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Your relationship with your face?

Started by PurpleWolf, March 19, 2018, 03:32:53 PM

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0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Cassi

Quote from: Julia1996 on March 21, 2018, 02:04:11 AM
Are you sure its not the CASSI effect? I can easily picture you pulling jokes like that on unsuspecting people. Lol.😂😂

Hummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
HRT since 1/04/2018
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Sarah_P

I've never been happy with my face, at least not until a few months ago when I started really seeing a woman hiding in there. Now it really doesn't bother me much (usually). I wouldn't mind getting my nose and protruding forehead reduced - I really don't like my sunken eyes. Of course, I can't hardly bear to look at myself on the days I have to grow out the hair for electrolysis.
--Sarah P

There's a world out there, just waiting
If you only let go what's inside
Live every moment, give it your all, enjoy the ride
- Stan Bush, The Journey



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Kylo

Quote from: Chelsea1807 on March 20, 2018, 10:17:45 PM
Wow thats awsome.   I'm still at 122hz  :laugh:

Chelsea

Been meaning to check that app out for a while too on my other phone, been a while since I looked at my voice pitch



"If the freedom of speech is taken away, then dumb and silent we may be led, like sheep to the slaughter."
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Colleen_definitely

T works for you, wow!


As for my face and I, it's a pretty good one.  I don't hate it any more, though there was a time...
Despite getting along pretty well I still told a doc "Take a grinder to this, that, and along here, then tug on this part and for the love of god don't screw this up!"
As our ashes turn to dust, we shine like stars...
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meatwagon

if it were socially acceptable to wear a paper bag over my head at all times, I would.  I have been fighting the temptation to take a knife to my face for years.
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Allison S

Quote from: Kylo on March 22, 2018, 07:08:03 AM
Been meaning to check that app out for a while too on my other phone, been a while since I looked at my voice pitch


Wow I couldn't even get to that even if I tried! And I went through all male puberty plus some lol

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

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DawnOday

I've always focused on my face because at 6'4" 220 lbs there is no other way I fit in. I like my face in makeup. Always have. Even now at 66, I still see my face as gorgeous. With my finally long hair which I have scheduled to be cut next week. Maybe I'm twisted but I certainly do not see an ugly person looking back at me.  I love new clothes, which can be expensive. There is one shop on the internet where I wish I could get locked inside and try everything on. I can now fit a size 16 a few years ago it was 24.  Part of the reason I appreciate my face these days is because until I was about 25 I had raging zits. While the pock marks still show the makeup does a pretty good job of covering them up. No my face is not the source of my dysphoria. My concern is a little south.
Dawn Oday

It just feels right   :icon_hug: :icon_hug: :icon_kiss: :icon_kiss: :icon_kiss:

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First indication I was different- 1956 kindergarten
First crossdress - Asked mother to dress me in sisters costumes  Age 7
First revelation - 1982 to my present wife
First time telling the truth in therapy June 15, 2016
Start HRT Aug 2016
First public appearance 5/15/17



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November Fox

I felt the same way before HRT. It's just the way it is. HRT will definitely change your face - I have met no transmen who were on HRT  and had no change.

As a "girl" I had inherited my fathers' features and not happy about it, but those exact features are really working now. However, you know - your relationship with your face isn't just gender, it's age too among other things - emotions are eventually written on your skin.

Transitioning has accentuated some of the lines, especially forehead lines ("deep thought" lines), but I am cool with it - and although being pretty is frequently on a woman's mind (judging from my own experience), the importance of it kind of fades.
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Kylo

Quote from: Allison S on March 24, 2018, 05:08:19 PM
Wow I couldn't even get to that even if I tried! And I went through all male puberty plus some lol

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

I hope I'm using the app correctly. I read out the passage of writing it gave to the end, anyway.
"If the freedom of speech is taken away, then dumb and silent we may be led, like sheep to the slaughter."
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Cassi

Quote from: Kylo on March 24, 2018, 09:55:41 PM
I hope I'm using the app correctly. I read out the passage of writing it gave to the end, anyway.

So, in reading the passage did Dorian Grey get the girl?  Kidding.

It's a pretty good app.  I think Laurie turned me on to it and I even showed it to my speech therapist and she was impressed with both the recording as well as the way it keeps track of your progress.

I will usually ignore the reading and either sing or just talk.
HRT since 1/04/2018
  •  

WolfNightV4X1

I've told myself and have been told I look like my brother.  My face is a bit on the long,  angular side and I have thick eyebrows and plenty of stubble.  I'm very much masculine in features that I forgot what I've looked like before.

