Quote from: Annaiyah on December 30, 2018, 05:23:58 PM
And yet, i'm so jealous and would willingly suffer any amount of pain to have female hips and to have started HRT'ing at 17 or younger so you ought to be grateful you have them.
I think those things are depending on the point you look at it from.
I always had a rather feminin body, never developed anybody hair, no Adams Apple, etc. For me, who was told that I am a boy, this was a lot of reasons fr all kind of dysphoria, because I never could keep up with my peers, and never could look like them. I always was a kind of a wannabe! Almost like a girl trying to be a boy, but never could be a real boy!
Now, that I am allowed to be a woman, those attributes are of advantage to me. I am growing my own breasts (no estrogen needed for those), I have no body hair, no receding hair line or other loss of hair, still no Adams Apple and a rather high frequency voice, I don't need any facial surgery (my avatar shows my unaltered head), no nose job, nothing, what causes a lot of dysphoria to other trans women.
But I have no real gender identity, I did not know what gender I really was when I was young, I just was told that I am a boy, and I tried to be one (I now know that I never was one), but I still don't have a clear gender identity! I have to decide every morning what gender I am supposed to be for the day. Either gender does not give me any dysphoria, I am just plain empty for any gender feeling. I lately tending to heavily lean to the female side, because I like my female roll way better than I liked my male roll, but my brain has no clear road-map of what I am. This determination what many trans women have, which makes them know by 100% to be a woman, is missing for me. I just know for 100% hat I don't want to be, and that is to continue my life to not to know what or who I am!
As I said, it is not always that easy to have features others envy one for, because these features can be a pretty heavy personal burden!