Quote from: Lori Dee on August 02, 2024, 08:12:44 AMGood luck, Jenn!

I am proud of you. Make them grovel. I hope they sincerely apologize and that you are generously compensated for your trouble. I'm still rooting for ya.

I don't believe in groveling or punitive justice. I don't believe in punishment.

I am already functionally illegal in multiple states. "punishment" does nothing except reinforce negative stereotypes, in my opinion. Restorative justice - "education" - can change understanding. I will never regain my rights in total with punishment. I can do so via education.

~Jenn

We interrupt Jennifer's normally scheduled blog for an important announcement--

 Today was pre-op appointments day. Short of a lab work fail I am good to go for GCS.

We now return you to Jennifer's regularly scheduled blog. 

~Jenn

Progress! Hooray!

I remember those days leading up to my surgery. I was sure something would pop up and cause a delay, so I was a nervous wreck for several weeks before surgery! I hope everything goes smoothly for you Jenn. Don't forget, we're here if you need us.

Love always -- Jess

Quote from: Jessica_Rose on August 05, 2024, 08:19:52 PMI remember those days leading up to my surgery. I was sure something would pop up and cause a delay, so I was a nervous wreck for several weeks before surgery! I hope everything goes smoothly for you Jenn. Don't forget, we're here if you need us.

Love always -- Jess

Thanks Jess!

I read my chart before falling asleep last night-- I am good to go for surgery. Kinda cool.

I get your point completely. I am in the healthy paranoia zone. I am still rational enough to know if I am careful, nothing is going to happen, but............ um yeah.

Right now, the anxiety-o-meter^(tm) is holding steady around a 4 or 5.

Stay tuned!

~Jenn

Congratulation Jenn, Before you know it you will be waking up and starting recovery. 

Quote from: Gina P on August 06, 2024, 05:14:13 AMCongratulation Jenn, Before you know it you will be waking up and starting recovery.

Thank Gina.

Weird Questions I asked Department-- "Can I track walking around the hospital on Strava?"

"Yes.. but you won't want to necessarily."

~Jenn

Heavy Dose of Reality Week--

- I have apparently made if past a phone screen and await scheduling a second interview.

- I just hung up with my health insurance concierge. We agree on what we think my policy says for what GCS costs. Down to the dilators, thank you.

- I have notice from the state they are investigating my discrimination claim. Roughly three weeks from now I will get the initial report. It's pretty real.

- The unemployment people need me to schedule some meeting "by months end". I have limited time because of my GCS date. "Hey! I am having surgery, I have less time.. can you call me back to schedule" is some foreign language to these people.

- I continue on prep for all things GCS...

its all getting ummmm real...

~Jenn

Quote from: Jenn104 on August 13, 2024, 12:30:47 PMHeavy Dose of Reality Week--

- I have apparently made if past a phone screen and await scheduling a second interview.

- I just hung up with my health insurance concierge. We agree on what we think my policy says for what GCS costs. Down to the dilators, thank you.

- I have notice from the state they are investigating my discrimination claim. Roughly three weeks from now I will get the initial report. It's pretty real.

- The unemployment people need me to schedule some meeting "by months end". I have limited time because of my GCS date. "Hey! I am having surgery, I have less time.. can you call me back to schedule" is some foreign language to these people.

- I continue on prep for all things GCS...

its all getting ummmm real...

~Jenn

Hey Jenn - fingers crossed on the interview!

Good luck with the interview.

And the finish line is in sight. Go, Jenn, go!

Best wishes dear XX

Jenn, just caught up on the blog.  It sounds like you are already moving forward!  You are a good example for the rest of us!  Especially how you are figuring out your own coping mechanisms!

Thank you for sharing.

Eight Days. The anxiety-o-meter is running around a 6 to 6 1/2, trending up.

I am down to single digits.


The weekend was pretty good. I volunteered for a shift at the Salem Jazz Fest then met friends who'd grabbed a spot with a blanket. There was some mighty fine music to be had. I have to say the HS jazz band had some serious chops. For kids, they have ears and were a fun to listen to. Showing up authentically (sans wig, with a hat and my curly, shoulder length locks) is a complete non-issue at this point. OK, I had to do the change tee shirt trick by pulling out the one under. Hardly earth shattering stuff.  I show up and its a non-event because that's the tone I set.

