I'm 40. When I was 25 I reached a point in my life where I figured that I'd done everything I needed to. I was struggling with what I now know was GD, and was ready to end my life. I had a solid job, a home, but life was empty and held no challenge for me.
I changed up my career, and over the next 12 years moved home, met a partner and started a family.
Three years ago I faced the trans monster I'd had on my back, and now I live full-time, happily, my social transition complete.
But what is left?
I'm still in my children's lives to a small extent, but if I wasn't here tomrrow, I'm not sure much would change.
I've always treated life like a game, never taken it seriously, it's far too bizzare. But like any game, if you've played enough times, it's no fun any more.
I find my head back in that space that it was in 15 years ago. I'm not depressed, my life is pretty good right now, I'm just trying to find valid reasons to carry on; there is no challenge, where do I go from here?
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