I think their thought is getting you up and moving improves circulation which improves healing. It also reduces the chance for blood clots.

So

My former teammates had pizza on our manager's deck last night. Plus ice cream. Everyone regardless of layed off or not was there. Even remotes on facetime. Even someone who resigned 4 months ago.

There was some serious tea spilled. Real eye opening stuff about who thinks what about who. It's just a kind of wow thing when nice nice people talk openly about how poorly they were treated in private.

Regardless

The group eventually got around to the job hunt conversation. We all agree, we're all looking at 6 months, maybe more. The job market is *that* tough for engineers. Then people started talking resume's. "I have touched mine in.. so many years," was the general drift.

My take on my own resume?

"Well. I can honestly say I am a whole new person since I last updated my resume."

big big laughs all around.

I am fortunate my transition started in a job I got a team so darn supportive and fun.

~Jenn

When my wife was bed bound I'd get her out of bed every day.
I could do that but no hospital can afford that level of care, now that two people are required legally operate a Hoyer Lift.
But, simply rolling someone out of bed every day will prevent bed sores and other health issues.

Marion

What kind of engineer are you, Jen?

Quote from: Oldandcreaky on July 25, 2024, 10:43:50 AMWhat kind of engineer are you, Jen?

Software QA. I have a hardware background so I've done a lot with HW/SW apps. In a previous life I was a chip designer, which Lynn Conway always found interesting.

~Jenn

Thanks, Jenn. I have the greatest respect for engineers. My Chromebook was designed by engineers. Its software was written by engineers. The lamp beside was engineered and on and on and on. Doctors garner great respect, but they'd be witch doctors without engineers who design all their gadgets.

Quote from: Oldandcreaky on July 26, 2024, 06:58:37 AMThanks, Jenn. I have the greatest respect for engineers. My Chromebook was designed by engineers. Its software was written by engineers. The lamp beside was engineered and on and on and on. Doctors garner great respect, but they'd be witch doctors without engineers who design all their gadgets.

The coolest part of getting to know Lynn Conway before she passed is knowing that a trans woman very literally made modern tech like phones and laptops possible.

Pretty cool link of the day - https://www.today.com/video/lynn-conway-microchip-pioneer-and-trans-rights-advocate-dies-at-86-213517381734


~Jenn

So cool to have known her!

Quote from: Oldandcreaky on July 26, 2024, 10:39:28 AMSo cool to have known her!

Even better for me is being able to say a trans woman changed the world. very literally.

Quote from: Jenn104 on July 26, 2024, 01:34:33 PMEven better for me is being able to say a trans woman changed the world. very literally.

I'm assuming she was one of many over time, but most were likely buried alive in the closet while still managing to change the world.

I am feel very done today. I can't understand how my karma is so messed up.

So

The company - that is the former company - offered 2 months of outplacement assistance. I engaged with the people. They reformat your resume. They meet with you and throw a pile of common sense advice at you. Then I get to ask my questions.

I was crystal clear. I am a transwoman. My personal and professional life overlap or I'd never say anything. However, I wanted to double check for what I say about myself being trans, to whom, and when sounds fair. In a nutshell-- I owe no one any explanations except in the context of hiring date and major surgery coming. The consultant saw that as correct. I value the feedback.

Then the consultant went the 'extra mile'. "You know I've done a lot of reading and no one who does surgery is ever happy." I told her clear she was wrong and poorly sourced. "I am a Mom. You need to listen". I stopped talking and she got the hint eventually.

While the former company assured me they would "take care of it". They didn't. I had to call the firm to remove contacts etc. Nor is their offer reasonable or generous.

I have not signed my separation agreement. The former company is talking out of two sides of their mouth.  I am going to call the Mass Commission Against Discrimination, although think they can do nothing for me.

I am feeling tired and a little beat up. Under a month to GCS.

~Jenn

Sorry to hear that, Jenn. Sometimes filing a complaint is enough. The Commission may not be able to take action on your behalf, but they can notify the company that a complaint has been filed. If the company fears a possible lawsuit, they may make it right with you to dodge that bullet. Fingers crossed and hope it works out. You have enough stress going on without all that.

Quote from: Lori Dee on July 30, 2024, 08:28:35 AMSorry to hear that, Jenn. Sometimes filing a complaint is enough. The Commission may not be able to take action on your behalf, but they can notify the company that a complaint has been filed. If the company fears a possible lawsuit, they may make it right with you to dodge that bullet. Fingers crossed and hope it works out. You have enough stress going on without all that.

Thank you.

My thinking exactly.

I know a few HR people also in the lay off. I am well advised. My HR team is pretty good actually.

~Jenn

Wow that's ridiculous Jenn. I know you said your Karma is messed up, but you are more together than you think if you didn't absolutely lose it on that person. We don't need to discuss on how many levels what she said and the context in which she said it is inappropriate.

Agree 100% that a complaint has a real chance of putting a little FOG into your former employer. Good luck and sorry again you had to deal with all that. ❤️

Just keep poking them with a stick, it will get annoying and they may give way just to stop it.

Quote from: davina61 on July 30, 2024, 10:00:03 AMJust keep poking them with a stick, it will get annoying and they may give way just to stop it.

It doesn't work like that. I'll sign a bad deal tomorrow. ish.

What bothers me isn't the deal. I recognize my own emotions. I've been here before. When it came out my wife prayed for me to die, a bit of me died. Part of my self confidence came from my former company. They didn't lift a finger to do anything. They know I have a deadline to sign an separation agreement. I see them differently

very differently.

and it hurts.

~Jenn

Two questions, two answers this morning.

Q1: How do you know your electrologist is truly a close friend?

When you're talking over a good zapping, then the conversation turns to GCS prep. When I said I am putting up a few meals in the freezer, she shoots back--  "Be sure to put a couple of hot dogs and some meatballs in the freezer."   

Funny as the day is long, right?


Q2: Where am I off too?
I bounced back a little. I am not gonna let no asp holes win. Nope. It is time to hitch up my big girl panties and do something.

The Massachusetts Commission Against Discrimination called me back a second time yesterday, making sure I know how to file. I am off to file, which much be done in person. I think they'd like me to file.

To be clear, I am not filing for dollars. I believe the only way to let the former company and their outplaces service know what they've done is to file. To them sorry and a put on the bum is enough. I have a different perspective. My sense of if I don't do this someone else is going to live it is up.

I am human. I will accept money. It isn't what I am after. Besides, money is an easy cop out. It won't change anything for them. Likewise, I have serious doubts my situation will be accepted by MCAD as a case. You never know until you try.


Happy Friday!

~Jenn

Good luck, Jenn!

I am proud of you. Make them grovel. I hope they sincerely apologize and that you are generously compensated for your trouble. I'm still rooting for ya.

See you sharpen that stick!!

I filed. Not how'd you guess.

I filed against the outplacement service. I had some choices. I decided what is important to me is making sure the person that devalued my existence is educated. I chose the path most likely to make that happen. If I am going to sell my soul I am not selling it cheaply. in no way shape or form was I staring at heaping piles of cash. This is better. for now.

I have a long road ahead. I merely took a small first step.

~Jenn