I met a few friends pre-yoga then got my yoga on. I needed mat time. I have a huge knot in my back, I think from stress/anxiety. It felt good to stretch. Rest of the day was cleaning, and getting ready for the week. Its kind of a big week.

I am off to blood work shortly. It is also a full moon so it's time to smudge. I have my last pre-op group where I'll actually be pre op. I need to do some follow up with unemployment...

and I am on the go. Life is different. Life is the same.  Hang on tight, its going to be a heck of a week.

~Jenn

All the folks that just listen to recorded music are missing out, you cant beat live stuff for the feelings

Quote from: davina61 on August 19, 2024, 09:40:04 AMAll the folks that just listen to recorded music are missing out, you cant beat live stuff for the feelings

I couldn't agree more. There is nuance to a live performance lost in the studio.

All the acts swung in their own way. I danced. A lot.

~Jenn

Quote from: Northern Star Girl on July 15, 2024, 04:15:49 PMI am eagerly awaiting your news on your job searching....
      I am wishing you well in that effort.[/size]

HUGS, Danielle

Well..

I average sending about a dozen resumes a week. So far these have produced about a phone screen a week. Most of these go no where. To digress a moment, I am in close touch with a few other laid off peers. I seem to be way ahead so far in "hit rate". This is the first time I am job hunting as my authentic self. No, I have not disclosed I am trans or GCS is nigh.

I had an on camera round of interviews yesterday which went well. I'd potentially have 2 more rounds of interviews. The hiring market is really tight. I got very good feedback during and at the close of the interview. I hadn't planned to disclose I am having major surgery next week, yet I did. I see no reason to explain otherwise. The company is trying to squeeze in the next round this week.

I s'pose I don't lack for confidence in my authentic self. Job interviews are a different experience. Every "no" comes with a little nagging voice in the back of my head "is it because...". Yeah, I talk to my therapist about that nag. Yesterday was one of those little victories in transition that make a difference. The hiring manager, who is male and in the midwest, cared about what I was saying. If he was put off by how I looked (tres professional I thought) he didnt show it.

So yeah, a small win because realizing its not a polite yet automatic no once I get on camera or in person is a win. Stay tuned on this one.


and now Danielle, you are up to date. ish.

~Jenn

GCS is getting awfully close...


I had a good week. A really good week actually.

I'd been very uptight about interviewing, especially in the context of being seen on camera. Well, four interviews later I believe I am still in the process. They understand my surgical schedule, although not the exact procedure, and are willing to wait to do the last round.  fingers crossed.

I had my last check in with my therapist. Frankly, I needed to talk some family things out. Which I did. On the way out she kind of casually threw out "you know its the right thing for you." I told her 'yeah, I figured we didn't need to say it.' We hugged. I like her very much.

I got my yoga on mid-week. Nothing like time on a mat to stay grounded. I love the chill vibe of the studio. Yoga's been a godsend of mindfulness. I love the community. The studio isn't my first friend group or even my second. It's become a good one though. I believe the more places you belong to, the more friend groups you establish, the more you put yourself out there, the better transition goes.

I got an urgent call from the urology resident a few days back. Apparently the double checked my lab work. They decided to treat me for a UTI even though I am asymptomatic. I am amused-- I guess my body decided not to wait for umm updated plumbing. Not that current version can't get a UTI, it's easier with the new model.

Finally, the queer cycling group got together last night. Copious amounts of wine on a local establishments deck were consumed. "Birthday and Re-birthday" was the theme of the night. My GCS coincides with someone else's birthday. We had a fine time. They gave me a mix of serious and not so serious gifts. There was a lot of laughter and a lot of friendship. They are wonderful people that have made a real difference in my journey. I feel very very humbled and grateful.

I am off to get my morning walk in. Then a last weekend of cleaning, seeing mom and sis, checking in with the kids. I feel ready.

~Jenn

You sound ready, Jenn. I'm smiling.

Quote from: Oldandcreaky on August 24, 2024, 06:32:34 AMYou sound ready, Jenn. I'm smiling.

Thanks O&C. I feel ready for surgery. If I have anxiety its more about the after care than the procedure. I mean I plan to sleep through the procedure.

~Jenn

The Official Team Jenn Cheerleading Squad is still here rooting for ya!
Go, Jenn, go.

Seriously, thoughts and prayers are with you.