TS and CD have this term, 'passing'. The idea is to have someone treat you exactly as your displayed gender. A simple example is being called by your preferred pronoun.

Well, I almost passed last night, and it made me happy. I was in line at the store, and it's one of those stores with a 'club card'. So the cashier said something, along the lines of "can I have your card ma'am?" I didn't really register that he said anything, so I turned around to face him and gave him my card. After we got through the line, I heard the bagger tell the cashier "It's alright, sometimes it's hard to tell".

It was at that point my wife said "I think he might have called you ma'am." Which made us both smile.

I consider that passing. Some androgynes want to be viewed as neither gender, or unable to be classified as either. I am the sort that likes being classified as both. So I am happy that he thought I was female, but then changed his mind and thought I was male. So for me, in order to 'pass' I need to 'almost pass', if that makes sense.

And the best part of it? Neither the cashier or the bagger meant it in a bad way. The cashier appeared worried that he may have offended me for calling me a female. And the bagger seemed to have a tone that suggested "Don't worry about it, I doubt he/she took offense." They both gave me genuine looking smiles (albeit with a look of curiosity on their face). We were delayed on our way out due to technical problems (technology always fails at the worst times) and the cashier walked up to me and apologized for delay (his line was empty at the time) and just gave us this really warm smile.

Maybe we should have 'confusing' instead of 'passing'.

Perplexing instead of passing maybe...

Quote from: Pica Pica on March 19, 2008, 06:52:46 PM
Perplexing instead of passing maybe...

A much better suggestion.

Quote from: Pica Pica on March 19, 2008, 06:52:46 PM
Perplexing instead of passing maybe...

Yes! I like that.

I always find it quite amusing when people do a "double take" when they see me. I can usually tell when someone's head will turn again for a second look.

The students at the high school I'm working at still haven't figured out whether I am male or female. It has been up for debate ever since I started working there, about 8 months back. They have been testing me, greeting me with "Hello Miss" or some such thing, while their friends are giggling and wondering how I will react.
None, however, has had the courage to come right up and ask me which gender I am. It's all very hush-hush "he/she shouldn't know we are talking about him/her", hahaha.

I still always get a kick out of unintentionally passing as female... must be the 'previously identified as m2f' in me 

Z

I like what Pica said, "perplexing". I get bothered for some reason if someone would intentionally point out my birth sex, but at the same time I think I would be bothered if I was referred to as male.

Gosh I'm hard to please!

I take that back, if I were intentionally trying to dress up more androgynous (slightly leaning towards masculine) I'd be wonderfully pleased if someone thought I was a dude.

I used to get mistaken for male all the time when I was younger.  When I wore my Goth gear, including a ton of heavy cosmetics, people would read me as a male in female attire.  I once had a rather chemically challenged individual come tearing up to me in a nightclub and plead with me to tell him if I was male or female because he couldn't work it out and it had been worrying him for hours.

That kind of thing doesn't happen anymore, I'm just too big to be mistaken for a guy.  Now I just get called an "ugly *****."  Oh well, at least I'm shaking people up somehow...

I wish I could perplex.

I don't think I pass/perplex othewise I would feel happier, but I do have moments of passing or perplexing. If I had the choice of the binary I think I would much rather pass as a woman than as a man, but I suspect this is more a rejection of my birth sex than anything else and it would probably get old real fast.

I was at the super market with my daughter waiting to be served from the deli when an old lady said to the attendent that "that lady is next" refering to myself. I kind of felt bad for her when she took a second look and and corrected herself, she looked really uncomfortable even though I wasn't. It made me smile though, I was feeling particulalry fem that day.

I've been building a fence at home the last couple days and went to the hardware store for some extra supplies wearing my work boots, all grubbied up, earmuffs still on my head, all muck and muscle. The cashier guy called me 'love'. He must have picked up on other cues despite appearances.

I get called love and other female type handles a lot, but only by the regulars who have talked to me...the people just in off the street usually call me 'boss' as every male is called.

perhaps they mistake you for this guy -

obviously.