Its so normal I don't think of it anymore,  it's just my face,  a nice attractive face.


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epvanbeveren

This is a very great question/post.

I was just talking with a (cis-male) co-worker about possible FFS, which I currently don't think about ever doing. (money and pain)

I do have different feelings about my face, depending on my mood, and also greatly depending on how a particular picture looks. When I look in the mirror however, I am much happier with what I see, although there are still a lot of masculine features. Since 2003 or so I only have 4 facial pictures (passport and business headshot) of myself. After coming out and transitioning I probably have 4 pictures per hour. :)

I am not currently using make up to hide masculine features and bring out more feminine looks because I am doing electrolysis every Wednesday, and don't want to have possible skin issues.

Most of the time I am okay with my looks, but for example at work, where of course I am 100% out, I am holding back on my femininity a little. At home I have two 11x14 headshot portraits framed in a 16x20 frame displayed on top and next to my 55 inch TV, with a portrait on my mom and me in between. Every time I go to sleep or feel a little down, I look at these and feel much better. One of the two portraits is my avatar here.

Mood, looks and how I see my face are directly related to one and another. What also helps me a lot is when I am shopping or somewhere out and about, and I hear people referring to me as a lady. (or woman, female pronounce etc.)

I think 80% of the time I feel okay about my face. (that's without makeup)
I am a K. MacPhee girl, re-born on October 4 2017 in Raleigh/Durham NC. USA
I was AMAB on May 6 1963 in Dordrecht, the Netherlands.

OUT and proud - 2014
HRT - 2015
Legal - 2016
GRS - 2017

Full Time - 01/01/2015:
first day (01) of new life (01), '15 = opposite of 51 (my age at the time)

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Kylo

Quote from: Cassi on March 24, 2018, 10:03:21 PM
So, in reading the passage did Dorian Grey get the girl?  Kidding.

I think he got the artist on his lawn.
"If the freedom of speech is taken away, then dumb and silent we may be led, like sheep to the slaughter."
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MeTony

I used to hate the mirror. I tried to be the best wife and mom in the world while being deep in denial. My image in my head did not match my looks. I looked like a drag queen if I tried makeup or long hair.

Today I accept myself for who I am. My dysphoria is not about my face. It's about my gigantic chest.

I took two pics of me now on my balcony. Different angles. I am pretty happy about myself atm. I am pre T. I am excited to see what T can do to me. Maybe I'll get a beard. I'd like that.

https://imgur.com/a/6Biuy


Tony



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Julia1996

Quote from: MeTony on March 25, 2018, 08:58:21 AM
I used to hate the mirror. I tried to be the best wife and mom in the world while being deep in denial. My image in my head did not match my looks. I looked like a drag queen if I tried makeup or long hair.

Today I accept myself for who I am. My dysphoria is not about my face. It's about my gigantic chest.

I took two pics of me now on my balcony. Different angles. I am pretty happy about myself atm. I am pre T. I am excited to see what T can do to me. Maybe I'll get a beard. I'd like that.

https://imgur.com/a/6Biuy


Tony

Even without a beard you're quite passable. If I saw you in public I would definitely think you were a guy. And you're pre T. I think after T you will be 110% passable .
Julia


Born 1998
Started hrt 2015
SRS done 5/21/2018
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PurpleWolf

I have an add-on... :P
I just had a new passport shot taken - and I absolutely hate that pic! I just don't feel comfortable looking at it. And now it's gonna be on my IDs so have to show it to everyone - cringe x(! Well I bet pretty much everyone hates theirs... but somehow that just doesn't look like 'me'!

I'm thinking maybe I'm expecting to see a pic of an actual guy with beard and all? Like a pic of a cis guy I see in my head with my mind's eye...? I hate it when I look 'mtf' - that's my term for when I look sort of in-between... Obviously I don't look that feminine as I'm masculine in general, so I don't think I look like a woman per se. But then I don't look like a man either...! Just weirdish. It's because I use eyeliner etc. so sometimes I think I look like mtf early on in transition!

I'm not sure if others are able to see what I'm seeing in it! But it feels almost like a fake. I just have an uneasy feeling looking at that. Like it's hard to tell what gender I am.

