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First time you had a trans feeling?

Started by Lady Love, April 30, 2018, 03:55:53 AM

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Lady Love

I was talking about gaming with someone and realized that my first clear memory where the thought of being a woman made me happy.

I was ten and playing a pokemon game. Somebody tricked me by saying that if you played as a girl you got rarer pokemon. I don't think that is true, but I played as a girl. Eventually I realized no rare pokemon were spontaneously appearing and realized they had fooled me. Yet... I like being May. She was a cool girl in the show and I felt cool playing as her. Also, the guy character looked really stupid in that game (compared to May at least). I was only ten so of course i didn't know anything about what those feelings meant, but looking back its funny to think I've had these feelings for more than a decade.

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KathyLauren

I was seven and looking through a kid's magazine.  There was a picture of a teenage girl whom I though was pretty.  I so wanted to be her!
2015-07-04 Awakening; 2015-11-15 Out to self; 2016-06-22 Out to wife; 2016-10-27 First time presenting in public; 2017-01-20 Started HRT!!; 2017-04-20 Out publicly; 2017-07-10 Legal name change; 2019-02-15 Approval for GRS; 2019-08-02 Official gender change; 2020-03-11 GRS; 2020-09-17 New birth certificate
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naa

Around the age of twelve.  I'm not sure where it came from, but I just said to myself out loud "I wish I was a girl", and really meant it.  It's entirely possible I had feelings before this and hadn't processed them.  Maybe this is the first I can remember, because it was the first I vocalised.
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Lady Love

That's sweet Kathy :)
Quote from: naa on April 30, 2018, 08:07:41 AM
Around the age of twelve.  I'm not sure where it came from, but I just said to myself out loud "I wish I was a girl", and really meant it.  It's entirely possible I had feelings before this and hadn't processed them.  Maybe this is the first I can remember, because it was the first I vocalised.
I know what you mean I think. I did that much more recently at twenty three. I had feelings in that direction before but I hadn't thought it of it for a long time. But at the beginning of the day I didnt consider myself trans, and suddenly I knew I was a woman.

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Bari Jo

I had a couple strong feelings growing up that I attribute to being trans related now.  The first was when I was 6 and my sister way 7.  She got fitted for glasses since she needed them, and I was so envious.  I was envious of her all throughout growing up, still am. Anyway I pretended to need glasses too, so we could be the same.  That didn't last long.  My eyes stayed perfect till age 45.  The second was age 8.  I fooled around with a boy in the girls roll.  It was not as two boys, at least not to me.  We got caught and I was punished, still I thought about that a lot and why I enjoyed it. After that were the raids to moms and my sisters closets.  I was a cliche, but still in denial.

Bari Jo
you know how far the universe extends outward? i think i go inside just as deep.

10/11/18 - out to the whole world.  100% friends and family support.
11/6/17 - came out to sister, best day of my life
9/5/17 - formal diagnosis and stopping DIY in favor if prescribed HRT
6/18/17 - decided to stop fighting the trans beast, back on DIY.
Too many ups and downs, DIY, purges of self inbetween dates.
Age 10 - suppression and denial began
Age 8 - knew I was different
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Frae

First is hard to remember exactly. More a collection of hazy early canonized stories. Who knows how true they are now?

Playing sisters with a girl in my first year of school.

My mother telling me I had lovely long lashes and I should have been a girl, and agreeing silently.

Staring at the roof in my bed at night, imagining I had a twin sister who was just like me in every way, and how cool she would be.


So I think most of those are are 5-6 years old but who knows?
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Victoria L.

The first time I remember consciously recognizing that I would feel more at home as a girl was in fifth grade. I have really vivid memories of going out shopping with my family for my sister and being so jealous of her getting to shop for all of the neat clothes.

It would be a few years after that where I would understand that I am trans. Before that I thought it was just something wrong with me and that no one else had these feelings.
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Lady Love

So many various and touching stories. Thanks to everyone for sharing :)

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DawnOday

Dawn Oday

It just feels right   :icon_hug: :icon_hug: :icon_kiss: :icon_kiss: :icon_kiss:

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First indication I was different- 1956 kindergarten
First crossdress - Asked mother to dress me in sisters costumes  Age 7
First revelation - 1982 to my present wife
First time telling the truth in therapy June 15, 2016
Start HRT Aug 2016
First public appearance 5/15/17



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MarieLouise1982

I was about 6-7 at my nans , she was a really good looking woman. Was well in with the fashion at the time , she had a pair of thigh high white heels ....... well I had to put them on and strut my stuff around her flat lol. Nice memories :)
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stephaniec

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noleen111

I was 12 or 13 the first time I wished I was a girl. I was dragged to a wedding with my parents and it was very hot and humid and I had to wear suit. There was this girl there who was 15 and she was wearing a green strapless dress with sandals.. I wished that I was her.. 

Even though I regularly wore pantyhose and a cheer leader skirt in my teens, it was at 19 that I knew I was really a girl in a mans body. At 19 was the first time fully dressed as a woman. I wore a long sleeve blue dress that came down to my knees, I wore black pantyhose, with bra (Stuffed with bean bags) and a pair of panties.. shoes was a pair of court shoes with a 1 inch heel. (A friend helped me that night get dressed and get the clothes, she worked at a thrift store) It felt so right to be dressed like that..  With her encouragement I explored this feeling.
Enjoying ride the hormones are giving me... finally becoming the woman I always knew I was
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Rae anne

 I could write a novel about this but to keep it short things  started in grade school. I didn't know what I was but all the boys called me girl or other derogatory names. I threw a ball like a girl and in general didn't in. Eons later I realized they were right, and I still throw like a girl.
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Eryn T

So many of you ladies felt this at such youthful ages!

