I've had a bit of a struggle over the last month or so dealing with the mental aspects of living with cancer. I was also struggling with my limited movement as my shoulders and neck suffered collateral damage during surgery.

I started physiotherapy and after a few trials, my physio started me in the hospital gym on exercises to strengthen my shoulders. They have worked wonders, not only on my movement but also for my positivity.

Today I had my speech valve replaced - without anaesthetic- yea! Power of meditation! Imagine someone keeping their finger in your throat and pressing for an hour on one spot and you get the idea; they needed to dilate the hole. Why my life involves holes requiring dilation I have no idea 

I also had a full physical and endoscopic examination of my throat surgery and the report was 'You have made a remarkable recovery' I was going to say something but my new speech valve blocked and so I was reduced to writing on my whiteboard. So much for science!

I have now been cleared to re-join my regular gym. Tomorrow I start with an assessment with a PT with a list of what I can and cannot do from my physio's. The last time I was there was 3 months after chemo/rad and I could feel the cancer regrowing as I worked out. I think I tried to fight the negative thoughts with exercise. This time I'm doing it with joy and happiness and thinking that this is a really good time to buy some new hot exercise gear!! I have a body I'm proud of so watch me shine!

I've been talking to my psychiatrist about dealing with the mental aspects of cancer and that is helping. I never realised that having to go to a psychiatrist for gender therapy would prove so useful. I needed no assistance in my gender identity but lots with helping deal with past traumas and now having her available for this issue has been lovely. Just like talking to a friend who can offer some practical help.

Why did I post this? No real idea except to say Hi! I'm happy and coping well with life; that there is a happy place at the end of the transition and that 'he' would not have coped at all. In my case transitioning saved me, it wasn't easy but looking back, it is a dim past and of no consequence.

Cindy,
   Glad to hear things are looking up. Can't imagine how hard that was. You have such a strength. Guess it proves the old saying about girls  rule, boys drool. My hopes for your continued improvement.
Moni

 Hi Cindy,

  Thank you for the update. It's been a bit since we have talked and I'm sorry it has been. I felt a connection with you over our similar histories. From  my point of view it is no wonder things have screwed with your head and I am glad you psychiatrist is really helping your with that. I am also glad other aspects of your life are looking good. Keep moving in that direction.

Hugs,
   Laurie

Cindy, that sounds like some really good progress. You stay strong!

Great to hear you so positive....I would say look out your regular Jim gym!  Thanks for letting us know how you are doing

good to hear

Cindy,  thank you for sharing. I'm sure you'll be kicking butt in the gym real soon. X

Sent from my MI 5s using Tapatalk

So I had my first session at the commercial gym. I also used the female change room, there were no issues and no one blinked an eye at me. Well they did but everyone stares at my breathing hole in my neck in a furtive manner and look away quickly so as either not to upset me or more likely to not upset themselves. I'm at peace with it now. I'm even designing some jewellery for it but that is another story.

I had a lovely female PT who went through a routine for me and of course I modified it straight away, doubled the repetitions and increased the weights and threw in a few more exercises - as I tend to do.
At the end of the session I was tired and sore and coincidentally called into my Pharmacy to get my pain killers, I needed a clearance on the script so messaged my surgeon and threw in my adventures at the gym to let him know how I was doing.

The response:
Yep .... Miss OIAKB
"overdo it and know better"

I was rather pleased!  The pharmacy staff seemed to find all of this highly amusing for some reason and was wondering if I wanted to include a crate of DencoRub on my order. I gave a huff and bought a lipstick instead.

Now I'm sitting in the sun, sipping on a wine and can't move my arms.

All good!

Thanks for the laugh Cindy.

Arms are overrated! How are you managing to sip the wine?

Sent from my MI 5s using Tapatalk

Quote from: Cindy on October 20, 2017, 02:34:44 AM
Now I'm sitting in the sun, sipping on a wine and can't move my arms.

All good!

So long as you got the first part of the action accomplished there is not need to remove it from your lips...I have heard of getting legless...but once again leave it to Cindy to rewrite the rules 

Quote from: Cindy on October 20, 2017, 02:34:44 AM
Now I'm sitting in the sun, sipping on a wine and can't move my arms.

The best exercise is bending the elbow!    But if you can't move your arms...?  Houston, we have a problem.

Glad to hear you are feeling well.

You sound so positive, great for you

Quote from: Lany1209 on October 20, 2017, 07:31:50 AM
You sound so positive, great for you

Hi Lany,

  I'm Laurie. I see that you've managed to sneak in here and get a couple posts in without getting caught. Well that certainly won't do. Welcome to Susan's place. The door is open so you might as well get yourself all the way in here and out of the cold. I hope you have come here to join us in our conversations and want to get to know us a bit better as we get to know you. Perhaps I can even get you to hop on over to the Introductions Thread and  create a post to tell us a little bit more about yourself so we can get to know you a little better and greet you properly.

  Also I'll add some links and information below that can help you get more out of our site. Please take time to become familiar with them especially the RED one as we are always getting questions that are answered there.

Laurie
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Cindy, so great to see you strengthening your shoulders from surgery the best way with physical therapy/exercise.  I cannot imagine how challenging this all is... wow.  And cheers, literally.

Hi Cindy wow, what adversity.  So happy you are pulling through.  This makes me feel small, I'm worried about passing and you are surviving cancer!  Cheers to you.  Well deserved cocktail.

Bari Jo

Great your on the mend