The mtf feeling is hard to describe and not sure if others see my pics like that - but I'm not able to see a 'female' in my pics so I just see guy/male who's on HRT and on estrogen to become a woman and the makeup kinda accentuates that  :P. I especially hate the pics I look 'mtf' in!!! When I don't look like a girl even, but like something uneasy/weird... [And note: this in no way has to do anything with real mtfs/trans women! Just my way of describing to myself what's that weird ->-bleeped-<- I'm seeing...]

Aargh looking at that passport pic is driving me crazy!!! It just makes me feel like something is missing, like a beard or...  I hope others are unable to see what I'm seeing when they check my ID... x(((
!!!REBIRTH=legal name change on Feb 16th 2018!!!
This is where life begins for me. It's a miracle I finally got it done.


My body is the home of my soul; not the other way around.

I'm more than anything an individual; I'm too complex to be put in any box.

- A social butterfly not living in social isolation anymore  ;D -
(Highly approachable but difficult to grasp)


The past is overrated - why stick with it when you are able to recreate yourself every day
  •  

MeTony

I don't look like myself in my driver's license. It is 7 years old.  I always bring my work ID with me. It's 2 years old. The police looked at me and my driver's license three times before he accepted it was me and not stolen. LOL

I take it with ease. I think it is funny I don't look like myself at all.


Tony
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Julia1996

Quote from: PurpleWolf on March 25, 2018, 09:18:40 AM
I have an add-on... :P
I just had a new passport shot taken - and I absolutely hate that pic! I just don't feel comfortable looking at it. And now it's gonna be on my IDs so have to show it to everyone - cringe x(! Well I bet pretty much everyone hates theirs... but somehow that just doesn't look like 'me'!

I'm thinking maybe I'm expecting to see a pic of an actual guy with beard and all? Like a pic of a cis guy I see in my head with my mind's eye...? I hate it when I look 'mtf' - that's my term for when I look sort of in-between... Obviously I don't look that feminine as I'm masculine in general, so I don't think I look like a woman per se. But then I don't look like a man either...! Just weirdish. It's because I use eyeliner etc. so sometimes I think I look like mtf early on in transition!

I'm not sure if others are able to see what I'm seeing in it! But it feels almost like a fake. I just have an uneasy feeling looking at that. Like it's hard to tell what gender I am.

The mtf feeling is hard to describe and not sure if others see my pics like that - but I'm not able to see a 'female' in my pics so I just see guy/male who's on HRT and on estrogen to become a woman and the makeup kinda accentuates that  :P. I especially hate the pics I look 'mtf' in!!! When I don't look like a girl even, but like something uneasy/weird... [And note: this in no way has to do anything with real mtfs/trans women! Just my way of describing to myself what's that weird ->-bleeped-<- I'm seeing...]

Aargh looking at that passport pic is driving me crazy!!! It just makes me feel like something is missing, like a beard or...  I hope others are unable to see what I'm seeing when they check my ID... x(((

You have my total sympathy Mr. Wolf. I totally hate my drivers license picture! It's a total tragedy! It looks like my face was put on hot and it ran! I totally hate it. I try to avoid showing my ID if at all possible.
Julia


Born 1998
Started hrt 2015
SRS done 5/21/2018
  •  

PurpleWolf

Pics like that passport make me think 'what am I doing?' 'who am I trying to fool here?!' I really don't look like a guy. I just look like an ugly woman(?) !
!!!REBIRTH=legal name change on Feb 16th 2018!!!
This is where life begins for me. It's a miracle I finally got it done.


My body is the home of my soul; not the other way around.

I'm more than anything an individual; I'm too complex to be put in any box.

- A social butterfly not living in social isolation anymore  ;D -
(Highly approachable but difficult to grasp)


The past is overrated - why stick with it when you are able to recreate yourself every day
  •  

PurpleWolf

Quote from: Julia1996 on March 25, 2018, 09:23:48 AM
You have my total sympathy Mr. Wolf. I totally hate my drivers license picture! It's a total tragedy! It looks like my face was put on hot and it ran! I totally hate it. I try to avoid showing my ID if at all possible.
Julia, I highly doubt that  ;D! I highly doubt you are able to look bad in any pic...
!!!REBIRTH=legal name change on Feb 16th 2018!!!
This is where life begins for me. It's a miracle I finally got it done.


My body is the home of my soul; not the other way around.

I'm more than anything an individual; I'm too complex to be put in any box.

- A social butterfly not living in social isolation anymore  ;D -
(Highly approachable but difficult to grasp)


The past is overrated - why stick with it when you are able to recreate yourself every day
  •