I know this may not be in topic but I do apologize....lately I have been asking myself if this guy who is in my life.....if I love him.....he and I dated for 4 months in 2016. We broke it off because he didnt know if he could fall in love with me and he had feelings for another girl plus I was dealing with my own questioning.....our friendship began in 2015. Currently we are not speaking....he is icing me out....and it makes me cry...I ask myself......if I have fallen in love with this man and my heart just doesnt let me feel it. Him not speaking to me......it makes me cry...

When you put his needs before your own, and panic when thinking of life without him, then you have found love. If he does not feel the same towards you, it is time to rethink what made you feel that way towards him.

Quote from: Lady Sarah on January 08, 2018, 11:49:49 PM
When you put his needs before your own, and panic when thinking of life without him, then you have found love. If he does not feel the same towards you, it is time to rethink what made you feel that way towards him.

What do you mean "made me feel that way towards him"? I cry when he doesnt talk to me.....

To me, love is care. Passion becomes love if the relationship develops that way.

You can love friends in a non-romantic way. I love my friends and I love my husband and kids in different ways.

If he makes you cry, maybe you love him. But how do you love him? As a friend or partner-to-be? Maybe you miss him and that is why you cry.

Remember though. Old romantic fantasies are just fantasies. I have several examples of romantic fantasies that crumble when the persons try again. Things happen in life all the time that make you and everyone else develop in different ways. Not saying forget him, just be causious, your memories are memories and not where he och you are today.


Tony

I feel empty when she is not around, and as if I could move the world when she is there.  I am willing to dance with her, but NO ONE else has been able to get me to dance since 1993, she's teaching me.  I think she is more beautiful than every person I've ever seen.  I crave her smile, I feel her laugh, I love to just sit and stare into her eyes.  When she speaks it's as a song.  A touch, and I melt into her hand.  I would stop a bullet for her.  I would do....everything for her.

I miss my girlfriend so much Absence truly does make the heart grow fonder.

I have been in love atleast once, i remember i couldnt wait to see him, to be with him, and have been sad when we stopped our thing, still took me a long time to get over him.. omg we remained friends for awhile after and he got hotter, and i just couldnt stop thinking about him for along time, even after we stopped being friends it was kind of embarrassing TBH LOL, i also started to wonder if we would still be together if i was female 

For me its been both......trying to understand just somewhere in my heart I love him.....because for some reason somehow......either my heart wont let me feel it......or all of this is made up in my head that I dont love him...

Love = person has an equal or greater consideration in your life as yourself and your own needs

In love = a chemical/hormonal high associated with a particular person

Lovesick = missing someone you can't or don't have, to the point of it affecting your life

No-one can answer this for someone else, it's up to you to figure out which one it is.

I am not a romantic. I cannot answer specifically to you. I can summarize for me.

If you ask if you're crazy, you probably aren't; If you have to ask if you're in love ....

If you miss someone when they aren't around, they're a friend. If you feel incomplete when they aren't around .....

I know I am. I don't wonder, I don't question, I KNOW.

So many ways to help indicate and express, how it relates to you is unique.

I can only speak for myself with this.

I have fallen in love with very few people in my life. I could count them on one hand, actually. I'm a Scorpio. I know a lot of people don't believe in astrology, but it describes me extremely well. Uncannily well, to be honest. When I fall for someone I fall for them hard. Like... it's all consuming. It's different to platonic love because it drives my senses and emotions utterly and completely haywire. To the point where they're all I can think about. I think that's probably more just me than how it actually is. But for me it's like the whole world disappears and the person I love is the only thing in the world. Our relationship is the only thing in the world. I would do anything for them. Happily take a bullet for them. Maybe to the point of obsession, which probably isn't so good. But it's like all my attention and focus is on the person in question. Like a laser.

It's like... someone put my emotions through an amplifier and jacked it all the way to 11. Every moment with them is like being in an electrical storm. Everything tingles and buzzes. Everything feels alive.

For the last few months to a year I have been trying to figure out if this man I have fallen in love with...

I am sorry to anyone who thinks my topic for this thread is weird. Just the past year or so I have been trying to understand my feelings for this guy I know. He and I dated for 4 months in 2016. We broke up for reasons I will not go into....but....he and I are not speaking....and somehow......him not talking to me and him just ignoring me and walking on by me......it just brings me to tears.....as stupid as that sounds....I just want to know in my heart if there is any love at all for him.....

Sorry for the ethereal answer here, but it's something you just know.  It can't be measured or contained.  That said, I think I'd be a bit distraught if any friend just started giving me the cold shoulder/snub.

If you have to ask us if you have fallen in love with someone, you probably haven't?

Quote from: rmaddy on January 13, 2018, 01:03:54 AM
If you have to ask us if you have fallen in love with someone, you probably haven't?

I feel

When you can't think of surviving without them. When you stop eating for days because you've been hanging out and can't get them out of your mind. You enjoy their company more than anyone you know. You start making plans for a future with someone, you want to spend life with. You let little things that bug you pass without comment. You look forward to old age with the one you love even if it's 50 years away. Nothing makes you feel better than making them happy. It's no longer being selfish, you begin to think as one. When you reach my age you realize you could not have had a better life with anyone else. You communicate. In my opinion, sex is way down the list. Intimacy is much more important.

I feel stupid.

Quote from: rmaddy on January 13, 2018, 01:03:54 AM
If you have to ask us if you have fallen in love with someone, you probably haven't?

I feel stupid...

Quote from: BJ0909 on January 13, 2018, 11:26:12 AM
I feel stupid...

Actually, that is one of the more reliable symptoms of being in love--constantly catching yourself daydreaming, neglecting your work, being unable to concentrate.  People get amazingly stupid for awhile when they fall in love.  If the love survives and matures, they may, someday, regain their senses, at least to some extent.

Look hon...you'll know when you have.

Quote from: rmaddy on January 13, 2018, 06:00:47 PM
Actually, that is one of the more reliable symptoms of being in love--constantly catching yourself daydreaming, neglecting your work, being unable to concentrate.  People get amazingly stupid for awhile when they fall in love.  If the love survives and matures, they may, someday, regain their senses, at least to some extent.

Look hon...you'll know when you have.

I mean I feel stupid for asking.....