I'm not sure where to post this.

Something is happening. I've been out for quite a while, but I've only been presenting full-time for about a month. I don't pass. But I'm finding that being trans in a largely cis world is becoming anti-climactic. The drama is leaving my situation like air from a spent balloon. To be sure, I don't invite confrontation or rejection; I don't go out looking for connections with strangers. I tend to avoid looking them in the eyes. But when I must interact with other people, I find many of them at least neutral toward me, and more than I expected accepting. I am correctly gendered by total strangers on a regular basis, although it's obvious I'm trans. People are nicer than I thought they would be.

On those occasions when I hear laughter in my vicinity, usually from younger guys or men from a more macho culture, it doesn't phase me; I think, "They just don't understand; they're the benighted ones." I don't get a charge out of being different, and I don't feel afraid because I'm different. I'm just me. Being a non-passing trans woman in a cis society is becoming normal. Life is moving on.

In fact, the subject itself is becoming tiresome. I have an ally at my full-time job, my first ally, to whom I will always be grateful. I told her the other day, "I'm tired of talking about this." And I am. I'm ready to move on.

Life is more than being trans. My issues now are women's issues, not trans issues. Makeup, hair and my weight are the things that concern me. Most women have an area in their life that creates special challenges for them; mine is being trans. But that doesn't mean I have to be obsessed with the cause; it's more productive to focus on solutions.

I think Susan's is a great venue. I didn't have a support group when I came out to myself. I found the trans sub->-bleeped-<-s on ->-bleeped-<- an invaluable resource. I learned most of what I know about being trans from them. ->-bleeped-<- is an amazing resource.  But Susan's is a community. When I felt the need for community, I came here. I know that talk is cheap; but if I ever have money, I'm going to send Susan a nice check. This site is a ministry, and it deserves support.

But I don't think I'll be here as often any more. I'll check in from time to time, of course. Some of the women here are awesome, and I would love to meet them in person. One in particular. But it's time to get back to life.

For what it's worth: to all you emerging girls, so scared of what lies ahead ... I've been where you are, I've felt what you've felt; and, believe me, what you fear is nothing. Nothing. Embrace who you are as soon as you can, in whatever ways you can. Nothing is as important as being authentic, as being true to yourself.

May the Goddess bless you all.

Ann,

Thank you for the Inspiration!

Hi Ann. Thanks for the great post. 

To be female is in your soul. For me, it makes me smile everyday, that's what counts. The outside is irrelevant.

I am glad that you made it to this point. 🙂 There will be someone here for support if you ever need a little.

Really, transition should not last forever. Eventually we all stop thinking about it and go on with our lives. It has been a long time since I thought about my personal transition, other than surgery, the rest of the whole life thing is more than enough to think about.

I stick around because I have a ludicrous belief that I am helping people. 😊 Someday soon I will probably give up on that notion and drift away. I also will always be grateful for Susan's, and the many characters that have helped me along the way.

Take care.

Quote from: FinallyMichelle on March 20, 2018, 10:00:37 PM
I am glad that you made it to this point. 🙂 There will be someone here for support if you ever need a little.

Really, transition should not last forever. Eventually we all stop thinking about it and go on with our lives. It has been a long time since I thought about my personal transition, other than surgery, the rest of the whole life thing is more than enough to think about.

I stick around because I have a ludicrous belief that I am helping people. 😊 Someday soon I will probably give up on that notion and drift away. I also will always be grateful for Susan's, and the many characters that have helped me along the way.

Take care.

Michelle,

I do not believe your belief is ludicrous.  In fact while reading it I was inspired by the thought of the lyrics to an oldie but good, Turn Turn Turn by the Byrds.

"Turn! Turn! Turn!"

To everything - turn, turn, turn
There is a season - turn, turn, turn
And a time to every purpose under heaven

A time to be born, a time to die
A time to plant, a time to reap
A time to kill, a time to heal
A time to laugh, a time to weep

To everything - turn, turn, turn
There is a season - turn, turn, turn
And a time to every purpose under heaven

A time to build up, a time to break down
A time to dance, a time to mourn
A time to cast away stones
A time to gather stones together

To everything - turn, turn, turn
There is a season - turn, turn, turn
And a time to every purpose under heaven

A time of love, a time of hate
A time of war, a time of peace
A time you may embrace
A time to refrain from embracing

To everything - turn, turn, turn
There is a season - turn, turn, turn
And a time to every purpose under heaven

A time to gain, a time to lose
A time to rend, a time to sew
A time for love, a time for hate
A time for peace, I swear it's not too late!

