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Parallels in Transition

Started by Toni O, November 12, 2017, 11:36:54 PM

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Toni O

 1. Denial and isolation
2. Anger
3. Bargaining
4. Depression
5. Acceptance.
People do not necessarily go through the stages in the same order or experience all of them.

I bet you thought these were these were the stages of emotion we go through in transition. They sure sound familiar don't they!

When I was working on my undergrad degree, (Sociology) we covered these. They are the five stages of  bereavement that people experience when faced with death or terminal illness. (Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, "On Death and Dying")

To many of us, in transition, the experience is very similar. It is after all the death of our former selves as males. I experienced every one of them! It took me years to achieve acceptance and THIS is one of the reasons you hear me carry on about "Where are you on your journey?"

I thought you might find the analogy interesting. Remember, its just my own conclusion and I'm not an expert in anybody's transition other than my own. But if you are feeling some of the discomforts and the roller coaster ride I did, just know....its ok...it's natural and its "normal". It is the result of you facing your inner self. 
Toni⚘
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Meghan

I'm look forward to my rollercoaster ride as I about to begin my transition two weeks from now. I don't think it will be a easy going forward but I look forward to what will transform me in the future.

Sent from my XT1650 using Tapatalk

Meghan Pham: MtF Transgender, Transsexual, Transwoman, social justice, Caregivers, Certified Nurse Assistant
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Bari Jo

#2
I'm not sure I'd call these stages in transition.  For me it's the stages we go through before transitioning.  Once I got to acceptance, I was fine transitioning.  Maybe that's unique?

Bari Jo
you know how far the universe extends outward? i think i go inside just as deep.

10/11/18 - out to the whole world.  100% friends and family support.
11/6/17 - came out to sister, best day of my life
9/5/17 - formal diagnosis and stopping DIY in favor if prescribed HRT
6/18/17 - decided to stop fighting the trans beast, back on DIY.
Too many ups and downs, DIY, purges of self inbetween dates.
Age 10 - suppression and denial began
Age 8 - knew I was different
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Jailyn

It's a great analogy and fits perfectly for me. I can go through those steps you listed and can pinpoint that I went through that step at some point in my journey. I has taken me a while to do so but, made it. This is not just the grieving steps, I remember this for my psychology 101 class being steps also for recognizing when you have a problem like alcoholism. They may not use the same terms but, it was similar steps that happened. So yeah good one!!!!
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Denise

In my case some of these phases overlapped but strangely enough, I went through them in lightning speed - 2 months.  It was a window of time that I stopped HRT before restarting.
1st Person out: 16-Oct-2015
Restarted Spironolactone 26-Aug-2016
Restarted Estradiol Valerate: 02-Nov-2016
Full time: 02-Mar-2017
Breast Augmentation (Schechter): 31-Oct-2017
FFS (Walton in Chicago): 25-Sep-2018
Vaginoplasty (Schechter): 13-Dec-2018









A haiku in honor of my grandmother who loved them.
The Voices are Gone
Living Life to the Fullest
I am just Denise
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Toni

Thankfully, I kind of went from #1 right to #5, followed by a maybe #6-Peace? 
     I also like to think about three steps to acceptance of a new idea, especially as it relates to Society:  1. Denial, 2. Violent Resistance 3. Acceptance as an undeniable truth.  It's #2 that gives me pause these days since I see a softening of resistance and even broader acceptance on many fronts, but a scary resurgence of hostility in a newly energized segment of conservatism.  Toni
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Laurie

  I think I've gotten all 5 down in reference to having a terminal disease  (twice) and death.(yet to come)

As for transition I seem to be stuck at 4.
April 13, 2019 switched to estradiol valerate
December 20, 2018    Referral sent to OHSU Dr Dugi  for vaginoplasty consult
December 10, 2018    Second Letter VA Psychiatric Practical nurse
November 15, 2018    First letter from VA therapist
May 11, 2018 I am Laurie Jeanette Wickwire
May   3, 2018 Submitted name change forms
Aug 26, 2017 another increase in estradiol
Jun  26, 2017 Last day in male attire That's full time I guess
May 20, 2017 doubled estradiol
May 18, 2017 started electrolysis
Dec   4, 2016 Started estradiol and spironolactone



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Daniellekai

I skipped anger, but that pretty much sums it up! I've accepted it, just trying to match behavioral, social, and physical changes so that nothing seems too out of place as I transition now...


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