I went to the long awaited first assessment in Leeds yesterday. I didn't feel out of place, despite not looking like I was trans. Sat there with stubble, boots, thick coat and short hair. Spoke to some lovely trans people in the waiting room. People younger, people older, some parents of patients, some friends.
I saw the head of the gender services there, and she was lovely. We chatted for about an hour, and she's convinced I have gender dysphoria. I still have to have a second assessment with a doctor to confirm things with a second opinion. but she's certain I am. Everything we talked about was apparently textbook of all the other trans people who come through.
I'm relieved to know Im not insane, that Im not deluded or crazy like my family make me feel. I am actually trans, according to someone with an authority on the matter.