And has most know, some of the lyrics are direct quotes from the Bible.

Now that I have given you the impression I'm a religious zealot, I'm really not but I do believe that things often happen for a purpose that we may not understand and that there's a big plan and purpose for us all.

All said, you have inspired me as have others on this site.  Some more than others but regardless, even one small thing can change the course of an entire direction.

Thank you for being here!

😊 Touche.

Ecclesiastes 3? I think in that chapter is also the verse about; from dust we came and to dust we shall return. I hated the final verse when I was young but that was probably because I could not imagine then anything worth while coming from my life. Wherefore I perceive that there is nothing better, than that a man should rejoice in his own works; for that is his portion, there was a little more but that is all I remember.

Also not a religious zealot, just the lingering glimpses of a misspent youth. 😉

Curse you! 😆 I liked it better when I thought I was useless, much less responsibility. Lol

Quote from: FinallyMichelle on March 21, 2018, 02:04:11 AM
😊 Touche.

Ecclesiastes 3? I think in that chapter is also the verse about; from dust we came and to dust we shall return. I hated the final verse when I was young but that was probably because I could not imagine then anything worth while coming from my life. Wherefore I perceive that there is nothing better, than that a man should rejoice in his own works; for that is his portion, there was a little more but that is all I remember.

Also not a religious zealot, just the lingering glimpses of a misspent youth. 😉

Curse you! 😆 I liked it better when I thought I was useless, much less responsibility. Lol

LOL - You cursing me made my morning

QuoteI do not believe your belief is ludicrous.  In fact while reading it I was inspired by the thought of the lyrics to an oldie but good, Turn Turn Turn by the Byrds.

Written by Pete Seeger

Cool, I didn't know he wrote the song.  Still am a big Byrds fan

Quote from: Cassi on March 21, 2018, 12:08:53 PM
Cool, I didn't know he wrote the song.  Still am a big Byrds fan

He wrote a lot of songs that other performed, such as Where Have All The Flowers Gone, as done by Peter, Paul & Mary and The Kingston Trio.  He also brought in folk songs from around the world, such as The Lion Sleeps Tonight, sung by The Tokens.  He also inspired many musicians to play the banjo.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pete_Seeger

Quote from: AnneK on March 21, 2018, 12:18:37 PM
He wrote a lot of songs that other performed, such as Where Have All The Flowers Gone, as done by Peter, Paul & Mary and The Kingston Trio.  He also brought in folk songs from around the world, such as The Lion Sleeps Tonight, sung by The Tokens.  He also inspired many musicians to play the banjo.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pete_Seeger

I remember first hearing where have all the flowers gone in the music portion of my sixth grade class back in 65'

Quote from: Cassi on March 21, 2018, 01:10:29 PM
I remember first hearing where have all the flowers gone in the music portion of my sixth grade class back in 65'

I have the Kingston Trio and Peter, Paul & Mary versions on CD as well as on my tablet and phone.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=487TPrQ7uW8&list=RD487TPrQ7uW8&index=1

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nUnD_ffBIDI&index=21&list=RD487TPrQ7uW8

Quote from: AnneK on March 21, 2018, 01:19:33 PM






I have the Kingston Trio and Peter, Paul & Mary versions on CD as well as on my tablet and phone.

I've worked on replacing all my cds and dvds and digitizing and placing on external hard drives (XHD).  So much easier to find a movie when you can put 1000 on an XHD and even moreso for music.  I have more music than I can count, both mp3 song/music files and if available the actual performances from the 60's and earlier.

Well, if we're talking Viet Namm...



This was the theme music from the TV show "Tour of Duty".

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tour_of_Duty_(TV_series)

And::::::



Had a crush on McMurphy, lol

Of course, one of many reasons for me starting my 12 year adventure was (thanks Gene Roddenberry):