I feel the same! I skipped our official public health care system (Finland) and just said to them, screw you, not going to first of all answer to your humiliating psychiatric questions, and secondly, not going to live halfway there, for years and years, most likely closer to 7 years from start to finish!
Got a private gyno from Estonia, gender specialist from England and surgeons from Thailand. And surgery is coming in less than three weeks!
Got my transition done in less than a year, although of course the hormones will continue to do their magic years to come, but the pulling of the teeth part is soon over.
Compared to our gender clinic system, which most likely at it´s current stage, takes about seven years and you are on the mercy of some arbitrary decisions. I wasn´t going to hang in a loose noose, for years

I find that most of my doubts and anxiety over the surgery are now gone, the closer I get to the date. Of course the healing part worries me, but...it is something that I cannot really affect much, if something goes wrong. Thankfully, statistically the things that can go wrong are quite minor.