I don't know how it is in Denver but I think that in most parts of the world, any violence short of murder rarely makes the news nowadays, and sometimes not even murder. 

Nothing can justify what that thug did.  I would advise early disclosure, though, not for moral or legal reasons but because being safe is more important than being right. A violent homophobe is unlikely to distinguish between gay and trans (not that gay people should be assaulted either), and what happened shows that even a kiss or less could trigger extreme brutality.

Perhaps it is especially sad that college students beat her up.  It would be nice to think that even one student would be too enlightened to take pleasure in brutality, let alone a group of them.  I think that some students feel unjustifiably superior to people that they presume to be less intelligent, which is usually everybody but themselves.

How awful for that poor woman and how scary for you and your family.

Quote from: JulieAllana on May 03, 2018, 03:43:06 PM
Good resource for female concealed carry locations with various clothing types.  Female run, they sell lots of different concealed carry products as well.  Instructable videos too.
https://thewellarmedwoman.com/

I feel a shopping spree coming on.  Thanks.

This is here and now where you are at, where I am at, everywhere. It doesn't have to be someone we are dating or even know, it can be a complete stranger. Most will never see it because there are laws and accepted behaviors, but the prison systems are full of people who did not abide by those constraints. It can and does happen, every time that I walk out my door I know that without a doubt and I am terrified. Not afraid,

Terrified.

After 2 1/2 years I am beginning to believe that will never go away.

The scum is not completely mistaken. Some, not all, police do not care. No one did anything about what happened to me. Also, I had talked in a recent post about a clerk that told the whole store that I was a "->-bleeped-<-" and not a girl at all. There was a police officer standing three feet from me who was talking to the clerk when I came up to pay for my coffee. He did respond to the comment, he laughed.

I am not exaggerating at all, it all happened.

It's not even that we are part of the marginalized, we are, but I lived that growing up to a degree that most, thankfully, will never understand. This is not that. That is more like the homeless people that are part of the landscape that everyone just looks over like they don't exist. This is hatred that will not just look over us or ignore us if they can help it. Hatred that does not need to know us to want to do the worst things imaginable to us. I have seen it up close, in my face screaming at me. Felt parts of me break and rip as it went on and on. I didn't think that I was going to die, I knew I was going to die.

I hate crying this hard.
I don't want to talk about it anymore.

It's very real, believe it and be careful.

Hm.  I don't know where this took place, but I do know in multiple states that this would be treated as a domestic violence crime (in Texas "assault causes serious bodily injury family violence), which on the upside will likely carry an emergency protective order from the magistrate as at least a victim notification upon release, but on the downside is only a misdemeanor (that's right kiddies selling pot is legally worse than assault) which means the bond will be set on the lower end and when they go to court will likely be sentenced to at most a couple months jail time if they aren't given back credit or a work release.  The short version is that this animal will be back on the street a lot sooner than he deserves.  I hope, I pray whatever state you live in had different laws than mine, because I see this garbage every night I go to work.

Gods bless,
Freyja

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Quote from: RobynTx on May 03, 2018, 10:38:05 AM
It's sad that this is becoming common place in the world.  Like others I had hopes for humanity.  Being in my job for as long as I have has taught me that most people are idiots. 

Situational awareness is something everyone should practice and do every day.  Yes she was attacked in a house where she felt comfortable.  Yes like Sarah suggested any time someone is coming out to another person it should be in public.  While I'm not on the dating scene many others are.  I do keep my situational awareness up at all times.  I haven't carried my gun in quite some time but I do need to get back into that.  It's just so hard finding women's clothing that makes it easy to carry a Glock.

More than that, before coming out, it's wise to get his opinion on trans people and associated issues, by having a third party bring it up in conversation. If he acts transphobic, move on quietly.

Quote from: JMJW on May 03, 2018, 06:59:16 PM
More than that, before coming out, it's wise to get his opinion on trans people and associated issues, by having a third party bring it up in conversation. If he acts transphobic, move on quietly.

That's a really good idea, jerks shouldn't have the satisfaction that this one did. She shared part of her that's deeply personal and he decides to use it against her. What a dirt bag

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If he does make the news, or if any article is written, or even if any information about him comes to light, he should be publically named and shamed across social media, possibly with a trending hashtag, so every woman knows to stay clear of this psycho.

