Quote from: PurpleWolf on March 19, 2018, 03:32:53 PM
What is your relationship with your face and facial features?
Do you like your face? Has it changed a lot after HRT? Are you happy with the changes?
Do you have facial dysphoria? Do you wish your face were more masculine/feminine?
Do you think your face affects your passing? When do you experience dysphoria?
Have other people complimented your face or commented on it? Do you think you are judging your features more harshly than other people?
Have you had any surgeries or treatments on your face? Or do you plan to? Why? Have these helped?
Do you think you look strikingly different after being on HRT? Do you think you look more alien or just more you? Did you find it hard to see your face (that you've grown used to) changing...?
What do you think/feel when you see old and new pics of your face? Do you recognize yourself in the old photos or not anymore?
Is there something you liked about your 'old face' and wish that was still there? Or did you use to hate all your facial features before? Has this changed now?
Were you ever scared of the possible/inevitable changes...? (even a little bit? even if you were waiting for them?)
Is there something that surprised you in your facial changes after being on hormones you didn't expect?
When you now see yourself in the mirror, do you see an obvious man or a woman - or do you still find 'gender flaws'?
Do you now resemble more your famele/male relatives?
Is your face a big part of your identity as an individual? Do you feel like this more after being on hormones? Do you now see 'you' when you look in the mirror?
I think face is an interesting topic from a trans point of view - after all people have grown used to looking a certain way. Even if having dysphoria even about the face - your face changing might feel peculiar as face usually equals 'yourself', and must be a big part of everyone's identity as a person.
A lot of questions... no need to answer them all ofc!
This thread is also touching this topic:
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,231549.msg2059212.html#msg2059212
When did you start recognizing yourself in the mirror (on hormones)?
Like usual, I"m going to answer these questions in order.
My face is okay. I like it more since starting T, since its looking more masculine these days. Yes, it has changed quite a bit. One of my sisters says I now "look like Dad." I took that as a high compliment!
I woulnd't say I have "facial dysphoria" so much as "when is my facial hair going to REALLY start growing in???" I have a slight beard now, and even slighter mustache, just enough to look somewhat male, but I wouldn't mind if I had twice the amount of facial hair. Like I mentioned before, one of my sisters now thinks I look like my Dad. I'm definitely judging my own face more harsh than others. My gender therapist keeps telling me, "It'll grow, just give it time." I know it will, but I want it NOWNOWNOWNOWNOW!
I have not had anything done to my face, nor do I plan on it. I've been debating on using Minoxidil, but the expense of it while being on Disability is one I can do without. So instead, I live vicariously through those on here that ARE using it. Its probably the closest I'll get to it until my own facial hair grows in more.
I most definitely look different since being on T! I now feel like a man with a woman's chest when I look topless into the mirror. I need to get my top surgery done so I can get my chest to match my face. I really didn't find the changes too alien until one day I looked in the mirror and didn't see "myself," but "a man's face with my eyes" looking back at me. I was shocked! I had gotten so used to looking at my mustache, my beard, and jawline that when I looked at myself that day and took in the whole picture, I didn't recognize myself! Now I'm going through the process of looking at my entire face instead of bits and pieces, so I"m slowly getting used to my new face.
When I look at myself in old pics, its not alien, but its more like "I don't look like that anymore, and I'm glad!" Im starting to look like how I always thought I should and that make me grin like crazy! I don't hate my old face, its simply a face I am happy to leave behind. There's not much I would have remain about my old face, but I WOULD like less wrinkles around my eyes! I"m older now, (56) and thus, I've acquired a few more than I had even a couple years ago.
I was a bit afraid of the changes, after all, most of the visual and auditory ones are permanent. I had to think long and hard about if I wanted to do that to my body, then I came to the realization that I wasn't really happy with my body, its just that after 54 years, I was used to how it looked and responded. Once I realized that, it was easy for me to decide to start T.
I think the only thing that surprised me about being on T is the sheer fact that I've actually grown ANY facial hair at all! One of my brothers took 50 years to be able to grow a mustache!
I still see "gender flaws," like I said before, I could do with more facial hair. I also occasionally still get misgendered, but those instances are a lot less nowadays. 95% of the time I am addressed as "sir," which even after nearly 16 months on T, still make me grin like a kid! I've been called "a pretty boy" because of my eyes, but I don't mind that. I even got a Pretty Boy shirt to emphasis it.
I think I look a lot like my brothers now, even with the sparsity of my facial hair. I look like a 14 year old version of my brothers, something that pleases me to no end!
I suppose my face is a big part of who I am, after all, its what people first see when hey meet me for the first time, right? I feel more comfortable with myself as a human being now, maybe that's something that's picked up on by new people I meet. I'm not quite yet seeing "me" when I look in the mirror, but its slowly sinking in that "yup, that's me!" when I see myself now!
I answered as many as I can because I find your questions not only help me figure out things about myself I didn't even realize, but helps me explain myself TO myself. Keep up the great work!
Ryuichi
