Congrats, BTW!

Quote from: Lori Dee on September 15, 2024, 10:33:38 PMAllie, step away from the espresso. Slowly.

LOL - Believe it or not, NOT a caffeine drinker at all. 

Quote from: imallie on September 15, 2024, 11:09:29 PMLOL - Believe it or not, NOT a caffeine drinker at all. 

I believe it. Not with headaches, no way.

I am so happy that you are getting things done now. Then come vacation time... you'll be even busier. 

By the way... wanted to see what folks thought about this. My wife and I were in immediate agreement about, even the radical (sort of) solution... but curious if others view it similarly?

So... posted a photo to FB today of us and some friends at lunch. It's a college classmate of ours, her wife, and another person we went to college with but who graduated a year after us.

Anyway, posted the pic and my wife's eldest sister — who loves my wife dearly BTW — likes the post and makes a comment: "OMG you (my wife) look JUST like that other woman in the blue stripes!"

The other woman being the wife of our friend. Who, while a lovely woman, was a female of the approximate same height as my wife and both wore sunglasses in the photo and smiled? Otherwise she had my wife by about 50 lbs and generally did not look like her.

REGARDLESS my first thought was Yikes! You just don't DO that! Compare two women in a photo. For all you know you might be insulting one, or both of them. So why on earth would you say that? It just seemed like, as I said to my wife, "she had not spent 70+ years growing up at a woman."

But to avoid her being, I thought, embarrassed... or starting something uncomfortable, I marked the comment as "hidden". In effect making it vanish.  My wife was in agreement, as she thought it made sense to remove it.

I said, if she questioned me, and I didn't want to tell her the truth (which I absolutely did NOT) I could just say I hit the wrong button when trying to "love" it.

What do you all think of a) the comment and b) our solution?

It's not a big issue, such as equality, so the path of least resistance makes sense.

I think I would have done the same,

Quote from: Oldandcreaky on September 16, 2024, 08:35:37 AMIt's not a big issue, such as equality, so the path of least resistance makes sense.

I agree it isn't a big issue, but would anyone ever say such a thing? I think when people tell people they look like other people it almost always results in hurt feelings (unless you're doing the flattery thing: "oh my god, you look like (insert gorgeous celebrity here)!). 
And comparing two people just seems like double jeopardy.
But again, that's why I asked. It hit my cringe bone really hard but maybe others don't necessarily see it that way.
And even though my wife and I agree, I still wanted to ask because it's helpful to calibrate my brain to hear others' opinions. 

Quote from: imallie on September 15, 2024, 10:31:26 PMOk... so in the last week I have:

Got my passport
Got my passport card
Got my PCP referral letter for bottom surgery
Got my therapist letter for same
Sent both letters to my preferred surgeons to begin the process for initial consult
Updated name on bank accounts
Have new credit card and ATM based on these accounts coming
Got Medicare name updated
Got new Medicare card sent
And made an appointment to sign up for TSA Precheck on Tuesday morning

I feel as if I've been going at this at such a high speed that there's an Allie-shapped hole in the transition wall.

So I think, other than that Tuesday appt... I'm going to let myself have this week to breathe a bit. I mean, if things come up (if I get a call to schedule an initial consult, for example) fine -- but otherwise, I think a little break to recharge is probably warranted.

Honestly, once you start making analogies between yourself and the Kool-Aid man? You REALLY need to slow the heck down.

Love,
Allie

Quote from: imallie on September 16, 2024, 09:42:58 AMI agree it isn't a big issue, but would anyone ever say such a thing? I think when people tell people they look like other people it almost always results in hurt feelings (unless you're doing the flattery thing: "oh my god, you look like (insert gorgeous celebrity here)!). 
And comparing two people just seems like double jeopardy.
But again, that's why I asked. It hit my cringe bone really hard but maybe others don't necessarily see it that way.
And even though my wife and I agree, I still wanted to ask because it's helpful to calibrate my brain to hear others' opinions. 

It didn't make me cringe.

Quote from: Oldandcreaky on September 16, 2024, 12:57:23 PMIt didn't make me cringe.

Well that's good. The less universal it is, the less bad about her instincts I feel. Might just be our damage. LOL

A couple of random thoughts after being in my head all day..

I think I'm at an age now where I no longer have a place in my life for friends who never get around to asking "How are you?"at any point in a conversation.

——

The ones who stood by you while you were rebuilding your life? They're your people.


'Night all,
Love Allie

So how are you?

Quote from: imallie on September 17, 2024, 12:27:17 AMI think I'm at an age now where I no longer have a place in my life for friends who never get around to asking "How are you?"at any point in a conversation.

What's worse are the ones you ask, but as you're two words into telling, they cut across your bow with more words about them, them, them.

Cute, Davina. And spot on!

Was there a specific incident, Allie, that had your writing what you wrote?

Quote from: davina61 on September 17, 2024, 03:55:24 AMSo how are you?

Nunna yer beeswax 😳

But REALLY... I'm doing fine, thanks for asking. And you? 😘

Quote from: Oldandcreaky on September 17, 2024, 04:10:55 AMWhat's worse are the ones you ask, but as you're two words into telling, they cut across your bow with more words about them, them, them.

Cute, Davina. And spot on!

Was there a specific incident, Allie, that had your writing what you wrote?

Yes, it's at least the same if not worse if the words are said without meaning and space to respond.

As to something specific? It's more just replaying things in my head during a rare quiet day sometimes patterns emerge and you start making sense of them, you know?

Have a very nice day Allie!

Chrissy

Quote from: ChrissyRyan on September 17, 2024, 07:30:13 AMHave a very nice day Allie!

Chrissy

You too sweetheart ❤️

Just took care of my TSA Precheck. Easy breezy lemon squeezey.

Of course I did forget about one question when I originally did this a couple years ago....

"Have you ever used another name?"

"Oh, yes I have"

"Maiden name?"

"Ummm, no...."

(Gave old name)

"Come again?"

I know it's affirming but I'm also REALLY looking forward to being done with this particular form of it. It's very loud, if you know what I mean.

Settling into the living my life portion is much preferable at this point.

Hey all - I thought of deleting the above post, but I'm leaving it up.

It's REALLY tin-eared and ungrateful. Sure it's a cute story but that's not the point AT ALL.

But the reason not to delete it is that sometimes people will say awfully nice things about me here, and I do honestly think I try really hard to be a good person. I try every day to be grateful for everything in my life, and to think about others.

But even I can slip. I'm not going to make excuses based on what's going on this week — it's irrelevant. Just to say, for any who read the above story like someone complaining that their Ferrari isn't shiny enough (or something, I don't know anything about cars ... sorry), my sincerest apologies.

I will continue to strive to do better. To be better.

Love,
Allie

Fine thanks for asking, yup someone's ears were burning today when I curst them for the bodge job on the wiring in my mates Comet. They were doing their best I suspect with the little knowledge they had, Brian said how do you sort that as it would have took me a week but easy for me. Each to their own .
 Now I would take that as a compliment being asked if that was my maiden name, never happens to me!