Maybe I felt it too when I was young, but I can only really remember about a month ago when I was walking around at work...like an electric shock I felt a slight 'itch' that you can't exactly reach in public.  That night I decided to scratch it, and was pretty much forever changed- though I still wasn't sure if I could be transgender at that point, either.

So, the actual moment would of had to have been the following 4 days after that where I trained the crap(and nearly ruined) my voice; when I actually sounded somewhat female, I was like, "YES! I CAN DO THIS!"  Every other obstacle is just another step to climb to reach my ultimate goal. That first step was my voice.
Looking to make and keep friends! Spreading the love, now that I can truly love myself!

Transition Blog: https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,237152.msg2131598.html#msg2131598

Youtube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCd5cx6Iok3BQYrGwdYbVqWA

Twitter: https://twitter.com/_TransGaming_
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Lady Love

Quote from: Eryn T on May 01, 2018, 07:47:45 AM
So many of you ladies felt this at such youthful ages!

Maybe I felt it too when I was young, but I can only really remember about a month ago when I was walking around at work...like an electric shock I felt a slight 'itch' that you can't exactly reach in public.  That night I decided to scratch it, and was pretty much forever changed- though I still wasn't sure if I could be transgender at that point, either.

So, the actual moment would of had to have been the following 4 days after that where I trained the crap(and nearly ruined) my voice; when I actually sounded somewhat female, I was like, "YES! I CAN DO THIS!"  Every other obstacle is just another step to climb to reach my ultimate goal. That first step was my voice.
I relate, because my feelings are only trans to me in retrospect. I wouldn't say I knew or even suspected until I was 23......... okay maybe I suspected a little ;*

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MaryT

One of my first memories, when I was about four, was of my mother telling me no, I couldn't be called Mary, because I was a boy.  When I asked her how she knew I was a boy, she replied "because of your teeth".  She didn't tell me the truth until I was eight, when she realised that I thought that women had willies.  That was a real shock, as until then I was sure that she was mistaken about my gender.

(A few months later, in the spare room where I went to change the toys I was playing with, a Playboy magazine appeared.  For many years afterwards, I presumed that it had been left there by mistake.  I now think that it was my parents' idea of sex education.  I did find it fascinating but I didn't learn much about sex.  I've never really noticed women's breasts and Playboy didn't show full frontal in 1964.)

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pamelatransuk

I knew I wished to be a girl at 4 and told my grandmother.

I prayed to God to turn me into a girl at 6 and for several years after.

My first crossdressing was aged 7 in a Wendy House ( as they are called here in UK - some places call them Play House).

I first heard the term ->-bleeped-<- aged 10 and yes it was while watching television with my grandmother and obviously she knew about me from our past discussion.

Pamela


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Marcieelizabeth

Quote from: Lady Love on April 30, 2018, 03:55:53 AM
I was talking about gaming with someone and realized that my first clear memory where the thought of being a woman made me happy.

I was ten and playing a pokemon game. Somebody tricked me by saying that if you played as a girl you got rarer pokemon. I don't think that is true, but I played as a girl. Eventually I realized no rare pokemon were spontaneously appearing and realized they had fooled me. Yet... I like being May. She was a cool girl in the show and I felt cool playing as her. Also, the guy character looked really stupid in that game (compared to May at least). I was only ten so of course i didn't know anything about what those feelings meant, but looking back its funny to think I've had these feelings for more than a decade.

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Did not realize I was Trans until about 10 months ago, but through therapy have realized at 2 - YES T-W-O I remember thinking I was going to be just like my sister and be a baton twirler in the parade and being happy, also at age 8 We had a switch clothes play -where I got to be a girl, and my sister a boy...!  I remember that vividly and knowing that this was who I was.  I just did not figure it to be transgender... GO FIGURE!
:-*

First memory of cross-dressing - age 8 - 1967
Marcie Since 6-17-17   :D
Out to wife 6-27-17  :D :D
Started HRT 10-13-17  :D :D :D
First time completely me at therapy on 10-31-17 <3
Started Finestrade on 11-1-17 <3
Estradiol and Spiro to therapeutic levels on 12-4-17
Went out totally as Marcie with friends sans beard 3-24-18
Estradiol increased second time 3-27-18
Out to both sisters 2-3-19

...it makes me smile to know its me, fearful about losing the good things in my life, anxious about every single step, doubting my resolve, determined to stop living a lie,  VERY hopeful for the future as myself, Marcie, and I am thankful to have this safe place
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Rachel_Christina

Probably 8-9-10? Sad to think it took another 15 years to deal with it :(


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Lady Love

Dang Marcie, that is young.

Thats part of why it is fun looking back. I thought it was fun being a girl in games for a long time but never realized it was core to my identity until now.

Rachel don't even worry girl, me too. I feel silly for taking so long sometimes, but the idea you want to alter things and the way people view you to become happier is a hard thing to come to grips with. We got plenty of time to live our lives ;*

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