These events are rather disturbing, my heart goes out to the victim of this crime and I hope she is able to get any and all medical treatment necessary for her recovery

I also hope she is able to retain a good lawyer who will sue the ever livin' stuff out of this guy - Nothing says revenge like being able to look a creep like this in the eye on the steps of a courthouse and say "I own you for the rest of your natural life"   

This is a really horrific crime, a very painful experience for the victim and represents the worst aspect of society.

Not only has the violence taken place but the victim has been further abused by the undressing and photographing and then the perpetrator not only feels no remorse but is convinced he is right to have done what he did. This makes me cry and also gives me anger.

I am unfamiliar with Colorado Law but I hope he feels the full force of the law and is jailed accordingly.

Pamela

My dad didn't disclose any names. He doesn't discuss many of the things he encounters but he does if it's something that particularly upsets him. Police officers do discuss cases with their families. As long as they don't disclose names and other personal details there is nothing wrong with that. Cops are just people and like all people they sometimes need to talk about things that bother them. As for me posting what he told me here, again, no names are used. I shared it because I think we need to be aware of what can happen to us. I did nothing illegal posting this and my dad is actually the one who suggested I share it here.

This is beyond horrific. 


He has basically admitted to a hate crime. I'm thinking Colorado has such laws.  By removing her panties and photographing her he has also committed a sexual assault.  That should hopefully get to him since by his logic he will be accused of sexually assaulting a "f*****". 

The shaving the head is what really got to me. I also have a fear of my hair being messed with.  A mostly irrational fear that when I get it cut I'll get an anti trans stylist that will chop it off. 

Her other injuries will heal faster and it will take so long for the hair to grow back. Every time she looks in a mirror she will be reminded of the attack. 

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Quote from: Julia1996 on May 04, 2018, 08:19:58 AM
My dad didn't disclose any names. He doesn't discuss many of the things he encounters but he does if it's something that particularly upsets him. Police officers do discuss cases with their families. As long as they don't disclose names and other personal details there is nothing wrong with that. Cops are just people and like all people they sometimes need to talk about things that bother them. As for me posting what he told me here, again, no names are used. I shared it because I think we need to be aware of what can happen to us. I did nothing illegal posting this and my dad is actually the one who suggested I share it here.

Fair enough. I'd like to know if you are as horrified as I am by the percentage of people advocating for rape as a just penalty?

We are better than those who wish us harm based upon nothing other than fear and bigotry.

I find the whole tale extremely tragic and hope that it doesn't alarm people too much, but serve as a reminder that pyschopaths are out there and one should be reasonable about their own safety.  It is definitely best to not tempt fate by discussing in a completely private setting when there is even the remotest potential for a reaction like described.

It will be interesting to find out what form of justice is handed to him in a court of law

  I was severely beaten when I was younger, broken nose, fractured eye orbit , and three broken ribs. So I know what that girl is going through and its much more than just physical pain. Whatever happens to the scum that did this to her I hope it is horrific.   

I just read this thread. That incident was horrific! It definitely fuels my fears despite someone like me being far less likely than a young woman looking to date. The danger of homophobia and transphobia in the cismale population is very real. Definitely has me thinking about concealed carry again. I don't really want to but in this world you never know.

I did a cleanup of the original post and subsequent responses; if one of your posts got edited or deleted, I hope you don't take it negatively. This thread is important, too important to let it get sidetracked un-necessarily.

Knowing that being beat or killed is a real possibility, is why I always disclosed on dating profiles, and took precautions to make sure those profiles got read. Then, no dating until at  least a week of communication. It is also why I got some martial arts training. I have the scars on my face from the sparring. It was brutal enough, but nothing like what happened to that unfortunate woman.
I can certainly hope and pray the courts make an example out of the guy that beat her up. Jail time is too good for him. He deserves prison!

OMG, I hope that scummy jerk gets the book thrown at him and then he gets put UNDER the prison!!!  How horrific!!!  How could someone be so cruel?

That poor young woman, I hope they make her abuser pay for her medical AND therapy bills!  Hopefully, she'll get therapy for the abuse!

This is one of many reason why I'm stealth.  Fortunately for me, I'm in a long-term relationship with another transman, but still!!!  I'm mortified!

Ladies, PLEASE be safe out there! 

Ryuichi

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Quote from: Chelsea on May 03, 2018, 10:09:27 AM
This is awful. I hope he gets what he deserves! This is one reason I haven't gone in public yet because of being scared of things like this. 

Do not fear. The risk of violence can be mitigated.