wanna provide. So it's a weird situation of I'm jealous at the muscular guy but I don't want to be the muscular guy cuz I want to look like a girl and I will, but it's still difficult to perceive that the person you love is drooling over someone you will never be and are with each day are further away from. By the way he knows I'm trans and is supportive but has told me the relationship will probably finish at some point (which I understand and agree with).

Any similar experiences?

If he's flat out telling you the relationship will end, he doesn't sound very supportive to me. A metaphor: He bought the new car last year now he's waiting for the new models to hit the show room floor before he trades it in. He seriously doesn't sound like he's in to you anymore. I would say cut your losses and move on.

Jealousy is part of human nature. I look at women that my wife will never look like, if you gave me a choice between my wife and the super model, I'd pick my wife every time. My wife will never be a super model, but she is the love my life. The point I am trying to make is, we all look at person x and say wow their attractive, it does not mean we want our partner to look like that. We tend to forget it is what is on the inside that matters.

Quote from: Jennifer RachaelAnn on May 31, 2017, 07:30:44 PM
If he's flat out telling you the relationship will end, he doesn't sound very supportive to me. A metaphor: He bought the new car last year now he's waiting for the new models to hit the show room floor before he trades it in. He seriously doesn't sound like he's in to you anymore. I would say cut your losses and move on.

No no, don't be so quick to judge. He's very into me, he demonstrates it everyday...things are not black and white and I don't know if my initial post made it seem otherwise but he's very loving and our sex life is as great as ever (sorry if TMI). What he said is that there will be a point when I will look like a woman and that's most likely when we will drift apart at least romantically since he's a 100% into men. But until then he's with me, supporting me and being loyal because he loves me for me. that's what he said and demonstrated. It's fair, I cannot pretend he will always be into me if I completely change the way I look to another gender he's not attracted to.


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Quote from: Erika_Courtney on May 31, 2017, 07:47:01 PM
Jealousy is part of human nature. I look at women that my wife will never look like, if you gave me a choice between my wife and the super model, I'd pick my wife every time. My wife will never be a super model, but she is the love my life. The point I am trying to make is, we all look at person x and say wow their attractive, it does not mean we want our partner to look like that. We tend to forget it is what is on the inside that matters.

Makes sense. It's just a trigger for me especially now that I'm starting my transition and will look less and less like what he's naturally attracted to.


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